How to be Emo

Danny came to the door, his green eyes confused. “Hey, Beth.” He smiled, welcoming me in with a swift gesture.

I came inside the clean house and smiled at Danny. “Wow, you can’t be serious.” I grinned and gave him a small hug. “And you have a child?”

“We should really talk about that somewhere else,” Danny said, his soft face becoming stern. He led me upstairs to a clean room that only had a dresser and a bed, a twin bed.

“Is she really yours?” I asked, closing the door behind us. God, he looked so different. He had shaved his head so that there were little prickles, he had lost weight, and his features seemed more mature than I remember.

“No.” Danny sat on the bed and it released a squeak. “Her name is Quinn, she’s seven, and I’ve taken care of her since she was an infant. Quinn was left on my porch when she was just three months and I’ve enjoyed every second. I love this girl Beth and I want you to accept that.”

My mouth fell open with questions. “Didn’t you drink and do drugs? Do you still do that?”

Danny laughed. “No, Beth. I did drink and I did do drugs, but I don’t now. I know, you probably wanted to come here and change me. I know you too well. Beth, I also know that you aren’t perfect. No one is.” He pecked my cheek. “Tell me about your life.”

“I graduated, but I didn’t go to the graduation. I have a diploma. I had a job, but I’ve had too much drama so I quit. I’m in a relationship, a very serious one. I’m getting married.” I showed him the ring.

“Are you pregnant?” Danny asked, glancing at my stomach.

“No.” I smiled. “We’re in love. I know that sound corny and horrible, but I love him so much that I’m exhausted.” I let out a deep breath. “We, Leon and I, don’t plan to get married anytime soon, because I want to go to college and get a job. He understands me.”

Danny grinned. “That’s good. I thought you were going to end up like mom, Beth, but apparently not and I’m happy for you.”

I wiped away from tears. “Thanks.” I stretched my legs. “Hey Danny.”

He met my eyes. “Yeah?”

“I love you.” I touched the door knob and whirled back for a second to hug him. The hug was awkward at first, because we rarely hugged or touched. “I’m so proud of you, Danny, more than I’ll ever be.” I kissed his forehead and left for real this time.

The ride home on the transit was just like going in the first place. The transit stopped a few blocks from Leon’s place and I walked to the house, feeling better than ever. I opened the door and walked around downstairs. No Leon. I went upstairs and looked in every room. He wasn’t there. I came to his room and saw him sleeping on the bed with pages in his hands. I slowly took the pages from his hands and saw it was something I had written. One of my fiction stories about abuse. My story that clearly said DO NOT READ on it.

I couldn’t believe him! I threw the pages to the floor and searched for my suitcase. I heard him wake up, but I didn’t care. He had no right to read my personal stuff, especially something that related to my life so much. I finally found my suitcase in the basement and when I got back upstairs, Leon looked at me, confused and concerned.

“What are you doing?” Leon seemed hurt, just seeing the suitcase. “Are you leaving?” I know he wanted to say: Why are you leaving me?

“Why were you reading my story? My personal story?” I was so angry that I was about to explode! “How could you!”

“Oh my god! You’re running away without even asking! You’re so overdramatic and can’t talk about the situation! All you do is run away!” Leon yelled back. “How am I even with you if you’re just going to run away? You’ll probably even run away at the alter! I can’t believe what am idiot I am!”

I stood there, dumbfounded. “Maybe running away is better is that’s what you think.”

“You’re just overreacting over me reading a story of yours, imagine what happens if I take something away from you! Beth, you are such a baby!” Leon yelled, not realizing how much pain he was creating.

I stood there. “Running away sound pretty good right now.” I took off my ring and handed it to him. “I’m sorry I’m such a disappoint to you. I’m sorry I act like a child. I’m sorry that you don’t want to marry me anymore, but it’s probably best.” I took a step back and headed for the dresser to get my clothes out.

Time passed, slowly. I got everything packed up and Leon just sat on the bed, looking at me. I didn’t really have anything more to say and I didn’t have anything more to give him. When I had everything packed up, I went back upstairs to his room.

“Leon, can I say one last thing?” I asked his mute body.

“Whatever.” Leon didn’t meet my eyes; he just stared at the ring.

“I did this so that I wouldn’t have to deal with my mom or brother when we were married. So that I wouldn’t have any worries about my past creeping up on us and try to ruin our happy life. That’s it. That’s all I have to say.” I walked downstairs, holding back my tears. I stood at the bottom of the stairs for a minute or to, hoping to hear him coming after me, but there was no thumping of his feet. He didn’t come after me and I didn’t stay.