Terra Firma

Cosette

'And what is the use of a book,' thought Cosette, 'without pictures or conversations?'

I was being transported in a rickety wheelbarrow along a dusty cobblestone road, rolling and rocking and puffing on a cigarette lazily. Trees hung twisting around us, neon green grass rose up to meet a teal blue sky. I blinked, annoyed by the gumdrop colors and sugary sweet air.

"Cosette.." One of the card-men, his voice layered with a thick southern accent, called from his position of pushing me in the old mahogany cart, "where is it you reckon you wanna go?"

It was then that I saw the white smile, floating above me stunningly.

"Heeellloooo pretty lady."

I ignored his smooth talking cat-call, getting down to business,

"Pardon me, sir. Do you mind telling me which way to go?"

"Well it depends. Where do you want to go, old pal?"

"...I don't really know..."

"Then it doesn't matter!"

I frowned. He continued.

"Up there is a castle, Where the Queen lives with her Hatter. Talk to either if you like, but they're both rather mad."

"Oh." I said quietly, "I don't think I want to talk to mad people."

"Oh, oh. You can't help that."

"Wha--"

"I'm mad. You're mad. We're all mad here."

"But I'm not mad... I'M NOT... I'm not."

"But you must be! You have to be. You are here."

I 'hmphed' bitterly, taking a puff of my cigarette as I passed, bouncing in the wheelbarrow uncomfortably as we made our way to the castle.

I recognized Angel and Jay as I entered the castle gates. Angel was wearing the ears of a rabbit and Jay, donning a mouse's tail, was drolling lazily on the floor, drinking from a comically large bottle. They were arguing angrily.

"You might just as well say..." Jay hiccuped loudly, " 'I see what I drink' is the same as 'I drink what I see!' "

"It's the same for you." Angel huffed impatiently, suddenly smiling as I passed.

"Cosette! What brings you here?"

"Well.." I began slowly, "I could tell you my adventures--beginning from this morning--but I can't tell you about yesterday, for I was a different person then."

"Explain." Angel now pulled out a pad of paper and a little pen.

"Well... "

"NO NO!" Jay shouted loudly, "Adventures first! Explanations take a dreadful lot of time."

Alright then. I shrugged. Off to the adventure.

I was carted into the castle, where bodies littered the floor. The carpet was red and sticky, it seemed. I frowned in confusion back at the two card men, who remained oddly cheerful, and wheeled me right up to a large throne.

I cringed, looking up in horror at a Hatter dressed in purple who was eating a porcelain teacup. He grinned stupidly, scars forming around his mouth as he chewed stubbornly. Stretched out on his lap lay who I presumed was The Queen. She was wrapped in furs and leaves, wearing an ornamental crown of flowers and carrying a scepter topped with an orchid. Her face was beautiful and fierce, her posture elegant.

Despite his initial look of being too mad to rule, however, the disheveled-looking Hatter seemed to be in control.

He was kissing her face tenderly, spreading the red dripping from his mouth unto her face. It looked peaceful enough, in a twisted sort of way, until I saw he had a silver blade against her thin neck.

Despite it, she smiled at me as I entered, ignoring The Hatter, who continued showering her in affection.

"And what can I do for you, young lady?" Her voice sang, filling the hall of the dead.

I tried getting out of the wheelbarrow, but my legs hurt too intensely. I settled and puffed my cigarette (oddly enough, I've never smoked).

"Well... I'm far from home. And a madman won't let me go."

"Tell me about it." She said sardonically. The Mad Hatter spoke up then, his voice familiar, whiny but masculine:

"You know, everything's got a moral, if only you can find it. Have you ever seen a drawing of a moral?"

I ignored him, speaking to the Queen as I ruffled my dress. The Hatter turned back to her face, too absorbed in it to hear our conversation.

"They say you are mad. I don't see why."

"I am mad because the madman loves me." She smiled wistfully.

"Do you love him back?"

"Yes. But he does not know. And he never will, until the day I die."

"Why not?"

"Because I am mad."

I sighed, placing my hands on my head in frustration.

"That's not a good enough reason."

"There is no reason. Only madness." She chuckled.

"I told you reason wouldn't suit the works!" The Hatter yelled chaotically, kissing her flesh again.

