Ever Since You Walked Into My Life

I gently ran my fingers through Sammi's hair as I pulled each strand into my hand. Sammi's face seemed to hold a nervous smile, as I snuck a peek into the mirror. We both knew her first cheer practice was in a half hour, but I couldn't seem to get a rise out of her. Sammi had wanted to join cheer the very first day she had showed me the paper. Now, however, I felt as if she didn't want to go. After I pulled her hair into a tight, clean pony tail, I looked down at her.

"Excited for your first practice, Sam?"I smiled warmly.

She only nodded her head, which forced a small frown to crawl onto my lips. It was normal, especially for a girl her age, to be nervous about doing something new for the first time. Sammi had never been able to do sports or cheer, simply because money was extremely tight. Money would be getting tighter now that my hours had been cut, but I knew we would be able to manage. I picked up the ribbons for her hair and began to clip it into her pony tail.

"I'm nervous."Sammi admitted.

"It's okay to be nervous, hon."I evened out the black and gold ribbons with a grin."You look beautiful, Sam."

"What time is it?"She asked.

I playfully pinched her cheek and said, "Time for you to get a watch, lil' lady."

"Rascal,"She groaned.

"It's almost a quarter after, which means,"I stepped from the bathroom, Sammi at my side."time to leave."

"Oh,"She let her head drop and I sighed quietly.

"Sammi,"I began."if you really don't want to do this, I'm okay with that. I would like you to at least try it before you make up your mind. You might really like it."

"If I don't like this practice,"She began.

"Let's try your first three practices. Then, if you don't like it, you can quit."I said softly."Now get your jacket. It's time to go."

I grabbed my sweatshirt off of the chair in the kitchen, which was in desperate need of sewing. There were small rips here and there. I knew that once the winter winds caught up with me, I would have wished I had sewn them sooner. I didn't own a jacket, but Sammi did. I was sure to let her have two; one her size and one a little bigger. She would eventually out grow her original jacket, even if she stays the small girl she is now.

When she emerged from her bedroom, I stole my keys from the hook on the wall and lead us out. The drive to her school was incredibly short, but when winter was right around the corner, anyone would prefer the heat of a car than a cold, brisk wind. We arrived with nearly ten minutes to spare, but Sammi still couldn't show me her beautiful smile. I looked down at her and said, "Sam, your friends are probably waiting for you. Cheer up. It'll go fine."

"I don't know, Rascal."She frowned.

"Come on. I'll take you to get some hot chocolate after this. How does that sound?"I could spoil her for just a short time, so why not use bribery?

"Really?"I gave her a wink and popped open my driver's door.

I closed it loudly behind me and hugged my sweatshirt tight to my body. I walked up to Sammi and played with the ribbons in her hair. She didn't get the hint that I was fixing them as she quickly took off running. I heard another child call after her, so I turned and watched as she met up with a young boy. It must have been Mingus, because no other kid in their grade had long, blonde hair. I smiled warmly as the two hugged and shook my head.

I reached into my pocket for my cigarettes and absentmindly pushed one in between my lips. I lit the stick with my small flame before taking the first drag. I always found the first pull on a cigarette to be the best. I stepped closer to the two kids and gave Mingus a small wave. He looked up and asked, "Is that your mom?"

Sammi turned and I watched as her features fell. She looked back at Mingus, but never answered him. Sammi was a little nervous about telling people that I was only her sister, but I couldn't blame her. I placed a gentle hand on her shoulder and squeezed, as if telling her it was okay. Before I could answer him for her, she said, "No, that's my sister, Rascal."

I switched the conversation and asked, "You doing football little man?"

He nodded his head quickly, that toothy grin never leaving his lips. He turned when someone called out his name and waved. I puffed lightly from my cigarette as he went to meet this person halfway. I stopped, however, when the man I had seen a few days ago stepped up to him. He ruffled the blonde hair on top of his head and said, "Ready to go, little man?"

"Hey, Sammi!"She smiled as he finished with, "Wanna race to the field?!"

Sammi looked up at me, almost pleading to go with Mingus. I gave her a warm smile and said, "Go ahead."

