Waking up in Vegas

“God the sunsets in Arizona are so gorgeous. Sometimes I wish it would stay like that forever,” I said as I watched the sunset on the drive home from the baseball game.

“They are something. But the sunrises are even better. Because it’s so beautiful and like, you know a new fresh day is starting out of that beauty and everything about the new day just makes it look like, 100 times more amazing.”

“I don’t know if I’ve ever actually seen a sunrise. I’m not really an early riser.”

“That’s for sure.”

“Shut up!”

“We have to watch a sunrise together. It’s magical.”

“Really? Magical?” I teased.

“I know that sounds lame but I don’t care. It’s true. And I’m going to show you.”

“Oh really?”

“Yes. We are staying up all night, since there’s no way I would be able to get you out of bed early enough, and we are going to watch the sunrise.”

“Who says I’m agreeing to this?”

“I do.”

“And what are we going to do all night?”

“I can think of some things,” he said, winking at me.

“God you are such a pervert,” I said and slapped him on the shoulder.

He laughed and reached over to grab my leg and I slapped him away again with my own laugh.

He stopped in front of my house and I looked over at him, confused. “We’re watching the sunrise here?”

“No,” he said with a chuckle. “Go in and put on some comfortable clothes and get a pillow.”

“Ok…” I was still confused but I went in and did what he said. I was confused more than normal when it came to John but usually it ended well so I was starting to learn to just go with it.

I put on some leggings and a long t-shirt, and I grabbed a sweatshirt and my favorite pillow.

“Now what?” I asked when I slid back into the seat in John’s truck.

“You’ll see.”

“Why can’t you just tell me?!” He always did that.

“Surprises are always better.”

“Surprises are always better,” I mocked him and he just laughed.

He pulled away from the curb and started driving. He stopped when we reached his house. I reached towards the door handle to get out of the car but John stopped me.

“Just wait. I’ll be right back.”

“Ok,” I said and crossed my arms across my chest. “But I don’t see why you can’t just tell me.”

But John was already getting out of the truck and I knew he wasn’t going to answer me. He returned a few minutes later wearing basketball shorts and a hoodie with his arms full of blankets and pillows. He threw everything in the back of his truck before getting back into the driver’s seat.

“Can you tell me now?”

“Nope.”

“I hate you.”

He just laughed and started driving. I had no idea where we were going. And even when John stopped I still had no idea where we were, just somewhere in the middle of the desert.

John didn’t say a word as he turned the truck off and got out of the vehicle. I did the same and watched him as he walked around to the back of the truck and climbed up and started to spread out the blankets. He set the pillows up against the cab of the truck and I handed him mine so he could add it to the pile. Once he was done and satisfied he turned to me and held out his hand. He helped me up into the makeshift bed in the back of his truck and we leaned up against the pillows.

“So this is the big surprise?” I asked once we were settled in.

“Trust me; this is the best place to watch a sunrise. I come out here all the time to write. I’m not usually out here early enough to see the sunrise, but every once in a while I’ll come out here on purpose or just stay overnight just to see it. And you should feel honored because you’re the first person I’ve brought here. It’s like my private escape.”

“Well I do feel honored,” I said and I was kind of being honest. I wasn’t anyone special and for John to think I was made me feel good. “But don’t worry, I wouldn’t be able to find this place if I tried.”

John laughed and we got comfortable and just laid there and talked. I could talk to John for hours. Everything he had to say was so interesting and it was never boring. It was surprising that we still had new things to say and new things to learn about each other because we had already learned so much in the short amount of time we had been together. But apparently we were both pretty interesting and had some good stories to tell.

Eventually talking led to kissing and it was so romantic being out under the stars that it was inevitable. But I wasn’t complaining one bit.

Until John’s hands started roaming and things started getting too heated and I had to slow it down. I pulled away and pushed John away from me ever so slightly. “I need to slow down.”

He sighed a little but didn’t push it. He rolled over and lay on his back and we both tried to catch our breath.

“I’m sorry,” I said quietly.

“Don’t be sorry Kendall. If you’re not comfortable I’m not going to try to push you into something you don’t want to do.” My heart swelled a little at that comment. He was so different from other guys I had been in relationships with. He was such a genuinely good guy.

“I just haven’t had the best luck in past relationships.”

“I’m sorry. Those guys must have been complete idiots to do anything to jeopardize their chances with you.”

I blushed and smiled at how sweet he was being.

“Mostly they were just assholes. I was young and naïve and in a relationship with what I thought was a great guy. He was so sweet and he seemed perfect and when he told me he loved me I thought I felt the same way and I wanted to prove it to him. So I gave him my virginity and he gave me a broken heart. He never really loved me; he just wanted to have sex. So once he got what he wanted, he didn’t need me anymore.” I was starting to get emotional. Even after 5 years it still hurt to think about.

“Kendall, you don’t have to talk about this if you don’t want to. I know it must be hard.” He squeezed my hand, trying to comfort me and it was working.

“No, I want to. I want you to know. I usually never talk about this but I just want you to know.” For some reason I felt like I needed to tell John about this. I needed him to know about my past so that we could try to have a future.

“Ok,” he said simply and let me go on.

“So after that I was really weary, I was a skeptic, I didn’t believe that love existed and I was only 17. It was horrible. I didn’t really date anyone for a couple years and in college I finally met someone who seemed like a decent guy. He knew just the right things to say and do to make me feel good about myself and make me fall for him and after not feeling like that for a long time it didn’t take long for him to get me into bed. There was just something about him that turned me to putty in his hands. But the next morning he was gone before I even woke up. He never called me again, he didn’t answer any calls or texts and I never even saw him again because he didn’t live on campus. After that I swore to myself that I would make 100 percent sure that I was ready and that the guy wouldn’t just leave again before I would give anything up. I like you John, I’m just not ready.”

“I totally understand Kendall. And I’m glad you felt comfortable enough to tell me that. And I just really want to let you know that as much as I really like you, that wasn’t my intention at all for bringing you out here. I mean yeah, sex is great, but I just want to spend time with you and I wanted to share the experience of watching the sunrise with you. And I promise you that I would never do anything to hurt you.”

I was starting to think that John really was the perfect guy. Everything he did and said just made me feel great about myself and him and just everything. Knowing that he was respecting my wishes and not trying to pressure me into anything made me like him a whole lot more. Almost more than I could handle. I couldn’t help it when I leaned over and kissed him.

He smiled into the kiss but then it was his turn to push me back.

“But you can’t do that right now if you want me to be able to control myself.”

“Sorry,” I giggled and laid down next to him, cuddling up into his side. He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me in close, kissing the top of my head. We just lay there silent for a little while, watching the stars and enjoying being in each other’s arms, and I was starting to get sleepy.

“Hey, none of that!” John scolded when I yawned.

“I’m sorry!” But I could feel sleep overtaking me as hard as I was struggling to fight it off. I thought I was doing a decent job at it until I felt someone shaking me and yelling at me to wake up. Dammit.

“I told you not to fall asleep,” John said as I opened my eyes.

“Why did you let me?” I asked, turning it around on him.

“Because you looked so peaceful and I didn’t want to disturb you.”

“So then why did you?” I asked with a grin.

He didn’t say anything then, he just pointed to the sky. I looked up and the sight was enough to take anyone’s breath away.

The sun was just starting to come up and all of the colors were already amazingly gorgeous. I sat up and leaned against John, who wrapped his arms around me, and we watched the sun come up together. Neither one of us said a word, we just watched in awe.

When it was high in the sky above us I finally broke the silence.

“You were right; that was magical.” And I wasn’t sure if the things I was feeling only had to do with the sunrise or if there was something else behind it.