Tortured Hearts

Will’s P.O.V

I was going to a club with some of the other guys on the team when Hanna turned up at the same club. I had been trying to distance myself from her, since I didn’t want to actually gain any feelings for her. The guys kept hounding me with questions about whether we were an item, but I carried on saying that we were nothing special. We weren’t anything special; Hanna would never be that special.
I drank my drink as she came over wearing a short skirt and a low-cut top. I mentally remarked how Alicia would never wear anything like that and then I cursed myself for bringing her up again. I wasn’t getting back with Alicia. Part of me didn’t even want to think of that, since my emotions were already being pulled towards Hanna. Try as I might to hate her, there was always some kind of spark there.
“Hey handsome, wanna dance with me?” She asked, clearly showing off in front of the rest of my teammates. They all raked over her body with appreciative glances. It made my blood boil a little and I directed my anger to her.
“No. I’m fine here. Do what you like.” My voice edged on becoming nasty and she looked momentarily hurt as she realised I’d publicly rejected and humiliated her. Then I saw a steely look overtake her expression and she swivelled on her heels to go back to the dance floor.
“Are you crazy?” Steve asked me. Ever since we’d become friends on the bonding trip, he was sure that Hanna and I were an item and if we weren’t, he repeatedly told me what an idiot I was.
“I’m not arguing about this,” I replied simply before turning my eyes to glance at the dance floor.
Hanna was recognisable amongst the mass of people, her blonde hair and trashy clothes drawing attention from most of the guys there. It angered me to see her behaving so provocatively when she knew I was watching… yet again, I had told her to do as she liked. Why was I even thinking this over? It struck me suddenly that I was beginning to feel jealous of the guys grinding up on Hanna as she danced into them. A brief glance around to some of the other girls there proved that Hanna was doing nothing more than what other girls were doing, but I was so focused on Hanna that I hadn’t noticed.
“If you’re just going to stare at her all night, why don’t you just go dance with her?”
I turned my attention away from her, trying to play down my attraction to her. At the bar were some of Alicia’s friends and I found myself scanning around them to make sure she wasn’t there. The worst thing would be if she saw me staring so obviously at Hanna, especially since we hadn’t really talked since we broke up. Since I found no sight of Alicia, I began wondering why she wasn’t with them. Had she found someone else already? It was selfish to wish she would never be with anyone else, but part of me hoped that she’d still be waiting for me to figure out what the hell I was supposed to do to make it better, if there really was anything I could do.
I found my eyes drifting back over to Hanna and I couldn’t keep my jealousy to myself in the end. I decided to forget Alicia since I had bigger problems to deal with. Standing up, I ignored the questions from the guys around me as I hit the floor, ready to pull her out of the pack of animals she was dancing with. Hanna’s big eyes looked up at me as though she had done nothing wrong but a sly smile spread across her glossy pink lips, letting me know that she knew exactly how crazy she was making me.
“This relationship is abusive,” I shouted into her ear as I leaned down to speak to her over the blaring club music.
She laughed a little and then her breath caressed my ear as she replied, “But you admit it is a relationship.” I hadn’t even realised what I’d admitted until she said that to me. I stared at her as she leaned back into her own space, a smile still playing on her lips. Why was it that I wanted to kiss those lips so badly? I knew they’d be sticky from the gloss but something about the way it made her lips stand out made me want to let go of all my hate and just give into my lust.
Before I knew it, she had her arms wound around my neck and her face close to mine as she moved her body to the music. I watched as she lost herself in the moment. When she looked up at me, her blue eyes daring me to do something, I found myself giving in and I leaned in to kiss her right there and then. I’d previously thought that kissing on a club dance floor was cheap and tasteless, but right at that moment I forgot all about that. Her mouth tasted of strawberry and alcohol and I couldn’t get enough of it… or her.

