Sharing Pillows and Cold Feet

I yawned and sat up, still not completely awake. God, why do I feel like shit? I rolled over and turned the alarm clock to me: 2:34

Fuck.

I've slept that late? And no one's tried to wake me up? Some friends I have. I frowned as my stomach started to rumble. Food. I need food.

After succeeding to make a bowl of cereal, I sat down to enjoy my Friday cartoons. There's nothing that can get me up now.

"Hey Halvo the door-"

"Holy fuck!" I shrieked, jumping up. "Where did you come from?"

Garrett paused before laughing, "You look like complete hell."

"Thank you." I muttered, "Cause that sure does boost my confidence level."

"Hey, your gay. Doesn't matter." He smirked, "That rhymed!"

"Get out of my house." I grumbled, picking up the remote.

"Technically, it's an apartment."

I scowled at him and crossed my arms. There goes my perfect Friday morning to myself. Garrett's been coming over every day almost, for the past month. He's trying to 'convince' me to get back together with John.

It's not working.

"He's really messed up." Garrett sighed, "It would do us all a big favor if you two just became friends again. You really fucked him up good."

"S'not my fault.."

"Kinda." He shrugged. "He's been wasting away, always drunk. Late one night stands. Always smells funky. His process of getting past you is awful."

"Again, not my fault."

"Yes it is!" He exclaimed, "This is all your fault. Yeah, maybe John did something too. But don't you think he's been through enough already? For Christ sakes, his mother is worried about him. She called Kennedy up the other morning crying!"

Mrs. O'Callaghan is crying.. because of John? Because of me? I sucked in a deep breath before turning and rearranging the pillows.

"You should tell her I’m terribly sorry.." I muttered, "But there's nothing I can do. It's over. John's not mine anymore."

"He was always yours!" He cried out. "Always will be too."

"No," I murmured. "He's lost me."

"Don't act like a fucking movie!"

"This isn't a movie!" I tossed my hands up, "This is a fucking nightmare. Do you not think if I had the chance to go back and change things, that I would?"

"You would?" He whispered, gnawing on his lip. "Then you can! John's at home right now. Drunk out of his mind but still at home. All you have to do is-"

"Nothing." I cut him off. "I can't fix things now. It's over, like I said already. John needs to move on and forget. He's too good to cry over spilled milk."

"What if that milk was something you had to travel miles to get?" Garrett inquired, standing to his feet. "What if you had to fight off thousands of cats to get it? Would you not cry?"

I blinked and swiftly shook my head. "John didn't have to fight for me. I was right there by his side the whole time. All he had to do was say one word and I was there."

"And then you left." Garrett finished. "Like a fucking coward with your tail tucked between your fucking legs. God Halvo, you need to grow the fuck up. John's a damn mess and you're talking out of your mind!"

As soon as the words left his mouth he spun around, storming out. I winced when he slammed the door shut, the walls rattling. An empty sigh left my mouth as I looked around, taking in my surroundings.

Maybe Garrett's right.

____

Ah, yes. Sunday mornings. I forced a petty smile as I stepped into the kitchen, grabbing a glass and the orange juice carton. Maybe today will be relatively normal, maybe.

I yawned and rubbed my forehead, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. I grabbed the remote and plopped down on the couch, watching adventure time.

I bite my lip and looked around, frowning. Why isn't Garrett here? He's always here by now.. What if I scared him off? What if they never talk to me again?

Oh god.

It's okay, I reasoned with myself. It's fine. This is what I wanted. I've fought for everything I wanted and now I finally got it.. Why am I not taking advantage of this?

I glanced around and sighed once more, shaking my head. Maybe I should just take a small nap. That's all I need.

"We can work it out!" John pleaded, "One more chance, please Halvo? Please?"

"John," I starred at him with pity, ruffling his hair. "You need to move on. It's not healthy to be like this for too long. "

"But-

"Eric!"

I shot up from my peaceful slumber and gripped my temple, scowling at Garrett. Thanks to him I know have a raging migraine.

"What now?" I growled.

"John!" Garrett exclaimed, "He's been in a car accident! Kennedy said he's lost alot of blood, we're not sure if he's going to pull through!"

W-what? What does he mean pull through? It's John! He always overcomes everything. He's strong, he can get past this...

"W-what?" I stammered, my breathing growing labored. "What do you mean? He'll be alright!"

"No- Eric." Garrett choked out. "He's really messed up, h-he needs you now."

"O-okay." I nodded, snatching my phone. "Let's go!"

I guess Garrett must've been a little stunned by my eagerness. He was still standing in the same spot, a blank look stretched across his flushed face.

I had to actually drag him into the hospital, my anxiety level rising by the second. What if he's already gone? What if he doesn't want to see me?

What if he dies after he tells me that he doesn't want to see me? I couldn't live with that. I couldn't live with myself.

"H-halvo?"

My heart started hammering at his husky voice, muffled by his grogginess. I froze for a millisecond before glancing at his vibrant green orbs.

"John!"

My voice rang out loud and clear, catching more attention than needed. His eyes lit up as my frantic voice reached him. He stood up, offering a small weak smile.

"John!" I sobbed, flinging my arms around his waist. "I-I’m sorry. I'm so sorry. I l-love you, I couldn't bare the thought of you d-d-dieing and not knowing I'm sorry!"

"Halvo," He cooed, brushing my hair back, "I'm okay, the question is. What in the hell has gotten into you?"

"W-what do you mean?" I questioned in bewilderment, "G-garrett said that-"

That bastard. I untangled myself from him, glaring at the floor. That little fucker. I can't believe he would stood so low to lie and manipulate me!

"Garrett!" I hissed, clenching my fist. "You little bastard, when I get my hands on you I'm going to-"

"Threatening in a hospital?" He teased.

"Garrett!" I pushed my arms forward. I scowled when I realized John was pulling me back, a small smirk tugging at his lips.

"You came here 'cause you thought I was dieing?" He stifled his laughter. "That's sad Halvo, really sad. Did you honestly think I would forgive you so easily, dieing or alive?"

"Y-yeah." I shuffled my feet.

He broke out into a wide grin, shaking his head. "Well, you thought right."

"W-what?"

"I love you." He whispered, pulling me closer. "With all my heart, there's nothing you could ever do you cause me to hate you."

I blinked back tears, casting my gaze downward. After all the hell I've put him through and he still fucking loves me? I glanced back up him, at his shimmering eyes.

"I love you too." I breathed out, running my fingers through his head. He grinned and placed his calloused hands on my hips, squeezing them.

"I'm glad you came to your senses."