Whiskey and Cigarettes

Sunday, September 4, 2010

The rest of the week, I intentionally ignored my friends. There was no doubt in my mind that Danny had told Lux and Rex about the other day, and I was positive they had a million questions. It wasn't hard to avoid them, and I didn't have to lie about why I wasn't spending time with them. Percy was continuously inviting me out to work parties, to hang out with his friends, and on a couple dates. Normally, I wouldn't have agreed to any of it other than maybe the work parties, because Percy wasn't really my type. However, I was desperate for a way out, and he was attractive, so I tried hard to convince myself that he wasn't as cheesy as I really thought.

The Sunday after, though, I didn't have any plans. Apparently, Sundays were Percy's recuperating days. I had planned to just walk around town all day, go to the mall, the movies, out to eat. This time, I was going to lie and say I had plans with Percy. When I walked out of my room, freshly showered and fully dressed, I heard voices coming from the living room. It sounded like the whole gang was out there, talking in whispers. I crept over to the top of the stairs, sitting down on the top step. They wouldn't be able to see me from the living room, but I could hear everything they were saying.

"She's been avoiding us lately," Rex whispered.

"It's probably my fault, I'm sorry." Danny sounded confused and tired.

"Don't be. It's not your fault," Lux spoke up. "Bay has had a hard life, and she does this when she feels vulnerable."

"Sometimes she goes back to normal on her own, but others you have to force her," Rex added.

"What exactly is she doing?" Sam asked.

"Pushing us away, because we know too much." Lux responded.

"So how do we get her back?" Ben asked.

"By having her give us the entire truth," Rex replied. "It sounds strange, but the anxiety she's feeling from us possibly finding out everything is the reason why she's pushing us away. Once she tells us the truth and sees that we won't think of her any different, she'll start to feel more comfortable."

I rolled my eyes and pushed myself off the stairs, walking back to my room. They were completely right, but I wasn't about to let them dig into my life. Not all of them anyway.

I decided to lock my door and sneak out my bedroom window, in hopes of avoiding them for the rest of the day. I lowered myself down as close to the ground as possible, before letting go of my window sill, walking away with only a possible bruise on my hip that would form later on.

After walking around LA, sightseeing, eating lunch at a restaurant with a million of bright lights and half naked waitresses, and watching a movie in an extravagant movie theater, I found myself sitting on a bench near a fountain, dialing Percy's number. In retrospect, I knew it was a bad idea. I was only leading this guy on, but he was my only friend outside of my group at the house.

"Hey," he spoke with a sleepy voice.

"Hey, did I wake you up?" I asked, watching a few teenagers skip and dance around the fountain.

"Yeah, I guess I fell asleep watching TV," he explained. I could hear him rummaging through his jean pockets, most likely for a cigarette.

"Anyway, I was calling to ask if you wanted to come to our party tonight."

"Sure," I could hear the smile in his voice. I hadn't asked him to do anything with me yet, just agreed to hang out with him all week. I felt slightly guilty, but guilt felt a whole lot better to me than being badgered with questions and having to tell my friends the truth.

"Okay. Pick me up at The Grande, and I'll show you where we live." We both hung up our phones, and I walked a block to where the theater was.

When I showed up to the party with Percy by my side, I received a lot of strange looks from my friends, but the strangest one from Danny, and I started to feel even more guilty. However, I brushed it off, letting Percy hang over me all night. He drank a lot. I lost count after ten beers, and he became an extremely touchy, huggy drunk after eight.

I let him hug me and kiss my cheek, even though I gave him a weird look. I let him force me to dance with him and take a walk around the block, holding his hand. I let him tell me I was pretty, and I blushed a deep red. Not because I liked him or wanted him to be like this with me or say those things to me. Just because I felt bad saying no, and I almost wanted Lux, Rex, Danny, Ben, and the others to believe that I was okay with all of this. If I kept pushing Percy away, they'd ask twice as many questions.

"Where's your room?" Percy whispered to me, leaning up against me, which forced me against the wall.

"Upstairs," I replied, hoping he'd feel to drunk to walk up the steps.

"Let's go," He grabbed my right hand with his left, pulling me up the stairs and asked which door.

I pointed, and he turned the knob. Inside, I busied myself with looking for a hoodie, pretending I was cold. He sat on my bed, watching. "What are you doing?" he asked.

"Looking for a hoodie."

"You cold?"

"Yep."

"Then get under the covers," he grinned, winking at me.

"Look, Percy." He was the first person I was going to start telling the truth to.

"Shh," he smiled, grabbing both of my hands in his and pulled me down on the bed. "There's nothing to say. I know how you feel about me."

I tried to protest, shaking my head, but before I knew it, his thin chapped lips were on mine. When I pulled away to protest again, his lips quickly moved to my neck and down my chest, his fingers fumbling with my shirt. "Percy. Percy. Percy." I called his name a few times, trying to get his attention, and I was starting to get frustrated and almost scared, because he wouldn't listen to me. "Percy, get the fuck off."

He stopped and looked me in the eye, confusion written all over his face. "Don't be a prude, Bay. You've been dropping hints all week for this. Don't play hard to get now." And with that, his lips were on mine again.

I brought my hands up to his shoulders and pushed with all the strength I could muster up. Percy fell with a loud thud to the floor, and in seconds, my door swung open. James, Rex, and Danny stood in my door way. James and Rex were staring at Percy laying on the floor with shock. Danny's eyes bore into mine, and I immediately started crying. Not because of Percy, because he was drunk, and I could forgive him. Not because of Danny trying to pry into my life, because I knew he just cared, as did the rest of my friends. I cried, because every bad memory I had was flooding my mind, and I knew in the morning, I'd have to tell everyone what the hell has been going on with me.