Hanna dragged me out of the club, leading me with her hand firmly clasped around mine. I felt like I was prey being dragged behind a predator. I stopped when I felt someone hitting my shoulder, saying my name loudly as they did. Hanna stopped with me and I let go of her hand as I turned to look at who was being so demanding. I recognised the girl as one of Alicia’s friends and by the slightly intoxicated look on her face, I realised she’d had too much to drink.
“You are one sick fuck, Will,” she said, her words sounding clear enough despite her state. “To think I thought you seemed like a nice guy when I first met you. No, I was mistaken, wasn’t I?”
“If this is about Alicia, this isn’t the place—”
“Her twin sister’s heart is beating in your lying, cheating chest! It’s practically Alicia’s heart in you! And you tore hers out and stood on it whilst her dead twin’s keeps you alive.” I was shocked that she knew all that she did and suddenly I found myself becoming angry for the fact that anyone could overhear what she was saying as she yelled at me. I realised then that I needed to have stronger word with Alicia about the way she was clearly shooting her mouth off about me.
I grabbed hold of the girl’s arm and pulled her close as I glowered at her, “Keep your voice down.”
“What, so no-one hears your dirty little secret?” She hit me in the chest and I pushed her away from me into one of Alicia’s male friends. I thought I remembered his name as being Greg and I definitely will remember him more clearly after what happened next.
“You pushing girls around now?” he yelled, getting up into my face with his. He was trying to intimidate me but I was too angry to care.
“Will, let’s just go,” Hanna was pleading as she grasped my arm, tugging on me.
“Yeah, listen to your slut girlfriend and save your pretty little face,” he sneered and I lost it over him calling Hanna a slut. Sure, I might say it, but it was another thing coming from another guy. I hit him, my fist coming away throbbing as he stumbled back a little. What I wasn’t expecting was for him to recover so quickly and to punch me right back.
We could have gone on that way until one or both of us were dead but Hanna pushed her way between us, her blue eyes pleading into mine to stop. I wiped my bloody lip roughly and then grabbed her hand, pulling us both away from the scene we’d all caused.
I was too wound up to talk to Hanna anymore and I left her at her bedroom door as I slammed mine shut. I paced my room for a while, wondering how the hell I’d gone from being a nice guy to one who cheated on their girlfriend and got into fights with other guys.
Feeling my lip beginning to swell, I went into the bathroom and looked at myself hard in the mirror. Perhaps part of my anger stemmed from the fact that Alicia’s friend was sort of right. Inside my chest was Britt’s heart, identical to that of Alicia’s… and I’d screwed her over whilst her twin’s heart pumped blood round my body. I breathed out heavily and turned the taps on to wash my face.
What I’d done to Alicia was terrible, but I couldn’t keep paying for that for the rest of my life. I needed to tell her she couldn’t just blurt my secret out to anyone she felt like talking to. After all, I’d lost her in the first place because I was trying so hard to keep my secret from getting out. If she spoilt my chances of getting on a proper team, then everything I had done would be in vain.


Alicia’s P.O.V

After having the best night I could have dreamed of, I entered the kitchen and came down from my good mood a little. Greg was sporting a bruised face and appeared to have just been in a heated argument with Mark of all people. They both went quiet as I walked in.
“What is it?” I walked over to Mark and squeezed into the seat next to him, wanting to be near to him to try to keep my good mood afloat a little. “What happened to your face?”
“I got into a fight.”
“I can see that. Who with though?”
Greg shrugged before quickly leaving the kitchen. I turned to Mark as if asking ‘what did I do?’
Mark averted his gaze from mine as though in thought and I realised he knew what had gone on. Thinking back to the previous night, I realised Mark must have seen Greg fighting outside that club… but who was he fighting with?
“Are you going to tell me or are you going to keep things from me? Because I thought you wanted me to believe you were different.” My words came out a little harsher than I meant them to but he got the message as he turned to look into my eyes with his.
“You deserve to know everything I know,” he nodded and then licked his lips before continuing. I was almost mesmerised by the action but I remembered that this was important. “I saw Greg and Will fighting outside the club last night with Hanna trying to pull them apart. I didn’t want you to get involved, so I didn’t say anything.” At my silence, he felt the need to elaborate. “We were having such a nice evening, I didn’t want it spoilt for you.”
I stayed silent for a few moments before I gradually smiled a little at Mark. What he said made sense and his intentions were sweet, after all. I then leaned over and hugged him, letting my head rest against his chest as I wondered what they were fighting over. My thoughts immediately went to Hanna.
“Does Greg find Hanna attractive?” I asked and Mark stiffened, pushing me away so he could look at my face properly.
“No. Why would you ask that?”
I looked away before I explained. “It’s just that they were both fighting over something… do you think she’s attractive?” I met his eyes gingerly when he said nothing and I met an awe-struck expression. Then he started laughing so much that I couldn’t help but let out a small laugh as well. Ok, what I’d asked was silly but I still wanted an answer.
When he’d finished laughing he said, “No. You’re unbelievable at times, Alicia. I don’t know where your thoughts go to.”
I shrugged. “I thought that maybe if they were fighting over her that… well, I wondered whether every guy found her attractive.”
“Do you really believe that every guy would?”
“Yes… maybe… ok, no. Not every guy. Just most guys I know seem to think so.”
“Well not me. Don’t think of that ever again, ok?”
I smiled shyly at him and nodded. “Ok.”