"How?" I asked then, "How did you get him to love?"

"It's quite simple, honey."

I raised my eyebrows at her quizzically.

"Legs and nails. Legs and nails."

Homer

Ow.

The car bumped me. I knew that much. But I was a little disoriented, laying there on damp pavement. I didn't have my glasses and I felt myself begin to get afraid again. Without my glasses, I was nothing, naked, a baby.

Footsteps. One pair tapping distinctively, another shuffling aimlessly.

I smiled though, for my imaginary friends were hovering over me.

"Just a cat." The Purple Man said, giggling brightly. My smile grew.

"It's a kid, Jack. I knew something like this was going to happen. The way you drive." Flower Lady's voice sounded worried and tired. I could feel her hands wrapping around my face gently. I knew then she'd seen my open, lifeless eyes, for she gasped.

"What? What's uh, wrong?" Purple Man's voice was a little farther off now. I could hear him picking something up.

"His eyes... they're..."

"Yeah. Yeah. Bright blue. He's blind."

"No, no. They're purple."

I could feel his hands grasp my chin now as I was led up, on my feet. They were a little greasy and his nails hadn't been cut in a while. But I was not frightened.

"Hey. Hey kid. You okay, hm?" He slapped my face lightly, just a pat, "Purple. Huh. I like purple. Take your shades, runt."

I smiled, feeling the contours of the glasses in my small hands. I felt a bit dizzy when I put them on, suddenly aware of a warmth dripping out of my nose. I felt myself fall forward dumbly, into gasoline smelling arms that fumbled and twitched, but felt more real than the Dad I never got the chance to know.

Ivy

"Shit. Hit him pretty hard." He held Homer awkwardly, almost how one holds a dirty tissue on the way to the trash.

I was inwardly fuming, ready to blow off like a top about how it was his fault, his damn driving. But no matter. The boy was all that mattered right now. I took over, resting him gently in the backseat. He was still conscious, just very dizzy, it seemed.

"I just wanted to get her some breakfast..." He muttered quietly.

The Joker smirked, grabbing up his make up bag from the floor of the backseat. He brought it everywhere we went.

"Uh, I'm sorry? Who?"

"Sis. I just wanted to get Sis some breakfast. She hasn't eaten... she's very worried... at the police station..."

I looked to Jack quizzically, who was nodding in understanding.

"Well originally I wanted to go get some beer and shoot out the drinkers of our new gang..." he began muttering to himself aloud, opening the vehicle's door and revving up the engine again.

"But uh, plans change."

We both knew that very well.

Two-Face

"You're a fucking idiot." I said to myself. The rookie really didn't know anything about women, except how to bash their brains in.

I respect women. I do my best not to lay a hand on them (key phrase: do my best). And not just because I'm a germophobe. The flip of the coin decides their fates.

Now I'd snuck in his room while he was out "chasing The Batman, won't be back till early morning". It was early morning. And he was gone. So I came down to check on her, wrapped up in blankets like a damn pinata. Didn't he know anything? When the woman is sick, you have be there to help her.

You couldn't leave them for the night, expecting everything to be peachy when you came back...

"May, you never call in sick twice in one month, what's wrong?"

"Nothing. Just a relapse, I think."

"Okay well... get better."

I frowned angrily, setting the little cup of tea down on the nightstand. She was sleeping, mumbling something about a Hatter. Probably delirious from fever. I felt her head and she trembled. I backed away.

What was I doing?

I'm supposed to be ruthless. I'd killed more cops and mob dealers right under the nose of the Gotham Police Department these past few years than anyone else.

That was the difference between me and the others. They bragged or taunted, leaving clues, puzzles, and playing cards. I didn't want anyone to see me, to know just what Harvey Dent had become. I wanted to remain in the shadows and brood.

It isn't hard, staying in the shadows. All you have to do is erase everything about yourself.

But I couldn't forget her.

Rachel. May. Rachel. Ivy. Rachel.

All separate, all equal, all residing in one deadly, maternal Goddess.

I hoped that kid was having his fun, "chasing the Batman", killing the ladies, and leaving his stupid poems.

Because when he got back, playtime was over. He could forget Batman for awhile.

I wanted May Queen. I needed Poison Ivy.