Saving Grace

It has been exactly eight months since I've last seen John, Hanna, or anyone else from Arizona. When Hanna heard that I left, she began texting me and calling me non-stop. I didn't want to talk to anyone at the time, I needed my space.

After two days of not only Hanna, but the rest of The Maine boys, minus John, calling and texting, I knew I couldn't hide forever. They all meant too much to me to just drop them from my life. I kept a steady friendship with them all, obviously not as close as before, but we were still friends.

John never contacted me. Not one call, text, email, nothing. The boys or Hanna never once told me how he was doing or anything, I guess they thought I didn't want to hear it or just didn't care, when deep down I did.

Three months ago, however, I let the question slip my lips when Hanna and I were on the phone. “How is John doing?” I didn't realize I really asked until after I got the answer.

“H-he's good,” She stuttered back, and I could tell she was hiding something from me. Of course I let the curiosity get to me.

“What are you hiding from me?”

I heard her gulp before she answered, “He uh, he has a girlfriend,”

That was the last time I ever asked about him. I didn't want to know anything else, even though so many more questions swarmed my head. How long has he been with this girl? What's her name? Do I know her? Does he even miss me?

I never asked, because I knew he was out of my life forever. At least that's what I thought.

I thought I would never have to step foot in the state of Arizona ever again. But of course life is never on my side.

Loren and Lex just had to get married now. They just had to have me be in the wedding party. Why didn't I say no? Oh yeah, because they're such good friends. I should've said no because John was going to be in the wedding party as well. I'll be damned if he has to stand with me.

Here I was, in the airport, in Arizona. Lex called me earlier saying that either her, Loren, or Hanna would pick me up. I didn't care, as long as I didn't see John.

I knew I would eventually, but I still needed time. What if he brought his girlfriend? What if he hated me?

He probably does hate me. He thinks I cheated on him and got pregnant. Hell, he probably assumed I'm going to show up with a baby in my hands.

“Oh my god, SCARLETT!”

I turned my head towards the voice to see the one and only, Hanna Roberts. Smiling brightly, I ran towards the girl and hugged her. “Han, oh my gosh, I missed you,” I really did. Hanna was my best friend, she was always there. I felt the tears coming on.

"I missed you too," she said, letting go. I saw tears in her eyes too. "I hope you don't mind, I brought somebody,"

My mind froze. She wouldn't bring John, right? No way.

I turned my head in the direction of where she was looking, to see Kennedy Brock. I felt a tear fall, and I ran to Kenny, jumping into his arms. I missed him out of everyone the most. He was my best friend, my brother basically. He called me every day, texted me all day. "I missed you," I heard him mumble. He set me down and I pulled away, looking at his face. He was crying.

"I missed you too, Ken,"

We hugged once more before going to the luggage claim. "Does it feel good to be back in good ol' Arizona?"

I chuckled at Kenny's words. Who would ever want to be here? This place was full of so many memories that now meant nothing. I wasted four years of my life on a man who ended up not trusting me. The day I met John freshman year, after moving from Texas, I knew one day we'd be together. I just knew it. It took until senior year for it to happen, but it happened. I wish I could go back and tell freshman me that just nine years later she'd be wishing it never happened.

I shook my head. "Texas will always be home," it was true. I was born and raised in El Paso, and although when I was fourteen I hated it, I loved it now. Not just because it was a place away from all the people in Arizona, but because it was home. My real home.

"Well, I'm happy you're here."

I smiled at my friend before grabbing my single suitcase. "Where are we going?" I asked.

"Well, we're going to my house to drop off the luggage, then to Lex and Loren's." Hanna said, as we walked to the car.

Getting into the familiar car, I sat in the front with Kenny in the back, and Hanna in the driver's seat. "Who's going to be there?" I just had to ask. If he was going to be there, I wasn't going. No way.

“Everyone.”

I knew that meant him too, they just didn't want to say his name. I shook my head. “I’m not going,”

“You have to, we have to talk about the wedding,” Kenny said with a stern voice.

