Honestly, I've Got The Guts To Say Anything

[ALEX]
“Do you even know where we are right now?” She said, laughing.
“I’m not that drunk.” I slurred.
“Yeah, your wasted.” She said with a smile, and she pulled me close and placed a soft kiss on my lips as thunder cracked over head, it didn’t bother me. I was with her and everything was perfect.
“It’s raining.” I laughed, feeling steady raindrops on my shoulders, which started soft and sped up, until we were both soaking wet in the pouring rain.
“Wow, I didn’t notice.” She joked with a grin. “Come on, lets get back inside.”
“Wait, Anna.” I said, pulling her back to me, suddenly needing to tell her something I’ve never said before.
“What? We’re getting soaked.” She giggled.
“I love you.” I told her.
“Alex, I don’t want you to tell me this now.” She sighed. To which I looked quizzically at her. “Your drunk, Alex. I don’t want you to tell me this now. I don’t want to believe it, then tell you tha--that I love you to. Then have you not even remember this conversation tomorrow.” I was surprised to see there were tears in her eyes.
“I’m not just saying this because I’m drunk.” I smiled. “I do love you.”
“and if you still feel that way when your sober, let me know.” She said sadly, and walked away
[ANNA]
(Earlier That Night)
It was around seven thirty when we got to the bar to celebrate Jack’s birthday.
“Fuckin’ twenty three! The last to join us all. Happy birthday Jack!” Alex yelled as a toast, and we all downed our shots. I’m not usually a drinker, so I didn’t plan on drinking that much tonight. I ordered a glass of wine, and that’s all I planned on having for alcoholic beverages that night.
I sat down on a stool, and looked around. I saw Rian and Cassadee on a couch together, they looked deeply engaged in a conversation. They both had beers in hand. Rian usually drank a lot, but Cassadee would keep him from going overboard tonight. She usually didn’t drink that much. I saw Zack sitting two stools down from me. He was talking to the bartender but he wasn’t drinking either. Zack usually played the role of designated driver. Jack and Alex were at the far end of the bar. It looked like they were engaged in some sort of drinking game. They were probably already drunk. They were the partiers, always the most hammered out of all of us. Alex was worse than Jack though. Alex likes to get shit-faced, and doesn’t know when to stop. Jack on the other hand knew when he’s had too much.
“Another drink?” The bartender asked, me seeing I was almost done with my wine. I shook my head and waved her way when I heard a voice from behind me.
“Hey, babe, want a shot?” I turned to see Alex, stumbling over to where I was sitting.
“Nope, I’m all set.” I told him. He shrugged and downed both shots he had in his hands and sat on the stool next to me.
“Are you having fun?” He asked me.
“Yeah, I am.” I replied with a smile, as he took three more shots from the bartender, and drank all three. “Come, on. Let’s go get some fresh air.”
“Okay.” He said, smiling drunkenly at me.
“Do you even know where we are right now?” I laughed as I pulled him outside.
“I’m not that drunk.” he slurred.
“Yeah, your wasted.” I said, and kissed him softly on the lips. Up ahead, thunder struck, and I saw the bright flash of lightning from far ahead.
“It’s raining.” he told me
“Wow, I didn’t notice.” I joked as I pulled him into a kiss while steady rain drops began to fall on our heads. For a while we just stood there and kissed, but soon we were drenched, and I knew we should get out of the rain. “Come on, lets get back inside.”
“Wait, Anna.” he said, pulling me back, seeming suddenly serious.
“What? We’re getting soaked.” I giggled.
“I love you.” he told me, which surprised me. He’s never said that before, and we’ve been together for six months. I loved him. I knew that I did, but I was also sober. He wasn’t, and I didn’t want him to tell me that for the first time while he was so trashed that he would probably forget the conversation ever happened in the morning.
“Alex, I don’t want you to tell me this now.” I sighed. He looked at me confused, so I continued “Your drunk, Alex. I don’t want you to tell me you love me, for the first time like this. I don’t want to believe it, then tell you tha--that I love you to. Then have you not even remember this conversation tomorrow.” I was surprised to see that I was beginning to cry. I bit my lip, but I couldn’t keep the tears from welling up in my eyes.
“I’m not just saying this because I’m drunk.” he said with a kind, drunken smile. “I do love you Anna.”
“and If you still feel that way when your sober, let me know.” I said, my voice breaking, I could no longer stop myself from crying. So I turned, and headed back to the bar.
[ALEX]
I woke up with a horrible banging in my skull. I sat up and looked around, but I could tell that I had got up too quickly, and I instantly leaned over the bed to throw up.
Lucky I have the bottom bunk. Someone would not be happy if I was on top of them. I thought to myself.
“Lovely.” I said, slowly climbing out of bed as another wave of nausea swept over me. I stumbled over to the bathroom and pulled two Tylenol out of the cabinet. After swallowing both pills dry, I turned and went to see what was going on. It looked like everybody was still sleeping, but when I went to the front lounge of the bus, I found Anna sitting on the couch, reading a book.
“Hey.” I said, she looked up and smiled at me.
“Hey, hung over much?” She said with a small smile, but it didn’t reach her eyes.
“Yeah, remind me again why I drink so fucking much?” I asked, as she shrugged and returned to her book.
“Did I do something wrong?” I asked, hoping she wasn’t mad at me.
“No, just forget it. I knew you wouldn’t remember anyways.” She told me sadly. I sat down on the couch opposite her and tried to think what I did last night. It was all a bit blurry, but bits and pieces were starting to form in my mind. I remembered a storm, and pouring rain. Then it hit me.
“No, I won’t forget it, because I didn’t forget it.” I said, causing her to look up from her book again, curious. “When I’m drunk, honestly I’ve got the guts to say anything, but when I’m sober I’m scared. I’m scared to tell you these things, because I’m scared you won’t say it back. I’m scared that you don’t feel the same way. That’s why these past six months, I haven’t said it yet. I was scared. I’m not scared anymore. I remember what I said last night, and I remembered that you didn’t want to hear it. Well, I’m sober now, and whether you want to hear it or not, I love you Annabelle Taylor Montgomery. I’ve loved you since the day I met you.”
“I--I love you too Alex.” She replied, surprised, but she had with a huge grin on her face. She put her book down, and came over to kiss me.
“I love you Anna.” I whispered in her ear, to which she replied with another soft kiss. She sat down next to me, and I took her hand. We didn’t say much, those three words could say all that we needed.
For a while, we just sat there, hand in hand. Until, I saw her eyes begin to droop, and I realized she must not have gotten much sleep last night dealing with mine, and the rest of the bands drunken asses.
She rested her head on my shoulder, and soon her breathing steadied and I knew she had fallen asleep. I kissed her forehead softly, and thought about how I really did truly love her.