I'd lie&wait forever.

I was running, my throat burned with a dry feeling, a small layer of sweat had gathered on my skin. Where was I?

I was in an ally, running, but what from? I couldn't stop, no matter how hard I tried. My body ached with a new found soreness, a feeling of dehydration filling up my body.

I was running from something, but what? Who?

“Mel?” The voice came from everywhere, the brick walls around me, the ground the sky. “Mel, wake up!”

I wanted to fall to the ground and cry, I was scared, I was bring hunted,

“Mel wake up!”

I sat up with a sudden jolt, my eyes connecting with hazel ones. I could feel the sweat sliding down my forehead. My hands flew to my face, covering it as soft sobs came from me.

“Hey, hey, Mel it's okay, it was just a dream.” Frank's soothing voice filled my ears, I felt his arms grab me and pulled me into his lap. He wrapped his arms around me in a protective way, placing his chin on my head. “It's okay Melody, I'm here, it was a dream.”

After a minute of Frank rocking me I calmed down, I wasn't even sure why I was so upset after that dream, it just sent a sudden fear down my spine.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Frank asked as I slid myself from his lap to sit on my bed.

“Not really,” my throat itched with the dryness I felt in my dream. I pushed myself off the bed, stretching out. I didn't feel like I had slept at all, I felt exhausted. My muscles hurt, I felt as though I just got done running a marathon.

“What time is it?” I asked, looking out the window to see darkness had settled in.

“1 in the mourning,” Frank laid back at my bed, staring up at the ceiling.

“Is everyone still here?”

“Yeah, Gerard is staying in your guest bedroom. Mikey and Ray are downstairs watching TV still but I think Ray's asleep.” I looked at Frank to see he was closing his eyes, letting out a yawn as he finished what he had to say.

“You sleeping in here?” He didn't answer me, but I knew his silence was a yes. I walked out of my room and down the stairs. Ray was on the couch letting out soft snores, someone had draped a bracket on his shoulders. Mikey was no where to be found though.

I went into the kitchen, getting a glass of water from the tap, soothing my dry throat.

With my glass of water in hand, I slipped on a pair of shoes so I could go outside and get some fresh air.

I pushed the front door opened and jumped at the sight of Mikey sitting on my pourch.

“Hey,” Mikey spoke softly, something unknown in his voice.

“How long have you be out here?” I slid into a sitting position beside him, not looking at his face, just staring off into the distance with him.

“Not long,” we sat in silence for a long time, both of us staring out into the moon. Our silence was comforting though. This is what I loved about Mikey, sometimes silence is just what you need.

“Are you going to leave?” Mikey said, he sounded unsure of himself.

“I don't know.” Even I wasn't sure what was going to happen. Maybe I would stay here forever.

Mikey looked over towards me, pulling my eyes away from the sky and looking into his beautiful spotted eyes.

“I'm going to miss you,” Mikey's voice was soft, “when we leave.”

“I'm going to miss you too.” We stared at each other for a long moment before Mikey leaned forward placing a small kiss on my lips. I could feel my heart speed up as Mikey pulled away.

“I've wanted to do that again. Ever since we kissed goodbye 2 years ago.” I felt my heart swim a little.

I slid my body closer to Mikey, resting my head on his shoulder as we went back to silence. Mikey wrapped his arm around my waste, pulling me closer. I closed my eyes, relaxing my body against Mikey. I felt safe here, like I fit.

“You're going to change the world with your music Mikey.” I whispered, confidently because I knew it was true.

“Will you wait for me?”

I couldn't answer him, I didn't have an answer. I couldn't be with Mikey, we weren't destined to be together because none of this was real. It was never was, it never will be.

When I didn't speak, Mikey pulled away from me, standing up. I didn't want to look at his face, but I had to. He was crushed.

“I'm sorry Mikey.....but I can't. I can't wait forever.”

I heard the door open and click shut, an immediate feeling of guilt washed over me.

“I'm sorry Mikey.” I whispered into the night.

The next few days went by fast. My dreams continued, getting worse each night.

Mikey avoided me while Gerard, Ray and Frank spent ever single moment with me. I went to visit Mikey at one point with Gerard. Gerard said he was really worried about him, but Mikey wouldn't tell him what was wrong. When we went to his house, Mikey had his door locked and wouldn't let us in no matter how much we knocked.

The last time I saw Mikey was the night they left to go off.

That was the night I woke up.

I knew that night, when they left it would be my last night here. What was left to keep me here? Not them.

My first goodbye was to Gerard. He grabbed my hands, pulling me into a hug.

“Don't give up Gerard. You're going to change the world. Just stay fighting.” I whispered in his ears, we pulled away and Gerard gave me a nod. “It won't be easy, but your going to save lives. I know it.” Gerard had tears in the corner of his eyes and I almost did too, I could feel the choke locking into my throat but fought it off.

I moved on to Ray, reminding him how amazing he was at guitar. We joked around for a few moments, before hugging. “Your a good fucking friend Ray.”

“I love you Mels,” I smiled, holding him tighter.

“I love you too Ray.” I pulled back and moved to Frank who held out his arms with a giant grin on his face.

“Don't kill yourself on stage.” I laughed as we hug.

“I'll try not too, but I can't promise that.” We pulled away and we smiled at each other for a moment.

“Go rock those motherfuckers world.” He nodded and I turned to look at Mikey.

Mikey was reserved, still not wanting to talk to me.

“I'm sorry Mikey.” I said under my breath as we looked at each other. He pulled me into a hug but we were both very tensed. “Will you wait for me?” I asked into his ear.

“I can't.” It stung a little bit, but I understood. We were never supposed to be together.

“I love you Mikey, I do.”

“I love you too,” we held each other close, knowing in our hearts that tonight would be our final goodbye.

We pulled away and I watched as the five boys climbed into their van, driving off into the New Jersey night. I let the tears flow as they turned out of view.

I got in my car and went home, climbing into bed as soft sobs came out of me. The world of sleep enveloped me and a soft beeping sound filled my ears.

Goodbye Mikey.