One Last Chance

Potter moved forward and drug him up so he was sitting in his desk chair once again. He was close enough to choke, but fortunately for the boy, he was still paralyzed. He tried with all of his strength to break free of the body bind, but it was no use as Har-Potter began unbuttoning his sleeves. His pale flesh came into view and so did his arms.

They were still bruised, infected, and purple looking. He was not surprised as Harry gasped out loud as he took in the sight in front of him. It was a lot to take in for a person who had never delt with this kind of a drug addiction before. Or any, in Potters case.

Potter stared down at his arms, examining them closely with a strange calmness hanging over him. He raised his wand and accioed something underneath his breath. Not even a moment later, he saw phials from his own personal stores zooming toward the boy. He struggled to break away from the bond holding him in place, but there was no use. It was too strong.

Potter had opened one of the phials and he recognized it immediately. Bruise balm. He was angry as the younger boy began rubbing the balm all over each of his bruises. They did not completely disappear, but they faded considerably in a moment's time. Potter applied some sort of Muggle cream he had summoned from upstairs to the infected wounds. By the time he was done, Severus was starting to grow dangerously angry at the boy. He would most likely attack him if the bond broke.

He didn't need the boys help in healing his wounds. He was perfectly capable himself. The fact that he had not treated them should have indicated that he wished to have his arms in that state. That sounded really fucking mental. It was the truth, though. He had reasoned with himself that if he was going to have to go down this path again, he might as well bare the marks that came along with it.

The phials that had been summoned packed themselves away with the flick of Potters wand. He watched as Potter walked around to the front of his desk, facing away from him. "You fucking idiot!" He had turned around in an instant and slammed his fist down onto the desk. "You need to stop. Right now. Do it for me. Do it for Draco. Do it for Remus. Do it for Dumbledore. Do it for my mother. I don't give a damn who you do it for, as long as you fucking stop because this is not okay, Severus! This is bad. Really fucking bad. God damnit you idiot!" Potter continued to rant and rave about his idiocy for what felt like days.

Severus could not wrap his mind around the fact that this was upsetting him so much. They had been livng peacefully together for a few months, but he didn't know that Harry cared this deeply for him. He understood things from his point of view completely. He would be reacting just the same if the situation was the other way around, but probably with more drastic measures.

He was touched at the boys concern as he continued to rant about how he was never allowing him out of his sight again. The concern was not needed, though. It wasn't Harrys body or his life. It was his. He was thirty six years old for Merlins sake! He could make his own decisions about the way he lived his life.

Maybe Harry had a point, though. Maybe he was a fucking idiot. No, not maybe, he was.

This drug had overtaken his life three times now. Once when he was sixteen, once when he was twenty four, and now he was thirty six years old and still falling back into old ways. He was not an idiot, he knew how dangerous this drug was. He knew the damage it was doing to his body every second that it remained in his system. That didn't matter, though.

What mattered was the feeling he got from the heroin entering his bloodstream. What mattered was the way the high took him from his familiar dark place into the unfamiliar light. The drug had become his lifeline over the past few weeks and he wasn't letting it go for anything.

Harry pointed his wand and muttered "Finite". The body bind fully broke and he jumped up as fast as possible, pulling his wand out. He was absolutely livid as he swept across the room and slammed the boy up against the wall.

"You will not speak about this to anybody and I do mean anybody. Not Draco, not Remus, nobody. If I find out you have-" He pressed his wand to the inside of his neck in a threatening manner. "Well, we'll just deal with that when the time comes." He smirked in great satisfaction as Harry nervously gulped and nodded his head up and down.

"Good. Now get out of my sight."

Harry remained standing there, though. He was looking at him in a way. He didn't seem angry, happy, or sad. He could not for the life of him explain the look he was giving him. It was making him extremely uncomfortable. "Promise me-" He said, his voice cracking surprisingly. "Promise you'll stop doing it."

Severus felt his eyes widen at Harrys request. He wanted to tell him that he was not going to stop for anybody or anything, but found that even he didn't have the heart to do so with the way the boy was acting. "I will stop." He promised. No way in hell was he actually stopping, but it was alright to allow Harry to think so for now. He was going to stop. He was. He just didn't know when or how.

He finally re-emerged for dinner that night, feeling like a complete ass for ignoring Remus all day and treating him the way he did at lunch. He walked into the Great Hall and looked up at the staff table. He felt his blood beginning to boil as he did so. That fucking troll Trelawney was sitting in his usual spot, batting her droopy little eyes at Remus. Since when did that woman leave her creepy, pink, perfumed, haven? Never before had he wanted to live up to his Death Eater part and begin ripping a person limb from limb, torturing them to their death.

He felt eyes on him as he realized that he had stopped mid-stride and stared at the staff table in anger. He marched up to the table and came to stand behind the wretch of a woman. Every eye in the Great Hall was watching the display. Oh god, he couldn't wait to hear the rumors that would begin circulating the school. He had totally gone bat shit. Lupin, Trelawney, and Snape had become a threesome. He really hated teenagers with a thriving passion.

"Ahem." He cleared his throat. Remus had already looked up at him with pleading eyes. He probably should have found the entire situation to be amusing, but there was nothing funny at this point. This troll was flirting with what belonged to him. "I believe you are in my seat." She looked up from throwing herself at Remus to study him for a moment. He gave her his best death glare, the one he reserved for first years and until this year, Harry Potter.

"O-of course P-p-p-professor Snape." She stuttered upon seeing how murderous he currently was. She got up and took the seat next to his instead. He sat down next to Remus. The two stared at each other for a moment before he leaned forward and kissed him. It wasn't a life shattering, soul searching kind of kiss. It wasn't a soft, romantic kind of kiss. It was just an "I'm sorry for being a complete asshole." kind of kiss.

It was over in an instant and he felt eyes upon him. Staring at him. Watching him. Judging him. He paid them no attention, not caring what anybody thought anymore. He did take it upon himself to sneak a look at Trelawney who looked shocked and a little embarrassed as well. Good.

He focused his attention back on Remus, waiting for him to say something, anything. The kiss had been his way of apologizing without having to say the words. He hoped that the other man would realize this and accept it. The one thing he wasn't sure if he could ever do was give somebody the satisfaction of admitting he was wrong to their face. Severus was always right and there were absolutely no exceptions to this.

He truly did hope that Remus wasn't too mad at him, but he wouldn't fault him if he was. Remus simply gave him a small smile before offering him the Shepherd's Pie sitting in front of him. It looked like he was forgiven. He scooped out a rather large serving of it, as his high was making him extremely hungry. He poured a glass of Pumpkin Juice to go with it and began eating.

"I missed you." Remus said quietly to his left. He didn't reply for a moment. He really felt like shit now. He had ignored the man he was supposed to love all day, treated him like shit at lunch, and had caused a miniature scene in the Great Hall. He had done all that and his lover had simply whispered that he missed him. Remus really was too good of a man for him.

"And I, you." He whispered back. It was the closest he could allow himself to come to actually saying the real thing. At least it was a step toward becoming the man he wished to be. He wanted to be like Remus, so open with his heart, but he knew it was going to take some time. His whole life had consisted of hiding his every emotion, turning himself into a cold, emotionless, human being.

He had to conceal a genuine grin as he felt Remus begin stroking his wrist underneath the table. He relocated his fork to his right hand and began rubbing his thumb over his knuckles in a loving gesture. He saw the look of surprise that passed over Remus's face as he did so. The other man knew that he thought holding hands was for sentimental old fools.

Well maybe he was turning into a sentimental old fool himself.