Where You Belong

[ZACK'S POINT OF VIEW]

As soon as I closed the door behind me, I took a deep breath before slowly exhaling.

That had gone way smoother than I thought.

I didn't realize it until about a week after Britt had had Mason, but I cared about her... a lot. I'd always known that, but I didn't realize just how deep those feelings ran until one of the guys on tour had seen a picture of her and made a comment about tapping her. I didn't take that too well, and the guys had had to sit me down and spell it out for me.

Ever since I'd come to realize my feelings for her, I couldn't stop thinking of her. She was always on my mind; how she was doing, how Mason was doing, if she was happy, if things were going well for her. I'd counted down the days until I could come home and see her, and in a way, I was beyond ecstatic that I could come home even earlier to see her, despite the current circumstances.

It was as if I'd never left. My spirit picked back up where it'd left off in the first place. I no longer felt half empty, I felt like myself again. I felt like everything was going the way it should've.

Looking back towards the door, I smiled to myself as I thought back to what just happened. I thought about how fast I could feel her heartbeat thumping against my chest, how her lips had fallen open and emitted a soft moan. How amazing her lips felt against mine.

I tried to contain myself as I trudged back downstairs. I noticed that everyone seemed to be sprawled about throughout the living room, kitchen, and patio. While I'd been upstairs, the Berry brothers had shown up, both flanking Val's sides as she held Mason in her arms.

It was clear that he was hungry, because from what I'd heard, he was a fairly even tempered baby. He was easy to calm down and take care of, so if he was this fussy, then either his diaper was gross, or he was hungry.

"Hold on, little man," Matt B grinned down at the wailing infant, "Your mommy's on her way, I'm sure."

That was when all eyes turned to me.

Johnny smirked, "Yeah, Zee. Where is mommy, anyway?"

"Uh, upstairs, I think." I muttered, reaching up a hand and scratching the back of my neck.

"You only scratch your neck like that when you're nervous," Val pointed out sweetly, causing a manic grin to spread across Jimmy's face. "Now what would you be nervous about?"

"And what would your lips be all swollen for?" Lacey mused, sending me a knowing smile.

I groaned, "You guys are speaking in code again."

Michelle giggled, "Are we? Cause I think what we're trying to get across is pretty obvious."

"Yeah, cause you got a little somethin on the side of your neck, bro," Syn smirked widely.

I watched him cautiously, slowly inching a hand up to my neck. Leana shook her head, "Oh no, honey. You won't be able to feel it, you'll need to see it."

With that, she steered me in the direction of one of the decorative mirrors my mom had hung on the wall. I cringed once I saw the bright red mark peeking out from the underside of my jaw, realizing what everyone was hinting at.

The whole room burst into laughter, and I couldn't do anything but smile sheepishly, "Oops."

"Finally! Fucking finally, Baker!" Jimmy howled with laughter, stepping forward and clapping a hand on my back.

"Man, do you know how long I've waited for this day?" Shadows chuckled with a shake of his head, "I knew the first day Brian brought her to practice that you liked her. You might not have seen it then, but I sure as hell could."

"Me too," Val piped up, clinging to Shadows' arm with a dopey grin.

Michelle and Brian both grinned, "And me," they said simultaneously.

I laughed and shook my own head, "So, basically everyone could tell but me? Fucking awesome."

"It's not like you ever wanted to hear it!" Johnny countered, tossing his hand up in the air, "You just ignore us and roll your eyes like a fucking girl."

"Who rolls their eyes like a girl?"

As soon as we Britt's voice drifted across the room, everyone fell silent. I gnawed at my lip rings, hoping to keep my face as straight as possible. I knew if she took one look at me, she'd be able to read me like an open book.

"The, uh, the...the thing--" Shadows answered lamely, rubbing the top of his buzzed head, "Uhh..."

"The thing!" Leana gasped, nodding her head furiously as she looked at Shadows in awe, "Yeah, that's exactly what we were talking about!"

Britt didn't look convinced, "What thing?"

"Girl, you know that...thing we're talking about!" Lacey jumped in quickly with a nervous laugh, "You know, it's about the uh...um, the...the thing!"

Michelle rolled her eyes in her typical fashion, "Everyone's talking about you and Zack sucking each other's face off."

"Michelle!" Val hissed, elbowing her twin. Michelle shrugged and looked elsewhere.

I looked to Britt for her reaction. At first she her eyes widened, but then she seemed to smile sheepishly with a shrug of her own shoulders, "Y'all got me."

"I KNEW IT! I FUCKING KNEW IT!" Jimmy howled.

Syn punched his shoulder, pointing to Mason in Britt's arms, "Don't freak him out, man."

Mason still had tear tracks on his cheeks and was whimpering, and my guess was that he still hadn't been fed, but she'd simply calmed him down some. An awkward silence began to settle in the room, and everyone quickly found something to do. Britt dismissed herself after saying hi to the others and giving them quick hugs. I watched as she walked into the next room, presumably to feed Mason in privacy.