Later that day I was outside, still trying to get in touch with Cora to let her know about Mark. I had regained the buzz I’d had when I woke up as I tried once again to ring her. If I couldn’t get in touch with her, I’d have to walk over to her room to make sure she was ok after going out last night. I hoped she hadn’t seen what had happened with Greg and Will.
Suddenly I felt a hand tighten around my arm and I was about to yell out in fear and surprise when Will spun me around to face him. He too had bruises all over his face and a bust lip.
“We need to talk,” he bit out, looking more pissed off than I think I’d ever seen him. He grabbed onto my arm again and started to tug me towards a wooded, secluded area. I pulled my arm from his grasp.
“I can walk there myself,” I stated as I rubbed my arm where his touch had made me tender.
When we came into the clearing, he rounded on me. “What do you think you’re doing? Do you really hate me that much that you’re trying to destroy my whole life?” His voice boomed at me and I wondered what on earth he was going on about.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said quietly, trying my hardest to figure out how I could be ruining his life when I wasn’t even in it anymore.
“You,” he spat, “going around blurting out my secret to everyone you meet.”
“I haven’t told anyone…” I trailed off, looking away when I realised that just yesterday I’d let slip to Cora about Britt’s heart. “Oh, wait… I did tell Cora. Did she say something to you?” I had asked Cora not to tell anyone, but Will wasn’t exactly out of the loop on this one.
“So you did tell people,” he cried, holding his hands up. “I can’t believe you’d do that to me.”
“I’m sorry if she said something to you. Did she?” I wanted to know why he was so angry with me.
“Yes of course she fucking said something!” he yelled at me, his brown eyes boring into mine. “And look what it cost me. Look at my face!”
I looked at his face and repeated my apology, “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry? You could have me thrown out of my course over this! Even if the coach doesn’t find out about my secret.” He was about to yell at me some more and I felt the tears welling up in my eyes as I watched the person I used to love turning into an angry monster, but at that moment Mark rushed into the clearing and saw what was going on.
“Will,” he stated, waiting for Will to realise there was somebody else there. “I think you should leave now.” Will gave me one last glance before he stormed out of the clearing.
I felt a lump forming at my throat and really didn’t want Mark telling me how I should have stood up for myself. But instead of telling me how I should have reacted, he simply came and hugged me to him, holding me into his chest as I let out the sobs that had been building.
I don’t remember how long we stood there like that but eventually, my sobs stopped and I pulled my face away from Mark’s now wet t-shirt. “Sorry,” I apologised. “And thanks.”
“There’s no need to apologise, or thank me. I’m here for you Alicia, I mean it,” he stated as he cupped my face in his hands, looking deep into my eyes. Then he leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to my forehead.
“I have to go and finish talking with him once he’s calmed down a little. We need to sort some things out.”
“I understand,” he replied. “Have you got something to do in the meantime?”
“Yes actually. I was going to get in touch with Cora but that will have to wait until I’ve sorted things out with Will. However, I do have to contact Mills about the whole Charlie situation. I kind of need her to keep an eye on him whilst I’m here.”
Mark nodded and walked me back to our halls. Then I left him to go into my room, knowing that I needed to give Will some time to calm down and realise what an ass he’d been, even if I couldn’t expect Will to realise when he was being one after everything that had happened between us.