You've Got Me, Right Where You Need

Josh Franceschi.

I remember the first time I saw him. I was 14 and it was the first science lesson of year 10. The teacher sat the class boy girl and I was put at the front next to josh. I wasn’t to happy about it cause I didn’t really know him, plus he had a bit of a rep for being a ladies man, and a bit of a player.

When I first saw him he had short brown spiky hair that was gelled to make it look like he had a hedgehog sitting atop of his head. “Hey” he sung to me, no doubt trying to impress or grab everyone’s attention around him like he usually did. I just smiled at sat next to him, trying to keep myself to myself. He was everything I wasn’t, part of the `popular` crowd, talked to everyone and was just so confident and outspoken.

I on the other hand sat there in silence, counting down the minutes until I could leave the lesson and speak to my few friends. I wasn’t popular at school at all. I mean I had friends, but we were considered the weird kids. We dressed differently and listened to different music to everyone else. That seemed to give them the right to treat us like outsiders or just ignore us.

As the year went on, josh changed a hell of a lot. He grew out his hair and actually started talking to me like I was a human being. He was also in my French class; coincidentally we sat next to each other there as well. He would ask me my opinion on his hair, and what he should do with it. I told him without thinking he would take notice, but he did. We would talk about bands and music, and for those few hours a week we spent together, he made me feel important. Like maybe I wasn’t the weird girl. That’s when I really looked into his eyes, and saw just how blue they really were.

And no matter what anyone said, josh was smart. He just liked to fuck around and put on a show for everyone else, but when he actually got down to it, he could do the work no problem. That’s why the teachers kept us together for so long, they said I brought out the best in him.

But outside of class was a whole different ball game. It went back to normal, almost like I didn’t exist. It didn’t bother me at first, I understood, he had his friends and I had mine. But then it did start to bother me, and I didn’t know why. I wanted him to notice me other than the times we were forced next to each other; I wanted him to see me. It wasn’t until the end of year 10 I realised I might have had a slight thing for him. He’d grown up over the year, and he looked good. At first I dismissed the idea, blaming it on the fact I liked his new hair, and how much it suited him, but as we rolled into year 11 I couldn’t deny it any longer.

I didn’t tell anyone though, not even my best friend. I just sat admiring him from the inside. In year 11 we were moved away from each other. In French I now sat behind him, next to one of his friends. This meant he turned to talk to him, and still talked to me sometimes. But in science we were sat on opposite sides of the room. One upside was that he had moved into my maths and P.E. class, so I saw him more than last year. As year 11 went by, I grew to like him even more, still not admitting it to anyone.

At the end of the year we both went to separate collages, and I had nether seen or heard from him since. Until this very moment. His hair was still long but it was styled better than I was used to. He was tall, really tall, and well built. I felt the butterflies go mental in my stomach and grimaced. This was the last thing I needed. Josh looked like he was trying to place me still. I smiled lightly at the fact he was so confused.

I could understand why he didn’t recognise me at first. At the beginning of year 10 I chopped all my hair off. It was down just past my waist, but I had it cut into a bob type thing. Short up the back, and a little longer at the front. I kept it like that for a while, but then I got bored and tried to grow it out again. But the end of year 11 it was just past my shoulders. Now it was back to its original length once more.

I led them up to one of the studios on the first floor, and was just making sure they had everything they needed. “Actually, do you like a sofa the something the guys can sit on?” tom asked while his team were setting things up.

“We don’t have a sofa up here, but there’s thing in the other studio you can bring across. Im not to sure how to explain what it is though, come see” I walked to the door and tom shouted over to josh if he could help them bring something in. He nodded and they both followed her into the opposite studio.

“Ahhh that’s perfect” tom smiled, pointing over to the huge cream thing in the corner. Im not to sure what it is to be honest. It’s like a massive bit of wood on wheels with a cream coloured cushion covering the whole thing.

