Subtitles and Saturday Nights

As he pulled the DVD from the white and blue plastic bag, Logan’s features squinted up into an exaggerated grimace.

“Not again,” he sighed, throwing in a roll of his deep brown eyes for emphasis. “Kandi, I am so tired of watching these movies.” But his gestures didn’t coincide with his words, his lips curling into a laugh as he settled into the couch cushion, handing over the DVD.

The three infamous faces on the cover stared up at her as she opened the case, kneeling down to place the disc into the DVD player.

“I can’t help it,” she said, her back still turned away. “I’m an addict. Plus, it’s kind of your fault for being too lazy to go out and rent the movie.”

“ I guess you’re right,” he admitted, allowing his head to loll back into the couch. “Apparently if I don’t want to get stuck watching Twilight, I have to make the drive to Blockbuster in rush hour traffic.”

“It’s not Twilight, it’s Eclipse, so if you’re going to talk shit, at least get your facts straight first,” she jabbed back as she grabbed the remote from the space beside him and sat down.

He groaned dramatically but wrapped his arm around her shoulders, a shallow sigh escaping his lips as she snuggled up against him. “Do you have any popcorn? Can’t have movie night without the popcorn.”

“I don’t know, Autum might have some. I don’t like it. You can go look around in the cabinets and see.”

Logan’s face twisted into a look of fake disgust. “You don’t eat popcorn? What’s wrong with you? First the cheesy vampire movies and now popcorn? I just don’t think we can continue this relationship.”

She gave his chest a playful shove as a grin spread across her face. “Shut up, and don’t even get me started on popcorn. It’s gross, it gets stuck in your teeth, the list goes on.”

“Whatever,” he replied, inhaling as he pulled himself up off the couch. “I’m gonna find some popcorn.”

As she lazily skipped past the previews, Kandi could hear her boyfriend rummaging through the kitchen in search of his perfect movie-watching snack. His search must’ve been successful because the shuffling was quickly followed by a series of beeps as his finger jabbed at the microwave buttons.

“I take it Autum had some popcorn stashed away?”

“Yup.” As she looked over at him, she could see the glimmer of satisfaction in his deep brown eyes and the arrogant smirk that lingered on his lips as the warm glow that radiated from the microwave softened his fair skin.

For once on a Saturday night, they had decided to skip club hopping with their friends for a more relaxed night spent in front of the television in the apartment Kandi and her best friend shared.

She heard the soft rip as he tore the bag open, filling the space with steam and the trademark buttery smell of popcorn.

“Can you dim the lights when you come through?”

Her request was answered as the room eased into darkness before Logan plopped down on the couch beside her, the scent of the popcorn even stronger.

“Want some?” he asked, shoving the bowl in her face as his teeth cracked the kernels.

“No, thanks.”

He rolled a cold bottle onto her lap, the pink liquid illuminated by the flickers of light coming from the screen. “I thought you might want one.”

As she twisted the cap off, she gazed over at him. “Thanks.”

When the menu screen finally came up, her thumb pressed the large play button in the middle of the remote, and as her touch felt around for the volume, the music drifting from the speakers immediately ceased.

“I think you pressed mute,” Logan commented as his hand dug deeper into the plastic bowl.

Her eyes squinted in the dark as she struggled to read the tiny, white, partially rubbed-off letters.

“Just leave it like this. We can still read the subtitles,” he joked, and she shot him a glare. “Actually, it would be nice not to have to hear Kristen Stewart’s annoying voice.”

He was right, but he refused to stop there.

“The entire movie is just like, ‘I love you, but I’m dangerous’ and ‘Oh, you should be with me because I’m a werewolf and not a vampire.’”

She couldn’t help but laugh at his expression. “They should’ve cast you in this movie. You’d make a great Edward, all pale and shit.”

Logan pretended to contemplate the idea, his butter-soaked fingers reaching up to absentmindedly stroke his clean-shaven chin. “I kinda think I’d be a better Jacob, I mean, look at all of this.” He jerked the hem of his gray v-neck up to reveal his barely defined abs.

“Oh yeah, very impressive.”

“Don’t worry, I haven’t left you out of my remake,” he laughed, easing his arm back over her shoulders. “With that one acting class under your belt, you’d probably make a better Bella than K-Stew.”

