How to be Emo

I sat at the park for a while, thinking of what I could do and where I could go. I couldn’t stay here—at the park—again. I sighed, got to my feet, and glanced around. I left my phone vibrate in my pocket. I opened it to see Leon’s number. I guess there’s no better time than now. “Hello.”

“You need to come back to the house.” Leon didn’t seemed pained to talk to me, even though I was shaking. “Your brother came by and dropped off his...Quinn.”

Tears built up in my eyes, realizing that another family member was dropping their baggage on me. “I’ll be there in a few. I need my bag anyways.”

By the time I got to his house again, Leon was standing outside with Quinn, her cheeks streaked with tears. I glanced at Leon as I embraced Quinn and picked her up. As she sobbed on my arm, I took my bag from him and as I turned around, Leon grabbed my arm.

“Where are you going to stay?” Oddly enough, he seemed concerned, but I just shrugged it off.

“Why do you suddenly care? Go fuck Senna some more.” I walked away from him until we came my old house. I felt her unconscious body in my arms as I opened the door. The smell of the house burnt my nose with one small whiff. I headed upstairs, laid her on my bed, put a blanket over her sleeping body, and went into my mothers’ room.

I stood there, staring at it hard enough that my eyes burnt. I went downstairs into the kitchen and got out garbage sacks. I went back upstairs and threw everything away that belonged to my mother into the garbage bag.

When I was finished I went outside, breathing in the fresh air. I realized that having Quinn around made it so I couldn’t go to college. Sure, no one wants to face the facts, but I did. I had to. I sighed, tears dripping from my eyes. I glanced over to the bushes to remember Leon kissing me in his wizard outfit and...my mom beating me. I tore my eyes away from the bushes and headed back inside to make a list.

I decided to sleep after I was done with my lists. I didn’t really dream of anything. I wouldn’t let myself think of Leon. I wouldn’t let myself slip up again.

“Beth.” The small voice barely met my ears until she came up on the bed and opened my arms.

My eyes fluttered open and I smirked. “Sleep good, baby.”

***

I woke myself up, my body feeling sick from my toes to my chest. I jumped out of bed and went to the bathroom that separated me from my mother. Food that I had eaten days ago came out, sending chills up and down my spine.

Finally, I started vomiting spit. I wiped my mouth with the last strands of toilet paper. I coughed up a lung before I got to my feet. I steadied myself with the counter as I brought in a deep breath. I went into mom’s room again to find Quinn in the corner. “Wanna go shopping?”