Status: new;based on reader feedback

Happiness For A Pessimist

all we have is what's left today

"I hate him Garrett." I whispered.

"Why? It's not like you should care about who he sleeps with." Garrett said as he flipped through the TV channels.

Then it occurred to me that I never told anyone I was with John. Therefore he never really cheated on me to everyone else. I bite my lip and sat down next to Garrett, bringing my knees up to my chest and holding the tightly.

"I'm g-going t-to g-go." I whispered unraveling my body. "Night."

Garrett didn't respond, instead he simply shrugged me off keeping his full attention on the TV screen. I held back the tars as I exited his house and headed toward the city. I walked down the streets ignoring all the weird looks people were giving me.

I got to this large building, the building my mom use to work at. It's a tall skyscraper she would work in and dad would always bring me here to visit her. I only come here when I really miss my mom, or feel like shit.

I entered the building and continued to ignore the looks I was receiving from everyone. I got into the elevator and pressed the button leading to the last. The ride was silent, with only the sound of a business man clicking away on his phone. I got off on the last floor and headed toward the rooftop staircase. I opened the door feeling a burst of cold air hit me.

I shuddered and walked up the steps finally seeing the city at it's finest. I walked toward the ledge and stared at the bottom, all the cars zooming by underneath me. My mind began to wander, to the day I first met John.

I was only beginning middle school and John was already in high school. It started off as a crush, and ended in something much more.

I stepped closer to the edge, the tips of my toes barely hanging off the ledge. If I were to jump right now I would die. There's no chance I would survive, and if I were I'd be dead yet alive. Breathing yet dead.

"I hate you." I screamed. "I hate you John!" I cried feeling the tears escape from my eyes. "I hope you happy." I whispered spreading my arms and moving forward slightly.

In one second I could be dead.