“Aw, thanks,” she teased as her hands ran along the soft cotton that covered his chest. Her gaze shifted back to the tired images on the screen, and a sigh automatically escaped her lips. “So…let’s do this.”

“Do what?”

“You know…” her voice trailed off. “You play Edward, Jacob, whatever, and I’ll play Bella.”

His syrupy eyes seemed to glitter in the dark. “Alright, I’m down. What should we do, just read the subtitles?”

Her shoulders shrugged. “I don’t know. You’re the professional here.”

His fingers raked through his disheveled espresso locks as a boyish grin made its way onto his lips. “Um, okay. “

His eyes darted around the room in search of something he wasn’t sure of yet, but when his stare fell upon the sage green snuggie slung over the back of the couch, his expression lit up.

“Okay,” he began as he tossed the soft material to the carpet at their feet, easing down onto it as his hands smoothed out the creases. “We’re hanging out in this here meadow.” His fingers tapped against the space beside him, and Kandi got the message, stretching out across the floor as she propped herself up on her elbows. “And you’re reciting Frost because you’re oh so well-read.”

“Blah, blah, fire and ice, blah blah blah,” she joked as she pretended to read from an invisible book. “Was that okay?”

“It was perfect,” he said with an enthusiastic grin before his eyes rolled back up at the screen. “Okay, so now I’m lying on the ground like this.” Logan shifted onto his back as his stare kept wandering back towards the screen. “And you’re on top of me like so.”

Kandi sidled over to him on her knees, carefully straddling his waist as she leaned in closer, trying to mimic the position on the screen. “And you keep begging me to marry you for like, ten minutes, but I continually say no.”

“Kandi, will you marry me?” he asked in the most cheesy, romantic voice he could manage. His teeth were clenched in a perfect gleaming line to keep himself from laughing.

“No Logan, I will not marry you because you only want to drink my life juice. That’s just not cool.”

“Okay, we’ve got another nine minutes of this to go,” he sighed. A faint smile appeared on his lips as his fingers trailed up her back, gently twirling around locks of her hair.

“This is all pretty boring,” she replied as the scene faded into the next. “Let’s skip to a good part. Are you ready to be Jacob?”

His lips parted for a moment as more excitement seeped into his features. “Yeah, hold on a minute.”

Logan was up on his feet in an instant, walking quickly towards the bathroom. Kandi could hear the sound of water running as she rolled onto her back, watching the ceiling fan blades whip around above her.

It didn’t take very long for Logan to return, gray v-neck discarded somewhere along the way, and she couldn’t help but laugh at his stance, at the suggestive way he cocked his eyebrow at her. As he strutted over, he patted his bicep, drawing her attention to the still-damp temporary tattoo of a shark on his arm. The image wavered as he flexed his muscles.

“Oh my God, where did you even…?” she managed to choke out in between bursts of laughter.

His expression didn’t budge as he took a seat beside her. “James and I got ‘em from the coin machine at the pizza place down the block. His is a tiger,” he added. “There was just something that convinced me that I needed a badass shark tat in my life for only three days.”

“You guys are ridiculous, but I gotta admit, I’m jealous of the ink.” Her fingers traced the blue outline across his upper arm. “Too bad that while you were busy preparing, Jacob’s scene ended.”

“Aw, that sucks, but I can still do it anyway.” His face went blank, a determined look in his eyes as he tried to get himself into character. “Kandi! Why do you have to be with that vampire Logan? Why can’t you be with me? We’d be so perfect for each other,” he wailed, dramatically burying his face into her shoulder.

“Werewolf Logan, I do not like you like that, though I must admit that you have a nice body.”

They chuckled for a moment before looking up at the television again.

“Okay, so this is the part where you find out that the bad guy is out to get me,” Kandi explained as she crossed her legs Indian-style.

“I got this.” Logan took a deep breath before he began. “Should I go put my shirt back on?”

Kandi’s brown eyes rolled in their sockets as her arm shoved his shoulder.

“Kandi, I think my enemies are trying to kill you,” he said, adding an edge to his voice as he stared intently at her.