“Good, ill go open the doors fully, so you can get it through.” When I came back, they stopped whispering to each other and smiled at me nervously. I just shook my head and helped tom wheel it through to the other room, whilst josh laid on it. Typical.

We set it up against the wall whilst all the boys were telling josh off for not helping. After asking one last time if they needed anything, I started to make my way out and back to the reception.

“Violet Simmons” josh shouted from across the room. I turned and he was running towards me. My heart rate sped up and stayed that way the whole time he spoke to me. “I thought I recognised you, is it really you?” he seemed so happy he had now remembered who I was.

“It’s me” I said weakly.

“It’s so good to see you” he exclaimed and pulled me into a hug. I wasn’t to sure what to do at first. Me and josh had never hugged before, but I just went with it, wrapping my arms around his waist. I could feel my face burning, and willed it to stop, but it didn’t. “You look great” he smiled and pulled back,

“y-you too” I tried to smile but I wasn’t to sure how it came out.

“Hey listen, we’ll catch up soon yeah?”

“Sure” he smiled one last time and went back to join the rest of his band mates. I left the room in a daze, but was quickly snapped out of it. As I reached to top of the stairs I saw a few more models coming up. I waited for them to come up because the stair case isn’t exactly the biggest, and when they got up to the top, they didn’t even acknowledge my existence.

“no problem, it was pleasure” I smiled at them before retreating back down the stairs and back behind my desk. Zahra was back, looking through the record book. Her eyes lit up and then she jutted her lip out.

“Barns is already here?”

“Yeah, I took him up about 15 minutes ago”

“Ohhhh who did he have with him?” she asked eagerly.

I racked my brain trying to remember the name of the band, but then remembered he never actually told me. “Um I don’t know the name of the band, but I know the members are josh, dan, max, Chris and matt” her eyes suddenly widened and she grabbed her phone out of her bag. She pressed a few buttons and shoved it in my face.

“Was it them?” and sure enough it was. I nodded and she started bouncing and squealing. “That’s you me at six, and their upstairs? I cant believe it”

“I take it you like them then” I said raising my eyebrows at her.

“Are you kidding? They are my favourite band in the world”

“Well why don’t you go see if they need anything?” She didn’t answer so I looked up at her. She was staring at me like I had just told her to go upstairs and rape them. “Just go, im sure barns would like to see you”

She took a deep breath a stood up. Once she was at the bottom of the stairs she stopped.

“Come with me”

“No, I have to man the desk” I said with a wink. She just shook her head and made her way up slowly. She didn’t come back down for about 20 minutes, and when she did, she looked she had smiled and the wind had changed so it was permanent. While she was up there Ella-may had come and told me that the look shoot was finished, and to tell Zahra she could go when she got back. I was left with waiting for barns to finish and then locking up.

The stick people had left without so much as a thank you, and Ella-May had also gone. I told Zahra to go, and I went up to wait for tom to finish.

“Ok that’s a wrap” he called and everyone started to pack away. I watched form the corner and then followed them out as they packed the stuff into the van. “Thanks for today Vi, im booked on for Monday, so ill see you then yeah?”

“Will do” I smiled and he held his hand up for a high 5. I slapped his hand and walked home through the Friday afternoon hustle of everyone wanting to get back early for the weekend. I looked on as the office women in their pencil skirts and red lipstick tried to walk in their stupidly high heals.

Ive never understood that. Why wear heals for a job where no one is going to see your shoes. You’ll be sitting down all day. They were just trying to fit into the office vibe I guess. Something I could never do. Sometimes I do like my job; at least I have Zahra to keep me sane.

The more time it took me to get home, the angrier I got. There were people with earphones in, blaring there music really loud with no regard for anyone else. People were pushing past me, rushing to get where they needed to be. Why was everyone always going 75 miles an hour?

Soon enough I turned into my street, where no one else was. I walked along staring up at the clouds; they had just the right amount of puffyness today. I smiled at the sky before a certain blue eyed boys face crept into my mind and wouldn’t leave.