I Need You, Just Like You Need Me.

Rory's POV:

We walk out meeting the others. Everyone was in the lake, except Pat who sat on the edge watching. John turned to me, "Gonna go in ?" 

I shook my head, "Nah, I'm going to sit  with Pat. I'll come in later."

"Okay, you better." He bit his bottom lip, smiling.  Then he turned, taking off for the  lake.

I brought myself down to the warm grass, with a smiling Pat at my side. "Why aren't you swimming?" I ask him.

"Lake is too cold. What about you?" 

"Not feeling to great." 

"Aw, I hope you feel better." Pat smiled, one of his sweet smiles. Even though every smile on Pat was sweet.

"Thanks." I leaned back, resting my head on the hard ground. I squeeze my eyes shut, the feeling of how uncomfortable I was washed over me. It was insanely hot out, and this shirt wasn't helping anything. I couldn't take it off if I wanted to, there were so many cuts on my stomach. I started destroying the part of me I hated the most.

After almost an hour,  I  still was so far out of my contort zone. I decided I was going to go back inside, i needed to  make myself feel better. And that consists of bringing pain to myself. I opened my eyes, and I saw John walking over. He came and sat next to me, "It's later now."

"I don't want to go in." I stood up.

John brought himself to his feet, "You have to, stop being lame." He gripped  the sides of my shirt, attempting to pull it off. I grab his hands, trying to pull him away. 

"John stop!" I yelled at him, "I'm not going in!" 

He let go, I ran into the house. I made it to my room, as fast as I could. I grabbed my clothes and my bag, I went into the upstairs bathroom. I fanatically locked the door, and  grabbed my razor. My eyes were welling up with tears, they spilled out once the blade slid across my wrist. I swiped the sharp blade across my hip bone a couple times. 

There was knocking at that door. I was so caught off guard, I dropped the razor. A voice came through the door, "Rory, Are you okay? I had no right to force you to do anything... I'm sorry." 

It was John.  

I picked up the razor, then running water over it, to clean it off. I tugged  my pants on over my fresh cuts, it stung. I wiped my eyes before opening the door. John was leaning against the door frame, "Hey." 

"Hi." I looked at my feet.

"I'm sorry Rory." He placed his hand  under my chin, he moved my head up to look at him.

"It's okay, it's not a big deal." 

"You were crying." It was a statement, not  a question. 

He was staring into my eyes. I could tell my eyes were red, and cheeks were stained with tears. But I decided to lie anyway,  "No." 

His eyes flicked away from mine, Then back. "Don't lie to me Rory." He grabbed my hand, pulling me out of the bathroom. We walked in to his room. He sat me down on his bed, he leaned down meeting my eyes with his. "Rory, we never lie to each other. Even over something little like crying. Please don't ruin that, don't lie to me." 

John was making me feel worse, I felt the tears creeping up again. I didn't want to lie to him, about anything, but I had to. I thought about everything I was hiding from him, I closed my eyes, feeling the tears slip out. Johns arms were suddenly tied around me, and I hid my face in his neck.  "Its okay Rory." He whispered to me, as he held me tight.