Temporary Bliss

I guess you could say I was playing ‘hard to get.’ I kept blowing Michael off, trying to make him think I was less interested in him; truth is I was dying to spend time with him. And to be honest, it didn’t look like it bothered him at all. I was so frustrated with him that I just wanted to scream. I hated him so much, but at the same time I didn’t hate him at all. I don’t know if that makes any sense at all, but it’s the truth.

I hadn’t hung out with Michael in three weeks, I only saw him at work. It was really starting to drive me crazy. Especially the feelings I was getting towards him, this wasn’t supposed to happen; I wasn’t supposed to start feeling a little bit jealous of the other girls. I picked up the phone and called my brother, John.

“Charlotte. I hope you‘re aware its one in the morning here…” he groaned, sleep evident in his voice.

“I know, but this is important!”

He sighed and I heard him move around, probably sitting up. “Alright, what‘s up?”

“If I tell you, you can‘t judge me or tell anyone or lecture me or anything. Promise?”

“Yeah, yeah. I won‘t. What‘s wrong?” he said, sounding more awake.

I took in a shaky breath, “I‘m cheating on Cameron.”

I said it out loud for the first time. Tears quickly escaped my eyes and I bit my lip to try and stop them.

“Charlotte…” he sighed.

“I‘m such a whore, John. Cameron doesn’t deserve to be hurt like this…he‘s such an amazing guy, the kind of guy every girl dreams of having, and here I am not even appreciating it. I‘m going behind his back with some other guy. I‘m a whore.” I babbled, tears escaping my eyes and escalading down my face. I could feel my heart aching and a sick feeling in my stomach.

“Charlotte, calm down, okay? Just breathe.” he said in a quiet and soothing voice. I closed my eyes and took keep breaths in through my nose and out through my mouth. “Wanna tell me how this started?”

I nodded, though he couldn’t see. “Michael, the guy you saw me with at the diner…he kissed me at work long before Christmas. We didn’t do anything after that, we just hung out, and then the night you saw me at the diner…we kissed then. And-and I knew I had feelings for him, and I told him and he said already knew.” I started.

“Does he know about Cameron?”

“Yeah…”

“Okay…and does this Michael guy like you?”

“As much as someone like him can like someone, yes. He‘s a complete jerk, and totally not a gentleman. He‘s always talking to a different girl. I don’t even know why I like him.” I sighed.

John chuckled, “I guess you like the bad guys now…is there more to the story?”

“I-I slept with him.” I said quietly, shutting my eyes.

I heard his breathing change. Oh this was not good, not one bit. “God damn it Charlotte! You‘re eighteen!” he yelled.

I pulled the phone away from my ear and I could still hear him yelling. This only caused me to cry harder realizing how much I messed up. “I‘m sorry, John.” I knew I let him down.

“Sorry doesn’t fucking cut it, Charlotte! You could be pregnant! Did you use protection? You can‘t be having sex at eighteen!”

I stayed silent, mainly because I was crying too much to even talk.

He sighed, calming down. “Charlotte, I’m sorry for yelling at you. I can‘t prevent you from doing things, it‘s your choice. Just be careful if you ever do it again, okay? But please, please don‘t do it again, not anytime soon.” I nodded my head, not saying anything. “What else happened?”

“Nothing, I‘ve just been avoiding him a little. But I really wanna hang out with him again.” I sighed.

“You‘ve gotta tell Cameron. If you don’t feel the same for him you have to break it off…the longer you wait the harder it‘s going to be and the more hurt Cameron will be.”

“But-” I started but he cut me off.

“No, Charlotte. It‘s your final decision, but if you want my advice, you need to break things off with Cameron, and hope that Michael is still there. Or stay with Cameron and stop contact with Michael.”

“Okay. I‘ll let you go now. Thanks.” I whispered.

“Let me know what happens, and call me if you need anything else, okay?”

“yeah, I will.”

“And Charlotte, don‘t beat yourself up too much, you can‘t help if you fall in love with someone else.”

“it just sucks.”

“You‘ll be okay. You‘re my sister and even though this wasn’t the best thing you could do, I still love you.”

I chuckled, “Now you‘re making me cry harder. Night, John.”

“Good evening to you.” he laughed. “I’ll talk to you later.” he said then hung up.

Oye. This was going to suck.

After getting off of the phone with John I laid in bed, not wanting to leave my room since I knew my eyes were red.
A while later I heard clinking of pots and pans from downstairs, I ignored it and finished up some homework. An hour or so later I finished and walk downstairs expecting to see my mom in the kitchen. But she wasn’t. It was Cameron. My heart sank as I remembered what John said.

He looked up, startled, and when he saw me his face lit up, he walked over to me and engulfed me in a hug. He pulled back and gave me a quick peck on the lips.

“Hi, I didn’t know you were here?” I said, confused.

“I know, because it was a secret, I have a surprise for you.” he said as he led me over to the table.

I smiled, “I like surprises.”

He kissed my cheek, “I know you do.”

“Wait, where are my parents?”

“They went out to dinner.” I nodded in understanding as Cameron grabbed something out of the microwave. “Cover your eyes!”

I put my hands in front of my eyes, “Alright, they‘re closed.”

“No peeking!”

“I‘m not!” I laughed.

I heard him set a plate down in front of me, “Alright, open your eyes.” he said quietly, sitting down in the chair next to me.

I opened my eyes and saw a plate with a taco lying on it, but that wasn’t it…the word ‘Prom?’ was spelt out in salsa. I shot my head in Cameron’s direction looking at him with wide eyes, a big grin on my face.

He was smiling just as big; blushing a little too. “Well…what do you say? Wanna go to prom with me?” he asked, being all bashful.

I nodded my head and wrapped my arms around his neck, “Yes, I‘d love to Cameron!”

He let out a breath of air, “Good.” he leaned in and gave me another kiss. I held his face there a little longer as I kissed him back.

“Caroline is going with Zach, obviously. So you two can pick out dresses together.” he smiled.

I nodded, “Can‘t wait.” I kissed him one last time and then we both started eating.

“So did you make this?” I asked.

He nodded and grinned, “Sure did!”

“All of it?” I raised an eyebrow.

“Yes ma‘am!”

“It‘s very yummy!”

“I‘m glad you like it.” he winked.

After dinner we decided to go out for ice cream so we hopped in his car and drove to the nearest ice cream shop.

His hand rested on the small of my back as we looked up at the menu, “Know what you‘re getting?” he asked.

“I just want a vanilla cone.” I smiled.

“You know you can get whatever you want…are you sure that‘s what you want?” he smiled.

I nodded, giving him a quick kiss, “Yes, I‘m sure.” we got up to the register and Cameron immediately pulled out his money.

I put my hand over his “You‘re not paying. You always pay and I feel bad.”

“I‘m paying. I‘m your boyfriend.” he smiled.

I shook my head, “No, Cam. I‘ll pay this time.”

“You‘re not paying for mine.” he laughed.

“Well you‘re not paying for mine.”

“Yes. I. am.” he stated firmly, a smile on his face. “I want to, I really, really want to.”

I sighed, “We‘ll talk about this later.” he grinned triumphantly and kissed my forehead.

Maybe I could forget about Michael and stay with Cameron, he's better for me anyway.