Kill The Gerard

Sparks

Gerard looked up at the sky as he started down the path to the already-familiar place in the cemetery. It had been cloudy for a week now, usually storming at night but returning to an uneasy calm during the day. The silver light nearly blinded him since he wasn’t wearing his sunglasses, but he didn’t care.

A week. Had it really only been that long?

No, he knew it couldn’t be true. He stopped walking for a moment and forced himself to think, to remember all the way back to the second it had actually happened.

He wanted to cry. He had spent so much time crying that he wasn’t sure if he even could anymore, but when the tears dripped out of his eyes and splashed onto the dirt below, he knew. He sighed quietly and continued pacing along the row of headstones.

He felt his mind filling up with memories of their time together as if they were the only life experiences he had ever had. He had become a shell of his former self, so intently focused on the event that he lost sight of everything else in his life. Even now, as the black puppy they had bought clumsily ran past him to play in a mud puddle, she was the only thing on his mind. They hadn’t even been together for a whole year, he realized.

Thunder rippled through the clouds as the sky gradually darkened. A few drops of rain sprinkled around him, but his mind was so far gone that it didn’t register until the dirt around his feet had turned into mud. Tears were still lining his cheeks, landing like raindrops on the ground and reminding him yet again that he was alone.

He knelt in front of the stone and ran one finger along the grooves of each dark letter. He had memorized the features of every single one, down to the tiniest ridges. Sometimes he swore he could see her face mirrored in the smooth surface, like she was standing right behind him. He traced the familiar lines with one thin finger, sniffling a little. The puppy scampered back over to him and whimpered, begging for attention. He simply glanced at her for a moment, noting the tiny irregular white spots on her feet that they had named her for.

“I thought I told you not to run off, Sparks.”

He glanced up at the sound of the voice, standing as he did so. The world seemed to freeze as he saw her walking towards him, an umbrella in one hand and a few roses in the other, a splash of color against the gray sky. Her dark hair was curlier than usual, but she looked as beautiful as ever.

‘Lyn…’

“Hey, you’re cold.” She set the umbrella down and picked up the puppy, wrapping part of her coat around the animal so she would stay warm. “Is that better?”

‘Lyn, it’s me,’ he said hoarsely, stumbling over so he stood next to her. She knelt to the ground and placed the roses in front of the headstone, sighing.

“I miss you so much, Gerard,” she muttered. “It’s just not fair.”

‘Please don’t be sad,’ he whispered, kneeling next to her. He tried to brush her hair out of her face, but the cold locks slipped through his fingers with barely the slightest movement. He bit his lip and nearly started crying again. Her eyes sparkled with tears as well, and her hair was starting to get soaked from the ever-increasing rain.

“Everyone misses you, actually.” She let out a small sob. “I don’t know how much longer I can deal with this…Sparks even misses you,” she added as the puppy whimpered from the cold. He reached out to pet the small dog, and she licked his hand a few times, bringing a soft smile to his face. Lyn stroked the puppy’s ears, and their hands brushed in the process. She froze for a second.

“…What’s that?” she breathed. He brushed his fingers against her face, and she closed her eyes. For a single moment, he hoped she could see him, thinking that maybe it was nothing more than a horrible nightmare, but she sighed and stood, still cradling the puppy in one arm as she picked up the umbrella again.

‘No…no, don’t leave,’ Gerard pleaded. He couldn’t find the strength to stand, suddenly defeated by the rain falling through him and the horrible realization that they were separated forever. Desperate, he began crawling after her, not caring that he could see less and less. ‘You can’t leave me like this!’ He started sobbing, and soon he was crying hysterically, the barely perceptible sounds of a ghost’s tears drowned out by the pounding rain. He slit one finger open on a thorn as he blindly crawled over the roses, a few traces of long-dead blood dripping out. Finally giving up, he sat back on his heels and screamed.

Lyn folded the umbrella and placed it in the car’s trunk, hurrying back to the driver’s seat and placing Sparks inside before climbing in as well and closing the door. The puppy leapt over to the passenger window, yelping at something outside. She clicked her seatbelt and started the car, glad when the heater kicked in and began warding off the chill from the rain.

“Calm down, puppy. There’s nothing out there.”

She turned back to face the windshield and nearly screamed. Thin lines of blood had been traced on the window, quickly being washed away by the rain but still readable. Tears came to her eyes when she saw it.

I love you. Take care of Sparks.

xoxo

g.

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♠ ♠ ♠
By me.