I knew I wasn’t going to get out of it. I was going to end up going, and he was going to be there. I was going to see his face. We would probably have to talk. Oh dear god, if he had to stand with me, we would have to touch. Take pictures together, and probably smile. The thought made me want to jump out of the car and take the first flight back to El Paso.

My thoughts were cut short when I realized we had stopped for a long time. Hanna was still in the driver’s, but Kenny was gone. I noticed my luggage was gone and we were in front of Hanna’s small house. After a few minutes, I saw Kenny walk back out and into the car. “Ready, guys?”

I saw Hanna nod, but I did nothing. I wasn’t ready, actually. I needed more time. I look in the rear view mirror to look at myself as we drove to Lex and Loren’s.

I was nervous. And I don’t know why, but I wanted to impress him. I wanted him to know what he missed out on. My outfit was good, my makeup was perfect, my hair was in loose curls, and I felt pretty for once.

“You look fine, Scar,” Hanna said, looking at me before gluing her eyes to the road once more. In a mere five minutes, we were at the house. I gulped when I saw the familiar truck in the driveway. He was here, that’s for sure.

Hanna took the key out of the engine, and the three of us sat in the car for a minute. I stared at the dashboard, as Hanna and Kenny stared at me. “I-I can’t, you guys,” I stuttered, looking from the dashboard to my two friends. I really couldn’t do this. No matter how much I wished I could walk right in and show him how great my life was and what he missed on, I just couldn’t.

After five more minutes and just sitting there, Kenny said, “Do this for Loren and Lex, they really want you to be a part of this,”

Those words killed me. Kenny knew I always did whatever made my friends happy. This was Loren and Lex’s wedding, the most important day of their lives, and here I was making it hard for them because I didn’t want to face my ex. It was selfish. I had to go inside. For my friends.

“Okay, let’s go,”

I can’t believe I’m really doing this. I was a mixture of emotions. I was nervous, mad, and just flat out scared shitless. Once we reached the door, I knocked on the door, waiting for an answer. Just seconds later, the door flew open, and there stood no other than Garrett Nickelsen. The nervous frown on my face turned into a grin as I threw my arms around the boy’s neck. “Garebear!” I said, as he wrapped his arms around my waist, hugging me tightly.

He laughed at his nickname, and said, “Scar, oh my god, I missed you,” We hugged for a while longer before letting go. “You look good.” He said with a smirk, looking me up and down. I rolled my eyes at the boy and smacked his arm.

“You look good, too, Gare,” He really did. Was Garrett always this cute? I swear when I left eight months ago, he was not as hot as he was now. My thoughts were cut when I heard a faint yell.

“OH MY GOD, SHE’S HERE NOW?!”

Before we all could process what was happening, I saw a familiar long haired boy run from the kitchen area into our direction. I smiled at Pat Kirch, as he wailed his arms, before running into my arms. I hugged him tightly. “Aw, Patty, I missed you,”

“OH MY GOD, SCARLETT, THEY DIDN’T TELL ME YOU WERE COMING, OH MY GOD, WHY DIDN’T THEY TELL ME, OH MY GOD, I MISSED YOU, OH MY GOD,”

We all chuckled at the boy. I sure did miss him and his craziness.

“Where’s Jare?” I asked, looking for the red head.

“Right…HERE!” I yelped as I felt someone tickling my sides. I turned around to see my true brother from another mother, Jared Monaco. I hugged him tightly as he chuckled, “Missed you, Scar,”

“I missed you too,” I released from the hug and looked around. “Where’s Lex and Loren?” I didn’t dare ask where John was. I was hoping maybe his truck was just here, not him.

“They went with uh, John to the grocery store to get some snacks for us,” Garrett answered, flashing me his cute awkward smile. Awh.

I nodded in response, and we all found our way to the living room, were we went and just talked about all that had happened to us in the past eight months. I missed them more than I really thought. I was having a really good time, with all the guys and Hanna, until I heard the door open.

“Ahh, Scarlett!” Lex.

“Scar, you’re here!” Loren.

Silence. John.

Walk up the stairs and ignore us all. John.