Mingus and Sammi took off for the field, even though I wasn't done speaking with her. As they darted for the stairs, I shouted, "Check in with your cheer coach, Sam!"

I couldn't help but laugh at her enthusiasm. Sammi was very apprehensive on coming, but once she found out her friend was going to be here, her attitude changed. I shoved my free hand into my sweatshirt pocket and let the smoke from my cigarette crawl out my nose and mouth. Winter was certainly on it's way, because I could already start to see my breath. I looked back and found Mingus' father making his way toward myself.

An unlit cigarette clung to his lips as he walked up. He gave me a small smile and asked, "You have a light?"

I handed over my lighter with a warm smile. He quickly sparked a flame and pushed it back in my direction.

"Thanks."He said."Sammi your sister, or something?"

I chuckled lightly and said, "Yeah, actually. I think you're the first person who knew I wasn't her mother."

He laughed quietly and nodded his head. He stuck out his hand and said, "I'm Norman, by the way. Mingus is always talking about Sammi."

"Rascal."I shook his warm hand and smiled."And don't worry. I don't think there's a moment in the day when Sammi isn't talking about your son."

I stepped out my cigarette and shoved my hands into my pockets. I took in a shakey breath and said, "I'm going to make sure Sammi gets on the right team, so I'll see you later, Norman."

He gave me a small wave and I slowly walked toward the large cheer team. The girls chatted and giggled quietly with eachother as the coach began to take names. I looked through the crowd of girls and realized that Sammi wasn't with them. I turned toward the football field, finding that her and Mingus were not sitting with their groups. I quickly jogged to the fence and shouted, "Sammi!"

She turned her head and seemed to become a deer in headlights when I called her. I pointed a thumb behind me and said, "Come on! They're calling out names!"

She quickly said goodbye to Mingus before running toward her cheer team. Her coach gave her a comforting smile and soon came to the end of name calling. I sat down in the bleachers and crossed my legs indian style. I shivered slightly as the wind brushed passed me, molesting every inch of showing skin there was. I pulled my hood over my head and took in a slow, shakey breath. I could feel that winter was going to be utterly brutal this year.

Toward the end of practice, I took notice that Norman had slowly made his way toward the bleachers. He was standing by the fence, cheering on his son, until the half hour mark. He walked up the bleachers and offered me another one of his smiles. I gave it back as he took a seat next to me. He shoved his hands into his pockets and said, "Fucking cold out here."

"Yeah, I know. I think I'm going to sit in the car from now on."I joked.

"Or wear a heavier jacket."He chuckled lightly.

I laughed quietly as well, but deep down I could feel my conscience screaming that he was right. Norman didn't know I couldn't afford my own jacket, so I simply played it off as a joke. I shifted slightly and tugged my sweatshirt tighter to my body. Having little meat on my bones meant I was asking for a cold now. Norman and I spent the last half hour talking, but it was broken up when Sammi and Mingus climbed toward us.

"Ready to go?"I slowly got to my feet and looked down at Norman."It was nice talking to you, Norman. I'm sure I'll see you more often."

"Absolutely."He stood as well and stepped back, allowing Sammi and I to walk passed him."Ladies first."

I dipped my head low, hiding the soft shade of pink on my cheeks as we walked passed him. We stayed together as we walked toward the cars. When I unlocked Sammi's door, Norman stopped for a moment, his mouth dropping in shock. I turned, saying, "I know, it's beat up."

"No,"He pointed a finger at my car and said, "you have one of my favourite cars. What is it, an eighty five?"

"Eighty six."I laughed."But you know your cars."

"I used to have one when I was a teen."He smiled.

"What happened to it?"I shut Sammi's door and walked closer to the end of the car.

"I crashed it."He laughed."Not purposely, of course."

"'Course not."I giggled."I'll see you soon, Norman. Bye, Mingus!"

He turned away from what I presumed was his father's car and gave me a small wave. Once I had gotten into my car and slammed my door shut, Sammi turned toward me with a small glint in her eyes. Quietly, she asked, "Are we really going to get hot chocolate, Rascal?"

