I've Got My Mind Set on You

My whole body felt numb. I couldn't feel a thing. I couldn't even think straight. All I could think about was his lips on her. The way he didn't even look sorry. The way she just stood there looking guilty. God that was what was the worst part, was that she was guilty looking. I hated that. She wouldn't of had to look that way if she would have just saved me the time, not to mention the fucking airplane ticket, and told me she liked him. God she fucking liked him!

"Josh man say something." I looked up from the empty glass I was looking at. I had already downed five glasses of whiskey, and I wasn't even feeling on top of the world. That was all I wanted to feel, happy crazy, no self control. But I couldn't, not with this pain of heart break and resentment building up inside of me, threatening to kill me.

"Ya dude seriously. You've been staring for ten minutes." I looked up at Dave. God how I was jealous of him. I knew exactly what he was thinking. Sure he may have been worried about me, but deep down he was just thinking about how lucky he was that it wasn't fucking Sophie, Max was locking lips with.

I heard the door to the bar open, an looked over to see her panicked face walk in. She looked around the room, then spotted me. I watched as she tried to calmly walk over here. As she got closer I saw the tears in her eyes. Good, I hope she was crying. Jimmie must have seen her because he stopped mid sentence, and got up from his chair. My eyes followed him as I watched to see what he was going to do.

"No, get the fuck out Tessa." he started.

"Josh please let me explain." she reasoned to me. I didnt want to listen though.

"You've explained enough when you were making out with that guy!" Matt helped.

"Please Josh hear me out. I heard you out with Miranda." now that pissed me off.

"There was one key thing missing in that, that is obviously in this one. I didn't kiss her!!" I yelled. I watched as she stepped back shocked. I saw the other guys flinch also. I was never one to yell, but I guess that's what alcohol did to me when it couldntMy whole body felt numb. I codnt feel a thing. I couldn't even think straight. All I could think about was his lips on her. The way he didn't even look sorry. The way she just stood there looking guitly. God that was what was the worst part, was that she was guilty looking. I hated that. She wouldn't of had to look that way if she would have just saved me the time, not to mention the fucking airplane ticket, and told me she liked him. God she fucking liked him!

"Josh man say something." I looked up from the empty glass I was looking at. I had already downed five glasses of whiskey, and I wasn't even feeling in top of the world. That was all I wanted to feel, happy crazy, no self control. But I couldn't, not with this pain of heart break and resentment building up inside of me, threatening to kill me.

"Ya due seriously. You've been staring for ten minutes." I looked up at Dave. God how I was jealous of him. I knew exactly what he was thinking. Sure he may have been worried about me, but deep down he was just thinking about hownlucky he was that it wasn't fucking Sophie Max was locking lips with.

I heard the door to the bar open, an dloomed ove to see her panicked face walk in. She looked around the room, then spotted me. I watched as she tried to calmly walk over here. As she got closer I saw the tears in her eyes. Good, I hope she was crying. Jimmie must have seen her because he stopped mid sentence, and got up from his chair. My eyes followed him as I watched to see what he was going to do.

"No, get the fuck out Tessa." he started.

"Josh please let me explain." she reasoned to me. I didnt want to listen though.

"You've explained enough when you were making out with that guy!" Matt helped.

"Please Josh hear me out. I heard you out with Miranda." now that pissed me off.

"There was one key thing missing in that, that is obviously in this one. I didn't kiss her!!" I yelled. I watched as she stepped back shocked. I saw the other guys flinch also. I was never one to yell, but I guess that's what alcohol did to me when it couldnt make me happy.

I didn't feel like arguing anymore, or seeing her when tears were going to come at any moment. So I stood up from the bar, paid the bar tender, and side stepped Tessa walking out of the bar.

For the first time I had actually felt happy, in love, yet somehow now felt like I had nothing. I guess that little girl was wrong, not everything worked out for people who were in love.

I walked across the parking lot to my car, ready to start a new life, with just me, the guys, my guitar, and whiskey.