Every Storm That Comes Also Comes to an End

I'm so sorry, Alex. I'm so sorry.

That voice. That sultry, beautiful voice that I've listened for since I was in high school. Is she here? I tried to grope around in the dark, but my body stayed immobile. Everything was black. Why can't I see anything? Why can't I move?

This is all my fault. You did this because of me...I'm sorry, Alex.

Where is she? Where's Avery? My cold fingers tried to grasp onto her, to hold her in my arms, but she slipped out of my grip like water. How come she's slipping away?

I never meant for this to happen. Please, don't ever do this again.

Is that worry in her voice? I once again tried to move, twitch, anything, but my body wouldn't allow me to. I try to think of why I was so unable to move, vaguely remembering Avery and that guy when I went grocery shopping. And then I had come home...

I need you. I know a lot of things happened between us, but I need you.

And I had taken all those pills. Am I still at home, lying unconscious? Or did...or did...I hear a faint beeping behind the voice of Avery that was flitting through my brain. Am I in a hospital? Or am I dreaming I'm in a hospital?...

You can't do things like this. I love you and I can't lose you.

If I was unconscious, the air would have left my body. Is Avery talking to me right now? Her voice sounded so real, so close, but I couldn't reach out and grab her.

Please...don't leave me.

I try to cry out for her name, call out for my Avery, but my throat stayed clamped shut. My hands fell short in the dark as I try to grasp her again, keep her close to me and keep her tight in my arms. But she was moving away, fading and fading until she was just the wind in the air. I tried to shout back for her, bring her back to me, where she belongs, but she was too far away.

I was left in unsettling silence again, my body suspended in a black void. Time seemed endless as I sat, my thoughts the only thing to keep my occupied. But only one thing would stay in my mind, one thought that refused to float away: Avery.

I kept picturing her with that guy. That guy who looked so familiar.

The way he just bent down and pecked her face, almost like he was so confident that she would allow him to, it just made my blood boil.

I felt myself grimacing in my timeless sleep, even though my face made no movement. The muscles stayed glued to their expressionless form. I could feel myself breathing, but I couldn't feel my chest moving up and down with each breath.

Suddenly, I felt a tug.

Like a rope was tied around my waist, pulling me back to reality. A light was blinding me, like one of those lights at the end of a tunnel on the freeway.

It was so bright, I felt the need to put a hand in front of my face to cover it, but my brain didn't respond to the request. My eyes were slowly peeling open, but squeeze shut at the sight of a super white ceiling. The faint beeping from before was now more audible, louder than before. It was right next to my ear, a constant tempo in time with my heart.

I open my eyes centimeter by centimeter until they were fully open, my pupils dilating until they adjusted to the change of light. My throat was really dry and scratchy and my wrist hurt, like something was poked into it.

I force my head to move to the right, my back creaking.

At the side of the bed sat Jack in a chair, his legs strewn across the arm-rests and his head propped against the back. His mouth was open, soft snores spewing.

I was in a hospital.

The idea of my location dawned on me. I make a weird nose, my hand reaching up to scratch at my wrist. I had to go find Avery. I had to know if what she said was true. "Fuck!" I yell, attempting to pull the needle out of my wrist.

I was unsuccessful.

But I was successful in waking Jack up, his body jumping three feet in the air. He looks over at me, his eyes widening when he sees me awake, and trying to get out.

"No! Alex, no!" he shouts, reaching out to pull my hand away from my wrist.

"Jack! Let me go! I have to talk to Avery!" I yell back, desperate to get my wrist free.

He growls, catapulting at the bed. He gets on top of me, trapping my legs with his. "Alex! Stop!" He struggled with me for a few moments, finally prying my hand away from the needle, holding my arms against my chest. "Stop! Leave it alone!"

"I need to talk to Avery!" I hiss, kicking my legs to try and get him off of me. "She was here! I heard what she said to me! I have to know if it's true!"

Jack seemed like he was at war with himself. "Alex..."

"Get off!" I screech, thrashing about, almost managing to get him off, but he stayed put.

"She was never here, Alex!" he screams back, his face defiant. My thrashing ceases. "Avery never came. We called, but she was...she was out on a date and didn't come."

My heart sinks to the depths of hell. A place that sounded really appealing to go to right now. My body goes slack, mine and Jack's breathing heavy as he cautiously releases my hands from his make-shift binds. He gets off of me, pulling a hand through his hair as he keeps his gaze on my steadily.

"She..." I swallow. "She didn't come?"

Jack hesitates, but shakes his head. "She said...she said she might visit later."

I could feel tears fill my eyes and I close them tight. "But...but...I heard her..." I cry out desperately, my orbs finding Jack again. "Jack, I heard her talk to me! I heard her voice!" I grab hold of his arm, my voice loud.

He sighs, his face pained. "You must have dreamed it up, Alex. It must have been a dream." I whimper lightly as he pulls me into a hug, my tears spilling out onto his shirt.

The door opens and I bolt away from my best friend.

"Avery?!" I ask hopefully, my face bright.

But it was just Rian. I fall back against my pillows, my arms crossing over my chest. "Sorry," he murmurs, coming in and closing the door behind him. I wipe at my nose as he comes over to stand by my hospital bed.

"Alex," Rian speaks, but it was soft, "the nurse gave me news today." I look over at him, disinterested. "You have to stay for another week, just to make sure the drugs are out of your system."

"But..." I gasp. "We leave for tour tomorrow."

Rian nods slowly. "I talked to Matt and Keith. We cancelled it."

I suddenly felt an overwhelming feeling of guilt. "Guys, I am so sorry. I never meant for this to happen. It was...it was an impulse, I don't know what I was think - "

Jack puts up a hand. "It's fine. We're more concerned about your well-being. I know the fans and music are number one, but...we kind of can't go on tour if our lead singer isn't there." He gives a lame chuckle, but a frown stayed on his face.

I nod, staying mute.

"You want us to bring you something?" Rian asks quietly after a tense moment of silence.

I shake my head, turning away from them so my back was to them. "Right now, I just wanna be alone. As my friends, please grant me that one thing."