Frederick's Touch
II
“You wished to speak to me?” Edmund asked, stepping into the extravagant drawing room.
“Yes, honey, sit down,” Mrs. Richards patted the seat next to her.
As he took a seat beside his mother, she placed her teacup on the table across of her before turning to face him.
“You know of the ball coming up, yes?”
“Yes, Mother.” Edmund looked at her curiously.
“The Baker girls will be attending, including their eldest, Martha.” She took his hands in hers.
“I would like you to accompany her, Edmund. She is a beautiful, intelligent, and graceful young woman. I’m sure you’ll find her…suitable.”
Edmund was surprised by his mother’s request. She had never interfered in his personal life before, so why do it now? If it had been up to him, he would have preferred not to go at all, much less with a woman he had no interest in courting, but figured it would be best not to anger her, so with a faint smile he said, "Of course, Mother, I would be delighted," before squeezing her hand in reassurance and excusing himself.
•••
Back in his room, while he lay on his bed, Edmund thought of his childhood days. Everything had been simpler back then. He went back to a memory of him and Frederick sitting on a branch of a sycamore tree that extended out over the pond beneath. Edmund had tried hanging upside down, but before he could his hand slipped, causing him to fall into the pond and as a result, injuring his leg. Frederick came to visit him everyday after that for a week. He would stay for several hours and entertain him with stories and toys he had built.
We’ve always had a special connection, Edmund thought. One that I didn’t have with anyone else, not even my own mother. And now it’s grown into something more. Something I’ve never felt before.
Something...bad.
He frowned to himself. So bad, in fact, it was sinful and foul and could never, ever be spoken of.
But it was there, this thing, this connection—this feeling. As real as day, it was there. A feeling that ate away at him constantly, yet brought him immeasurable pleasure. He felt it every time he caught sight of Frederick, every time he heard his rich, deep voice, every time he thought of him. The feeling was getting harder and harder to ignore, and that troubled him. It made him feel disgusting. Yet just knowing he’ll get to see Frederick when he woke up the next day made him giddy with delight.
A frustrated sigh left his lips. "I cannot be thinking like this," he spoke aloud. "There must be something very wrong with me," he said, this time his voice a whisper. "Something very, very wro-"
A knock on the door interrupted his thoughts.
“Yes?”
“It’s only me.” The thick, wooden door muffled Frederick's voice. His heart felt ready to jump out of his throat. He sat up, running a hand through his hair.
“Come in, Fred.”
“I hope I’m not being a bother,” he said with a smile.
“Not at all,” Edmund said, looking away. He could not allow himself to look Frederick in the eye.
“I’ve been worried about you.” Frederick closed the door behind him, leaning against it. When Edmund said nothing, he walked across the room and sat on the bed, a little too close for his cousin's liking. Edmund shifted back, hoping to create more space between the two of them.
“Worried? Whatever for?” He asked with feigned bewilderment, still avoiding his fixed gaze. He knew full well that Frederick had picked up on his odd behaviour. Of course he had, Frederick knew him better than he knew himself and that was what frightened him.
“You haven’t been yourself for the past few days.”
He could feel Frederick’s eyes on him, it were as though they were burning holes into his skin. He squirmed in his place, wishing his cousin would look away. The attention proved to be too much for him to handle.
“Ru-ubbish. I... I’ve just been busy, 's’all.”
“Busy!” Frederick gave a laugh. “Take a look at yourself, Edmund! You’re a mess. You have circles under your eyes the size of Jupiter.”
“What is it really?” He said more seriously now, inching closer. “What is it that’s bothering you? You know you can trust me. We’re best friends after all, aren’t we?”
Edmund’s heart was pounding against his chest. He was sure Frederick could hear the dull thud just as well as he could. He looked up slowly and was taken aback by the intensity of Frederick’s gaze. He held his breath, as he looked into those beautiful green eyes and saw what he himself had felt. For a long while they just stared, not daring to blink.
I wonder how his lips would feel against mine... Edmund thought, glancing at his perfectly shaped, pink lips, before returning his attention to those brilliant green orbs. Realising what just went through his mind, Edmund looked away abruptly. Taking in a deep breath, he said, “I think you should leave. It’s late and I’m tired.”
Stunned and hurt by his sudden coldness, Frederick got up and walked out the room, stopping only to say goodnight, before closing the door behind him. As Edmund lay in bed, Frederick leaned against the door outside—both with only one thing on their mind; the other.
