Baby, Maybe Someday.

“We truly don’t know what happened. She was stable, perfectly healthy. Her labor was difficult, but nothing out of the ordinary. Lucy just coded out of absolutely nowhere.”

Dean nodded numbly at the third doctor who had come to talk to them. He was in a different waiting room with Eliza, sitting a few chairs over and listening to her muffled sobbing. It didn’t matter how the different doctors tried to explain Lucy had died of unknown causes. It didn’t make Dean feel any better.

“Sir, we need to make arrangements for your daughter. Before she passed Lucy made it fairly clear that she wanted her to be with her father.”

Eliza didn’t say anything, so Dean just nodded again. “Yeah. Okay.”

“I know this is a very difficult time. We can settle all of this later.” the doctor gave him a sympathetic smile and then left the room.

Dean sat back in his chair, running a hand over his face. This wasn’t supposed to happen. Technically none of it was, but Dean had just barely come to terms with becoming a father. Now everything had changed all over again.

Eliza sniffed loudly, wiping her eyes on her sleeve. She glanced at Dean and spoke in a thick voice. “I don’t b-believe this.”

Dean didn’t respond, still deep in thought. Lucy must have been right when she said something wanted her gone. He was suddenly struck with terror that whatever had gotten her, it would come for the baby next. Maybe it was trying to get to him, or maybe it was some kind of horrible coincidence, but Dean had a feeling that his daughter wasn’t safe there any longer.

“I’m going to take her.” he replied to Eliza finally, his voice a low croak. “She’s coming with me.”

Eliza coughed to clear her throat. “No. I won’t let you.”

“You don’t have a choice.” Dean looked at her fiercely. “If you want what’s best for her, then you’ll let me take her.”

“I don’t know you. Lucy barely knew you. I will not let you leave here with my niece.” Eliza’s red puffy eyes were blazing with more than grief now. She was furious. “The fact that you would think I would makes you an even bigger idiot than I thought.”

Dean snarled at her, his hands becoming tight fists. “Okay, that’s it. I’m not going to put up with your biased bullshit, even if you are Lucy’s sister. I’m taking Cassie with me, and that’s the end of the story. Got it?”

Eliza shrunk back just a little at the anger in Dean’s voice. He had a look on his face that Eliza had seen before in her patients; the look that said he was close to breaking. His eyes were bright and moist with tears that even Eliza knew he was too proud to shed in front of her, his jaw tensed and his eyebrows pulled together into a harsh line. Maybe he was just as grief-stricken as her. Maybe Lucy had been more to him than just a few weekends.

Dean took her silence as being stubborn, and stood up with a grunt. He was determined to get that defenseless baby out of the hospital and somewhere safe. Dean could only think of Bobby’s, which made him groan internally. When he showed up with a baby Dean could picture Bobby’s face, and it wasn’t going to be pretty. Not that Bobby was ever pretty, but…well, Dean knew what he meant.

He found a nurse in the maternity ward, and asked her what he needed to do. Then he went to deal with the paperwork.

*

The paperwork took him nearly an hour, and then there was another hour or so of waiting for them to confirm he was the father with a blood test. Dean also had to take the time out to run to a Wal-mart and buy a car seat, then get it into the Impala. It went against everything he believed in, but it had to be done.

When Dean was in the baby section of the store he had started to worry about everything else he would need for the baby. What did you need for a baby? Bottles, toys, diapers…did you need special soap or something?

Dean didn’t have much time to worry, because as soon as he got to the maternity ward a nurse was bringing him a bundle that contained his barely three day old daughter. Dean awkwardly cradled his arms, and the nurse looked at him apprehensively. It was obvious he’d never come near holding a baby before.

“Support the head.” she told him as she placed the tiny person in his arms.

Dean’s mouth hung open slightly as he looked down at her face, her eyes barely open and her nose scrunched up in agitation. She felt so light in his arms, and so soft and warm. Dean froze as he thought that it was possible for him to break her. Did babies break easily?

