Every Storm That Comes Also Comes to an End

The phone call with Avery left me a bit disoriented for a few days. I didn't really know what to think; what was she about say before Caitlyn interrupted? I was probably getting hopes up for absolutely nothing. Again.

Nevertheless, I stuck to my plan of trying to move on. I hung out with Jack and Zack a lot, even calling up Cassadee a few times and chilling with her.

I also was writing a lot more, carrying my notebook around with me a lot in case inspiration struck. I found myself waking up in the middle of the night a lot and writing in the dark, sometimes striking gold or erasing the words I had written half-asleep, deciding they were shit. It was funny how much I was writing lately. I felt a permanent cramp in my hand, having finished eight songs already.

And one morning, I walk into the kitchen to see Jack sitting at the table, staring off into space.

"Jack?" I call as I grab a box of Frosted Flakes from the cupboard. He snaps his head over to look at me. "You all right, buddy? You seem a bit off." I pour some of the flakes into a bowl and walk over to the fridge to grab some milk. I could feel Jack's gaze on me as I did this, so I turn to look at him once again. "Seriously dude."

"Sorry," he voices, snapping out of whatever reverie he'd caught himself in. "I...I just zoned out." He leans his elbow on the table in front of him, biting at his bottom lip.

"Something bugging you?" I ask, a bit distracted as a few lyrics materialize in my brain.

He shakes his head. "Actually, something is."

I take out a spoon and shovel some cereal in my mouth, crunching and thinking about how the next part of the song in my head would go. "What's up?" I ask him, squinting as I mentally cut out a guitar part I had been experimenting with in my mind.

"Uhm, well, Alex...I don't know how to say—"

He stops talking as I mutter a few words to the song in my head, groaning at the fact that it doesn't flow. I look back at Jack, frowning. "Sorry. What were you gonna say?"

"Look," he exhales slowly, "this is gonna be hard to take—"

"What do you think of a song being called The Reckless and the Brave?" I ask him suddenly, completely forgetting that he was actually speaking to me first. "I mean, it's kind of rough, but I still think it could be a hit. Do you wanna hear a chunk of it? I have the notebook in my room. One sec—"

"Avery is here in L.A.!"

I freeze from my spot by the counter, my foot poised to walk toward my bedroom. I could feel my heart give out and my head slowly turns to look over at Jack. He was looking at me, hesitantly, as if waiting for me to explode.

"What?" I ask quietly, but it felt mute to my ears.

He breathes out. "I've been sitting on it for a couple days now, but I had to tell you. I mean, she didn't necessarily say I couldn't tell you—"

"JACK!" I scream before I could stop myself. "Why is she here?"

"She got a job offer," he explains, swallowing. I try to relax my face so I wouldn't scare my best friend further. "She moved here to L.A. for the job. She...she didn't want to tell you, I guess. She said I could, but I didn't feel right about it." He pauses. "Look, I told you because I think you two need to talk everything out. It's time you to fucking worked through whatever the hell is going on, because not only are you and her miserable, but everyone around is fucking miserable too."

I groan out, pulling a hand through my hair. "There's a reason I moved here though! She can't be near me, Jack. I ruin everything for her and I can't do that anymore! I'm like poison in her life; I can't believe she actually followed me here—"

"Alex," Jack cuts in again. "You aren't poison. You're her everything."

"No, I'm not," I mutter, sagging back against the wall. "She hates me, Jack. She hates me. I did the worst possible things to her. She'll never forgive me."

"You'll never know if you don't try," he retaliates.

I didn't really know who to respond, so instead, I shake my head and push away from the wall. I retreat into my room, where I stayed for the rest of the day. I didn't leave unless I had to pee or wanted food. I came out whenever Zack was over, but that was rare, so I was able to stay within my four walls.

A few weeks later, my mind absent of Avery because I had forced her out of there, I decided I was going stir crazy in this house. I needed to leave. So I put on a new shirt and bustled out, my notebook in hand.

Jack wasn't even home, so I was able to leave in peace.

I didn't really know where I wanted to go. I just kind of drove, gazing around at the different shops. Finally, I found a Starbucks, which would just have to do.

Inside, it smelled like coffee and all I heard was light chatter and the tapping of fingers on keyboards. I ordered a hot mocha before finding an empty table in a corner, pulling my pencil out of my pocket and flipping my notebook open to my last page. I've been working on this Reckless and the Brave song for a few weeks now, and I think it might just be what I've been looking for. Who knows, but I think it's pretty fucking catchy.

About fifteen minutes pass before I look away from the paper in front of me, stretching my arms and letting my gaze sweep around the other customers. There were a few old ladies gossiping in the big leather chairs, a few men with laptops, and some teen girls giving me flirty looks from across the store. I roll my eyes.

But then my eyes land on a hunched figure.

My eyes blow wide as I realize who it is, my jaw dropping slightly. She was facing toward me, but her head was angled down so she was looking at the table surface.

How did I not notice her come in? I've had an Avery-radar since high school, always knowing if she set foot in a room or if she was near. I guess this song-writing has me so engrossed that my mind slipped of the fact that she was here, in L.A.

She looked good.

I blow out a breath, debating whether or not go over there. Maybe she didn't see me? I mean, if she had seen me she wouldn't have just ignored me, right?

I shake my head. Just go over there, Alex. Jack was right.

You'll never know if you don't try.

I finally stand, shutting my notebook and tucking the pencil in the spindled spine. I hesitate before forcing my feet to walk forward, inching closer and closer to here table. She didn't look up, obviously quite interested in the surface of her table. I grin upon arriving in front of her, her body still hunched. She hadn't noticed me yet.

"Hey, Avery," I say softly, her body jumping at the sound of my voice.

Her head moves up swiftly, her throat swallowing as we lock eyes. She seemed a bit nervous, but it cooled off as she kept her gaze on mine. "Hey, Alex."

I smile, pointing to the chair across from her. "Is this taken?"

She shakes her head, tucking hair behind her ear. "N-no, go ahead."

It was weird, I had to admit as I sat down, to be talking with her. It had only been a few weeks since I'd seen her in person, but that doesn't mean I was still used to having a civilized conversation with her. None of our conversations had been civilized back in Baltimore after she returned, so for this discussion to start off so normal seemed...unusual. But I let that though go away as I look at her.

"How've you been?" I ask gently, leaning forward so my elbows were resting on the table. She looks back at me, her face blank. I don't know why she seemed so guarded, but I don't voice it. She probably has her reasons.

"Okay," she nods. "Still a bit uneasy about the move, but all right."

I nod. "It's scary moving all the way across the country."

We sit in silence for a few moments, trying to get used to being around each other again. It was weird to be able to look into her face; it was almost overwhelming.

I was trying my hardest to keep my cool. I wanted so badly to just yell and scream and cry about how much I loved her and missed her and I how I need her just as much as I know she needs me. But she's moved on, or at least is trying to move on, and I know I need to do the same. No matter how hard it may be, it's time we—

"Are we just gonna ignore the giant elephant in the room?" Avery suddenly exclaims.

I snapped out of my reverie real quick. "What?"

"The fact that you just abandoned me in Baltimore without so much as telling me yourself. You had Jack tell me. How was that supposed to make me feel?" Her announcement sort of caught me off guard, my jaw gaping at her.

I didn't know what to say. I had so many things I wanted to say, how I didn't abandon her, how I left for her own good, but those words died on the end of my tongue.

What was I supposed to say?