“Oh Logan, please protect me with your sparkly skin and airbrushed abs!” She clutched his chest fiercely before looking up at him from beneath her lashes.

“Let’s just lay here in your bed all intimately and shit and not do anything so that I can watch you while you sleep,” Logan said in a rush as he lowered himself onto his side on the carpet.

“Because that isn’t sketchy at all,” she laughed as she joined him. Their foreheads pressed together as he stared into her eyes until she had to break away. “I think I like our version better,” she mumbled, enjoying the warmth of his breath against her skin.

“Cinematic gold,” he breathed, tucking a loose strand of chestnut hair behind her ear. His teeth sunk into his lower lip as his breathing hitched, eyes rolling back up towards the screen. ‘If they’re so in love, why don’t they ever fool around?”

Kandi stifled her laugh, though it was hard to mask the way her features twisted up in the gesture. “They don’t need to. They’re so much better than that,” she had to force the words from her mouth as if she were scolding him. “They like, dry hump though.”

“That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.” There was a brief moment of silence before he quipped up again. “Can we just fast-forward to that scene?”

“Hmm…” She pretended to ponder his suggestion as her thumb grazed the soft stretch of skin above his sternum. “I guess it wouldn’t be too much of a stretch.”

She flashed him a devious grin as she sat up, inching towards the couch to retrieve the remote. Though she still couldn’t make out the labels, her thumb edged around the familiar right-facing double arrows and pressed them repeatedly until she recognized the scene in question.

They didn’t have a large, ornate bed to work with in the living room, but the snuggie-covered carpet served the same purpose as she curved her body around his in an attempt to duplicate the way the two actors were laying on screen. It was oddly silent in the empty apartment without the sounds coming from the television’s speakers to drown out, just the sound of Logan’s shallow breathing. The smell of popcorn still clung to his breath, and though the scent made her want to gag, it was the emotion in his irises that held the most importance. The corny shark tattoo, the harsh flicker of the movie carrying on above them, everything else was secondary.

“Okay, this feels really awkward,” she admitted, nodding towards how her legs and arms were tangled around his frame.

“Mhm,” he agreed, but his hands curved around her side regardless, subtly pulling her closer.

As his lips met hers, everything began to fall into place. Though their bodies were mimicking the movements that played out on the screen above them, they weren’t trying to fit those roles anymore. It no longer felt awkward because it was Logan, her Logan, and even though they were being completely goofy, she couldn’t deny the reaction that being this close to him elicited from her.

They broke away for a moment, but their lips still moved against one another’s. Logan’s eyes were open, watching her and trying not to smile too much as she pretended to unbutton his nonexistent shirt.

But their movements picked back up again, growing more serious and forceful as her hips began to grind into his. His hands rubbed circles along the small of her back, edging her on, because he couldn’t comprehend how the character onscreen could stand just this. Maybe his dick was made of stone or something. Or maybe K-Stew just wasn’t that great of a lay.

Her lips tugged at his bottom lip longingly, her palm pressing into his chest as he regained control, his lips enveloping hers once more as the friction between them increased. They were so absorbed in each other that they didn’t hear her roommate unlock the door.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” the girl exclaimed, flapping her hands in the air. “We can leave if we’re interrupting anything.”

“No, it’s fine,” Kandi replied breathlessly, her leg still hooked over his hipbone. “We’re not doing anything, we’re just acting.”

“Yeah, okay,” Autum chuckled as she plopped down onto the sofa. “Whatever the kids are calling it these days.”

Kandi laughed as she sat up, running a hand through her own hair. “Seriously, we just got bored, and I somehow set the tv to mute, so we were making our own version of Eclipse,” she tried to explain, nodding towards the tame love scene still playing out on the screen.

“You know,” Autum sighed as she grabbed a handful of popcorn from the neglected bowl. “I would’ve rather just walked in on you guys banging. If it was anyone else, I wouldn’t believe them, but that just sounds like something you would do.”

“Hey,” Logan piped up. “You guys can join us. I mean, it’s actually been pretty fun, and we do need more of a cast.”

James spoke up from where he was standing behind the couch, his hazel eyes aglow with enthusiasm. “Can I be one of the werewolves? I do have nice abs.”