She was so unbelievably small. The blanket was pretty snug around her, but Dean could feel her kicking her tiny feet around to try and get comfortable. Dean looked up at the nurse for some kind of guidance, but she was smiling at Cassie.

“Have a good afternoon.”

Suddenly Dean was alone with his baby. He stood in the middle of the hall for a moment, then turned around and left. He felt stiff and unsure and like he was about to completely freak out, but he knew he had to get her out of there.

“Dean! Wait!”

Eliza’s voice made Dean scowl, and he looked over his shoulder to see her running for him. “Try anything and I’ll scream ‘baby snatcher’.”

“I’m not going to try anything.” Eliza rolled her eyes at him. “I just…I wanted to give you this.”

Dean shifted Cassie around carefully so he could take the slip of paper that Eliza was handing him. It had a phone number written on it, and Dean raised an eyebrow at her curiously.

“You should take her. You’re her father.” Eliza wouldn’t look him in the eye as she spoke. “But I expect you to keep in touch with me. I want to be involved in my niece’s life. I think…I think Lucy would have wanted it too.”

Dean swallowed to keep a lump out of his throat at the mention of Lucy. “Yeah. I think I can do that. Even though you were off-the-charts crazy.”

Eliza gave him a dirty look only momentarily. “Thank you. Now let me help you get her to your car. You’ve clearly never been in contact with an infant before.”

He couldn’t help smiling at Eliza just a little as she took Cassie from his arms, kissing her tiny forehead before going out of the hospital ahead of Dean. When he pointed out his car she made a loud noise of disbelief.

“This isn’t going to work for very long. This is not safe for a baby.” she bent over slightly to peer inside. “Are there even seatbelts?”

“Yes, there are seatbelts.” Dean quickly got defensive of his other baby. “I have a car seat properly installed in the back if you haven’t noticed.”

“I see it, but whether or not it’s actually installed right is up to debate. Hold her so I can check it.”

Dean grumbled something about ‘battleaxe’ as he took his daughter back. Eliza gave him a short glare before opening the back door, clicking her tongue at the loud creak it made. She tugged on the seat in various places, then rocked it back and forth in her hands. When she straightened up she put her hands on her hips.

“It’ll do for now, but you had better get something safer to drive her around in. Where do you work by the way?”

Dean stuttered for a second, surprised he’d been thrown. He must have been distracted by Cassie making a soft whimpering noise. “Mechanic. I’m a mechanic.”

“Should have known.” mumbled Eliza. “Okay, I’ll put her in. Watch me so you’ll know what to do.”

Dean did watch, but it was confusing. There had to be the right amount of support, and padding, and all kinds of other things so she wouldn’t go flopping around. Eliza stood back like it was nothing, then tucked the pink blanket around Cris in her car seat.

“Think you can handle this?”

The honest answer to her question would have been ‘not even a little’, but Dean forced a grin. “Sure. Piece o’ cake.”

“Don’t make me regret this, Winchester.” Eliza poked him in the chest. “Now, if you’ll follow me to Lucy’s house I can give you everything she had ready for Cassie. I’m sure you’ll need it.”

“That would be great.” Dean almost looked genuinely thankful, one of the gigantic weights on his shoulders being lifted.

Eliza nodded, glancing down at Cassie dubiously. She couldn’t decide if she was doing the right thing or not, but her bad feeling about Dean had changed when she saw his reaction to her sister’s death. If she could help it Eliza wasn’t going to take a child away from her father. She’d seen too many families torn apart, too many kids who never knew their dads.

Wordlessly Eliza went to her car, and Dean got into the Impala to follow her. He looked in the rear-view mirror, watching Cassie in her car-seat. He prayed she would keep sleeping until they got to Bobby’s, unsure what he would do if she started to cry. While he was watching her she opened her mouth into a wide ’o’, yawning and then settling back down into sleep.

Dean felt a swell in his chest that wasn’t quite uncomfortable, but it was definitely new. He was a little proud that he’d created the tiny life snoozing in the back seat. It was weird to see a baby in the Impala, but it wasn’t bad. Dean could see himself getting used to it.

He could see himself liking it a lot.