"I knew it would happen eventually."

I looked over and saw Val smiling cheekily at me. I rolled my eyes but wrapped an arm around her shoudlers anyway, pulling her in for a quick hug, "Yeah, yeah."

"Honestly," she continued excitedly, "I told you that the first day Brian invited her over for band practice! You couldn't keep your eyes off her the entire time."

"In all honesty," I sighed loudly, looking at my shoes, "I think I always knew. How I felt about her, I mean. She was always more special to me than the rest, I just didn't piece everything together until now...somehow."

Val chuckled softly with a nod, "I knew that, too. Just about everyone did, even your own parents. Maria's been hinting for the two of you to get together for years!"

I snorted, "I don't see how I missed that before."

"I don't know, but I'm sure you won't be able to miss it now; she'll never let this one go."

I groaned, "Val, she's not even my girlfriend! All we did was kiss!"

She smirked at me, looking so much like Michelle at that moment, "But you want more than just a kiss from her, right?"

I sighed, "I don't think either of us is ready for a relationship. We've both been burned in the past, and I know that right now, Mason is her top priority--"

"Ah, excuses!" Leana flapped her hand dismissively, popping into the room, taking a seat on my other side, "You know each other better than you know yourselves. You know how to take care of each other, look out for another. You'd be perfect together!"

"Lee, I don't wanna wear her down with the thought of another relationship. I know how hard this has been on her, and I don't wanna push her into anything she doesn't wanna do," I reasoned, looking at her seriously.

"Who's to say that she doesn't want a relationship?" Lacey asked, walking in with a beer and making herself comfortable on the armchair in the corner.

"Oh, so she's recently said that she does?" I asked sarcastically, already knowing the answer to that one.

"Well, no..." Lacey mumbled slowly.

"Exactly!" I exclaimed, "That's the point I'm trying to make--"

"Yeah, but she'd want a relationship if she knew it was with you!" Lee protested, eyebrows furrowing in the middle of her forehead. I looked at her disbelievingly and she stomped her foot like a child.

So much like Jimmy.

"Oh my God, Zacky, you've got her already!" Michelle huffed loudly, walking by with a roll of her eyes, "Now reel her the fuck in before someone else snatches her away."

I cocked an eyebrow after her while Val shrugged, "Well, she's got a point."

Yeah, she actually did.

***

"You what?" Lacey gaped at Johnny, leaning forward in her seat as he told her one of his many wild stories from tour, "You never told me that over the phone!" she huffed, causing Johnny to smile sheepishly at her.

I shook my head before looking to the side. Jimmy was getting the same treatment from Leana.

"Baby, you realize how many times you've been arrested in the past year for public indecency? You've got one more time to get throw in jail over something stupid and we won't be having sex for a month."

Jimmy's jaw dropped, "A month?"

Leana nodded, "A month, babe."

"B-b-but...but w-why?" he stammered, looking at her incredulously.

"Cause one day you're gonna land yourself in there and not be able to get yourself back out." she answered simply before turning away from him and striking up a conversation with Michelle. Shadows and I snickered to ourselves, while Syn's eyes stayed glued to his girlfriend's chest.

The fucker has no shame, I tell you.

"ABRA KADABRA!" Johnny screeched suddenly, a loud splash sounding from the pool. I exchanged a confused glance with Lacey, who only shrugged.

JB chuckled, "You know, sometimes, I really wonder about that kid."

"Sometimes, I wonder about you." Matt B answered with a smirk, laughing when JB gutted him pretty good.

"I wonder about all of you," I muttered so that only Shadows could hear. He gave out a throaty laugh before leaning forward, taking a drink of his beer while watching Valary nibble on some fruit. "Been a while?"

"You have no idea, Vengeance."

By the tone of his voice, I was sure he was right, "No comment on that one, dude."

Just then, Val piped up, "Is Britt still inside?"

Yes, and what the fuck is she in there doing?

I smiled a little, "I think she is."

"She's still feeding Mason?" Syn cocked an eyebrow, checking his wristwatch, "It's been over an hour."

The girls exchanged a few glances before giggling together, something that I found completely weird and kind of awkward. I watched curiously as Leana whispered something to Michelle, who whispered something back. Lacey and Val were also chattering back and forth under their breaths.

Jimmy rolled his eyes, "You ladies better spit it out, or I'll shake it out for you," he said in a taunting, sing song voice. Leana's eyes widened and she shook her head furiously, something that told me he's used that threat on her before. Poor Lee.

"Well, we can't tell you," Val cut in with a giggle, standing on her feet and walking back towards the patio door, "But we can show you."

Leana was the first to hop up and grab hold of my hand, "C'mon!"

I think she'd officially lost it. I looked back at Jimmy, who simply shrugged and followed suit as the girls shushed everyone and tiptoed in the house.