My car sputtered to life and I nodded my head. Sammi quickly clicked her seat belt together and began to talk about how excited she was to have a nice, hot drink. The closest place I knew that served hot chocolate was Dunken Donuts, so I made the first right at the end of the street. When I pulled into the parking lot, Sammi was already out of the car before I could turn it off. She began tapping playfully on my window as I shoved my keys into my pockets.

I got out of the car and raced Sammi to the front door. I pried it open and said, "I'll beat you next time."

"You never beat me!"Something seemed to catch her eye, because she quickly rushed inside.

I looked up after walking in and held back a girlish smile. Norman and Mingus looked up and said their hellos again to Sammi. Norman stepped forward, a cup of coffee sitting peacefully in his hand. He gave me a playful glare and said, "I think you're following me now, Rascal."

"I try to get your whereabouts perfect."I chuckled.

I ordered Sammi her hot chocolate, paid and leaned up against the counter. Mingus and Sammi sat at one of the small tables and I smiled. Norman peeked back and shook his head with a laugh. He pointed in their direction and said, "I remember being that age once."

"Yeah, me too."I crossed my arms over my chest and sighed quietly.

"How's the new town treating you?"Norman asked."Mingus said you guys are new here."

"It's going pretty well, actually."I said."Sammi made a bunch of new friends."

"How about yourself?"Norman shoved his free hand into his jeans pocket and gave me a smile."What do you do?"

"I,"I stopped for a moment, debating on telling him that I work for Stop and Shop, or that I work from home."I work from home. I sell make up for Avon."

"Oh, I never would have guessed that."He chuckled.

"Here's your hot chocolate, miss."I turned, taking the warm cup in my hands.

Norman and I walked toward Sammi and Mingus. I set her cup on the table, earning a thank you in the process. I tugged lightly on her pony tail and said, "Just be careful. It's really hot, Sam."

I turned back toward Norman, who sipped heavily from his cup of coffee. He looked down at Sammi, before flicking his gaze back in my direction. I licked over my lips, wondering what Norman had presumed I had done in the first place.

"What did you have in mind, since selling make up struck you as different."I laughed.

"I was thinking art."He said."You like to draw? Paint? Pastels?"

"I'm not big into it, but it could be because I can't even draw a stick figure right."He laughed loudly at my comment and smiled.

"You want to step outside? Have a cigarette with me?"I pulled my cigarettes from my pocket and followed him to the door.

I peeked in through the window, watching as Mingus and Sammi laughed and joked with eachother. He seemed to be a sweet little boy, but that characteristic seemed to come from his father. It had been a long time since I could sit back and talk with someone. I held a flame to both of our cigarettes and inhaled lightly on it. Norman sipped from his coffee as I said, "I'm surprised to see you at Mingus' practice."

"Why's that?"He asked.

"Well, when I grew up, the mom's took their kids to every practice."I shrugged my shoulders."Dad's were always too busy."

"I'm never too busy for him."Norman's smile seemed to fade a little."And mom is going about the world now, anyway."

"Oh,"I let my head drop and frowned."I'm sorry."

I had never meant to hit a soft spot in Norman. I was only trying to keep the conversation going. Norman quickly shook his head and said, "Don't worry about it, Rascal. You couldn't have known. Unless you stalk me from home too."

I laughed quietly and shook my head at him. I looked back through the window once more and Norman gave me a questioning look. I was only trying to make sure Sammi was okay. Even though I was right outside the door didn't mean that something couldn't happen to her. Norman took a drag from his cigarette and said, "You seem to take on the mommy role with your sister."

I looked up, finding that Norman's features fell when I didn't smile. My personal life was none of his business, but he seemed to be prying slightly. I didn't want to tell Norman all about me, especially because I knew nothing about him. The conversation broke, however, when the front door opened. Sammi and Mingus stepped out, smiling and laughing with eachother. I looked up at Norman and said, "That's a story for another day."

He nodded his head as I placed a warm hand on Sammi's shoulder. I tossed my cigarette aside and said, "You ready to go, Sam?"

It was the main reason that I didn't go out of my way to talk with people. They would dig too deep, which was exactly what I didn't want. Besides, it would be very idiotic for me to try and start a relationship. I had Sammi to worry about, not strange men. If I got anything out of this conversation, it was a good talk and that was it.