“Yes, honey, sit down,” Mrs. Richards patted the seat next to her.
As he took a seat beside his mother, she placed her teacup on the table across of her before turning to face him.
“You know of the ball coming up, yes?”
“Yes, Mother.” Edmund looked at her curiously.
“The Baker girls will be attending, including their eldest, Martha.” She took his hands in hers.
“I would like you to accompany her, Edmund. She is a beautiful, intelligent, and graceful young woman. I’m sure you’ll find her…suitable.”
Edmund was surprised by his mother’s request. She had never interfered in his personal life before, so why do it now? If it had been up to him, he would have preferred not to go at all, much less with a woman he had no interest in courting, but figured it would be best not to anger her, so with a faint smile he said, "Of course, Mother, I would be delighted," before squeezing her hand in reassurance and excusing himself.
•••
Back in his room, while he lay on his bed, Edmund thought of his childhood days. Everything had been simpler back then. He went back to a memory of him and Frederick sitting on a branch of a sycamore tree that extended out over the pond beneath. Edmund had tried hanging upside down, but before he could his hand slipped, causing him to fall into the pond and as a result, injuring his leg. Frederick came to visit him everyday after that for a week. He would stay for several hours and entertain him with stories and toys he had built.
We’ve always had a special connection, Edmund thought. One that I didn’t have with anyone else, not even my own mother. And now it’s grown into something more. Something I’ve never felt before.
Something...bad.
He frowned to himself. So bad, in fact, it was sinful and foul and could never, ever be spoken of.
But it was there, this thing, this connection—this feeling. As real as day, it was there. A feeling that ate away at him constantly, yet brought him immeasurable pleasure. He felt it every time he caught sight of Frederick, every time he heard his rich, deep voice, every time he thought of him. The feeling was getting harder and harder to ignore, and that troubled him. It made him feel disgusting. Yet just knowing he’ll get to see Frederick when he woke up the next day made him giddy with delight.
A frustrated sigh left his lips. "I cannot be thinking like this," he spoke aloud. "There must be something very wrong with me," he said, this time his voice a whisper. "Something very, very wro-"
A knock on the door interrupted his thoughts.
“Yes?”
“It’s only me.” The thick, wooden door muffled Frederick's voice. His heart felt ready to jump out of his throat. He sat up, running a hand through his hair.
“Come in, Fred.”
“I hope I’m not being a bother,” he said with a smile.
“Not at all,” Edmund said, looking away. He could not allow himself to look Frederick in the eye.
“I’ve been worried about you.” Frederick closed the door behind him, leaning against it. When Edmund said nothing, he walked across the room and sat on the bed, a little too close for his cousin's liking. Edmund shifted back, hoping to create more space between the two of them.
“Worried? Whatever for?” He asked with feigned bewilderment, still avoiding his fixed gaze. He knew full well that Frederick had picked up on his odd behaviour. Of course he had, Frederick knew him better than he knew himself and that was what frightened him.
“You haven’t been yourself for the past few days.”
He could feel Frederick’s eyes on him, it were as though they were burning holes into his skin. He squirmed in his place, wishing his cousin would look away. The attention proved to be too much for him to handle.
“Ru-ubbish. I... I’ve just been busy, 's’all.”
“Busy!” Frederick gave a laugh. “Take a look at yourself, Edmund! You’re a mess. You have circles under your eyes the size of Jupiter.”
“What is it really?” He said more seriously now, inching closer. “What is it that’s bothering you? You know you can trust me. We’re best friends after all, aren’t we?”
Edmund’s heart was pounding against his chest. He was sure Frederick could hear the dull thud just as well as he could. He looked up slowly and was taken aback by the intensity of Frederick’s gaze. He held his breath, as he looked into those beautiful green eyes and saw what he himself had felt. For a long while they just stared, not daring to blink.
I wonder how his lips would feel against mine... Edmund thought, glancing at his perfectly shaped, pink lips, before returning his attention to those brilliant green orbs. Realising what just went through his mind, Edmund looked away abruptly. Taking in a deep breath, he said, “I think you should leave. It’s late and I’m tired.”
Stunned and hurt by his sudden coldness, Frederick got up and walked out the room, stopping only to say goodnight, before closing the door behind him. As Edmund lay in bed, Frederick leaned against the door outside—both with only one thing on their mind; the other.