"Why the fuck are we tiptoeing like idiots?" Brian muttered, causing Michelle to turn and throw him a warning look. With a sigh and heave of his shoulders, he continued walking beside her without another word.

Silently, we trekked inside the house and through the kitchen, leading out to the living room. Lacey sprinted forward into the den, which was the next room over, and giggled to herself before excitedly waving everyone over. Curiously, I stepped forward and strolled over to the doorway where she stood, cocking an eyebrow as she placed a finger over her lips.

"What is it?" I asked, looking at her skeptically.

"Shh," she shushed me again, before turning and pointing inside the room.

We each stepped forward and crept into the room for whatever reason. The girls cooed and giggled as they each walked inside, and the rest of us followed suit. My frown quickly turned up into a grin when I saw Britt curled up onto the sofa, head leaned back and fast asleep, soft snores sounding from her lips. She was slightly exposed, as one strap of her top was pulled to the side in order for Mason to feed. From where we stood, all we could see was Mason's dark tuft of curly hair, which brought a smile to everyone's face.

"She's always so tired," Val smiled softly, "Whenever she feeds him, this ends up happening Besides, she says breastfeeding is exhausting."

"How the hell is it exhausting?" Brian asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

"Cause it's painful as all hell," came Britt's mumble. I turned my head towards her and smiled to see that her eyes were still closed, yet she she was clearly just waking up from how groggy her voice had sounded. "And it takes everything in me not to scream bloody murder since he just started teething."

I cringed. That didn't sound so pleasant.

"How're you feeling now?" Michelle asked, stepping around me so that she could get closer to her friend, placing a hand on her shoulder.

With a yawn, she replied, "I'm okay. Still tired, but less tired than before, obviously."

The others slowly trailed back out of the room, talking about babies. Val and Leana were already pestering Shadows and Jimmy for children of their own, while Brian and Johnny placed bets on who would be the first to get knocked up.

Turning back to Brittany, I slowly approached her side and sat down, "You're a natural"

She smiled softly, eyes wandering back down to the infant in her arms, "I'm okay, I guess. I try."

Her smile awoke something in me. I wasn't quite sure what it was, but it had me feeling weird...different. As cliche and lame as it sounded, it was as if everything around us had stopped, and the only thing I could see in front of me was her and the whimpering infant in her arms.

Really weird.

Before I knew it, my lips were attached to hers, savoring the very taste of them. I felt her tense for a moment before she relaxed against me, almost melting into my touch. I was careful not to crush Mason between us, angling her body so that I could reach her better. A soft moan left her mouth as soon as I parted her lips, and I smirked as I felt the quick shiver that surged through her body just then.

She'd always been this way, ever since I'd first known her. She was naturally extremely comfortable with me, and her body had always had an involuntary response to mine, regardless of how innocent the contact. I wasn't even sure if she noticed it half the time.

Just like the first time I'd kissed her, time just seemed to stand still. I wasn't sure how many minutes had passed as our tongues danced together. I took my time, deciding not to completely ravish her no matter how badly I wanted to. The quiet sighs she emitted made my skin tingle, hairs standing up on end. I knew I had to pull away from her before we both got carried away.

"That's the second time you've kissed me today," Britt breathed, eyes fluttering shut as I trailed butterfly kisses down the side of her neck, "Why is that?"

"Why is what?" I mumbled gruffly, taking note of the whimper that left her just as I kissed the underside of her jaw. With a smirk, I lightly teased her skin with my tongue for a brief moment.

"Why are you doing this?" she moaned, tilting her head back so that I had more access to her skin.

I smiled, detaching my lips from her neck and pressing them to hers, "Because I've always wanted to; it just took me a while to realize it." I answered honestly, gazing into her dark eyes.

She frowned, "Always?"

It was clear that things weren't adding up for her, and that made me chuckle.

"Britt, think about it," I urged her, "We've always been close and there for each other through everything. You know be better than I know myself, and you say the same thing in regards to me all the time. I'd do anything for you and Mason, and you've always held my best interests at heart."

She smiled then, no doubt sifting through all of our childhood memories, "You're right."

I smiled too and continued, "I know you've hurt in the past just as I have. I know your sole focus is Mason, and I understand. But I feel this...crazy fucking feeling when I'm with you, and I can't ignore it anymore."

She frowned ever so slightly, "What are you saying, Zack?"

I sighed, breaking from our gaze before returning to it once more, "I want to be with you. I understand if you wanna take things slow or just need some time to think, but," I broke off, nervously running a hand through my hair as I avoided her gaze, "Just, please don't shut me out. I don't think I could take that."

It was a long time before she spoke. I thought my heart was either going to explode or just thump right out of my fucking chest. For once I was scared. I was honestly fucking terrified of the answer she would give me. I couldn't even look her in the eyes, so I looked down at Mason. He was wide awake, looking between his mother and I in wonder as she adjusted her top.

The silence was agonizing. But when she finally spoke, everything stopped.