Merinthophobia

Jared snuggled close to Alyson. The smell of his Ed Hardy cologne made butterflies in her stomach. She let out a soft sigh and tangled her stubby fingers into his hair. Jared smiled, the grin stretching ear to ear. When she opened her eyes, her fear started to rise. Alyson could never be so close without freaking out.

"I love it when you cuddle with me," Jared whispered into her hair. Alyson's heart raced and she tried to take deep breaths. Cuddling wasn't enjoyable to her, it made her a nervous wreck. Jared knew so he eventually let her go to pushed her on the other side of the bed.

It took only a second and Alyson was already calming down. She gathered up the sheets and pushed them across her chest for coverage. Even after months of sexual activity Alyson still had a problem with exposing herself like that. Jared, on the other hand, had no shame and stood baring all. He stretched his long arms and yawned loudly.

Moments later he crawled back into his bed with Alyson. His large hand reached out and caressed her soft skin. "I wish we could do this more often," he murmured then went in for a kiss. Alyson tried not to make it obvious she was uncomfortable. It was hard for her to be intimate. The closeness always made her freak out. She tolerated it every so often, but after a hour with him, it was pressing on her nerves.

As Jared kissed Alyson's chin her brain rattled. If it was up to her they would only hold hands. Any extended physical contact could spark an attack. Jared soon sensed her tensing up so he stopped and just hovered above her.

"I'm sorry, I'm trying," Alyson's brown eyes gleamed with the hint of tears. She wanted to be normal so badly, she wanted to love her boyfriend like all her friends did. Jared just kissed her cheek and laid next to her.

Jared stared up and out his window. "There is other ways to do this, Aly. I'm sure you will enjoy them," his voice was calm and monotoned. Alyson's face turned red. She felt so silly sometimes.

Jared isn't just a boy, he was actually a man. A twenty-one year old man. Even though he was five years to her senior, she loved him. Jared made it clear age didn't matter to him but in times like that Alyson knew he was way more prepared. He was more experienced and showed her everything she knew, and now, there is supposedly more. And it scared her sometimes.

Just as Jared reached for Alyson's face, her phone rang. The surprising noise caused her to jump and panic. Quickly her fingers tapped on the iPhone and she cleared her throat.

"Yes, Dad?" Alyson asked, her voice slightly raising. Jared frowned and got off the bed to put on clothes. He tired his best not to make a single sound.

Alyson sighed. "I'm still working on the paper. I should be done within the hour," the other side buzzed in reply. "I know, I'm sorry. So another hour? Please?" Finally Alyson's face lit up and she grinned gleefully. After the responding buzz, Alyson tapped the phone and set it down.

Jared still frowned as he zipped up his pants. "This sneaking around is getting really tiring. I'm having to walk around with my head down all day," Jared slightly snapped.

"It's the only way I can see you. But when I turn eighteen, I promise no more. At least we got a hour," Alyson's voice was soft. She hated the sneaking around just as much as he did. It was the only way though.

Alyson slowly dressed, unsure what to think anymore. Jared seemed to be acting worse and worse about their relationship. It scared her, she loved him so much. She tried so hard to make everything work.

"I guess you can take me back to the library now, but remember to-"

"Take you though the back. I know," Jared interrupted. He took her hand and gently squeezed.