Caught Like A Fly

The entire ride back to Vegas seemed much shorter than the ride to L.A. Ally's words were echoing in the back of my mind, and before I knew it I was back at the hotel and sitting in the parking garage, still straddling my motorcycle. I must have been really zoning out because I didn't see the black figure stalking towards me in a swirl of pure fury.

"You, come with me," said Ronnie, sticking his pointer finger in my face. I gave my keys to the valet boy and followed him without saying a word. People said Ronnie had a real temper now that he was out of prison, but I think it was always there only now he isn't high. He walked to one of the many lounging areas of the hotel and rounded on me. "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"Excuse me?" I asked, feeling my heart beat faster. Ronnie was one of my best friends now, and more of a brother to me than anyone had ever been. Hearing those words leave his mouth hurt.

"Do you think before you do things, or do you just do them?" he asked, ignoring my question entirely. "I told you that if you hurt Jacky we were going to have some problems."

"I'm not hurting him!" I exclaimed, my voice rising. He didn't let me continue and laughed dangerously.

"Really? You really think that?" he said, really beginning to piss me off with that laughter. "What, so Jacky was just going to put his reputation on the line for some quick fuck? He was going to suffer through watching the girl he loves date someone else and take her sweet fucking time in dumping her boyfriend so he could deal with that asshole later?"

"No, it's not like that--"

"It's EXACTLY like that!" Ronnie shouted, taking a step closer to me. "Choose. Right now. I'm not as nice as Jacky, so I will not let him be miserable anymore because of you."

"He's not miserable! He would tell me!" I argued angrily, fists on my hips.

"Connor or Jacky. Now."

"Connor was in the hospital, Jacky completely understood--"

"Done. You picked Connor," Ronnie said quietly, his eyes boring into my skull. "If it's not a wedding rehearsal, leave him alone. After this wedding, you will neversee or talk to Jacky again." I don't think I was breathing anymore, and while Ronnie was staring me down, I heard a voice with a British accent call my name. Each of Jacky's footsteps was like a knife to my chest as the realization that Ronnie wasn't messing around settled in. It was a good thing a majority of the hotel guests were in their rooms or out on the town at this late hour.

"Am I interrupting something?" Jacky asked, eyeing us both warily. He must have known I would be back soon based on when I texted him that I was leaving.

"Go ahead, tell him," Ronnie said, the strain in keeping his voice down was obvious. "Tell him how you picked Connor over him. Again."

"Wait, what the fuck is going on?" Jacky asked and fear flashed on his face for only a moment before it was replaced with concern. "Andy, what is he talking about?"

"He's being ridiculous," I scoffed, folding my arms tightly across my chest. "Like I told you earlier, Connor tried to kill himself--"

"Connor again," Ronnie interrupted, but I kept talking over him.

"I only wanted to make sure he wasn't going to die--"

"Look at that, Connor over Jacky, once again."

"It's my fault!" I shouted, feeling my eyes start to water. "He tried killing himself because of me!"

"And last but not least, you are putting Connor's feelings over Jacky's," Ronnie finished, glaring at me now. I looked over at Jacky for some kind of support, but he looked like he was going to be sick. "Well?" I opened my mouth to say a snappy remark, but it was Jacky who spoke.

"After everything," he began, looking at the floor, "and you still care about him that much?" When he looked up at me with a face full of suspicion, distrust and anger, the tears couldn't well up any more before spilling over onto my cheeks and down my face.

"This is stupid," I said, my voice cracking. I sat down hard in one of the soft chairs behind me and stared at my knees.

"Ronnie's right, Andy, but do you want to know what's really fucked up?" Jacky asked quietly in perfect imitation of Ronnie's pissed off whisper. "That asshole had been cheating on you for over a year before we hooked up." My breath caught in my throat, but I didn't turn to look at him. "They met the year before last on tour, and they'd been together behind your back the entire time." My eyes were dry now, and I couldn't blink, I couldn't breathe. By the time I worked up the courage to turn around in my seat, they were gone.

"Jacky?" I called out quietly, but no one replied. "Ronnie? Oh my God..." I pressed the heels of my hands into my eyes, and hunched over to rest my elbows on my knees. The tears came back and fell freely down my arms. "You're right, Ronnie. There is something seriously wrong with me."

* * *

The days leading up to the wedding were slipping by, and Ronnie wasn't kidding when he told Andy that he wasn't going to let her talk to me. Not that I was doing a whole lot of talking these days anyway. The horrible feeling in my stomach when Ronnie pointed out how she was continually putting Connor before me never really went away. Every time Andy was in the room, it was like someone took their hand and twisted and tangled their fingers in my gut, and I relived that fall tour over and over again.

First I would picture her lying on the bar floor, and then I saw her playing my guitar because her old band lost hers. I smiled when I remembered her chasing and shrieking at Connor for interrupting what would have been our first kiss, and I smiled even wider at the best three-second kiss ever. Maybe I didn't understand how she could still care about Connor because I wanted to marry Marianne, but when she left me Andy was my cure-all and I wouldn't even dream of being with her again. I should have known her unofficial break up with Connor wouldn't last.

The way I told her that Connor had been cheating on her for so long wasn't how I had planned it. I was so pissed that I hadn't demanded that she break away from him forever that I thought she simply needed to know. I was walking the loop downstairs when I saw her sitting alone in the same place Ronnie had confronted her. I couldn't help myself and I walked over to her.

"I'm not supposed to talk to you, remember?" Andy said bitterly, her arms crossed and her knees pulled up to her chest.

"Knock it off, this is not how we should be dealing with this," I replied, and she looked up at me. Oh, God how I missed her. "The wedding is in two days."

"Why didn't you tell me that Connor was cheating on me?" she asked, ignoring my last statement. "That's kind of an important bit of information, don't you think?"

"Okay, I was going to try and be nice, but I guess that's not working," I snapped. "I was nice and I let you break it off with Connor when you wanted to. I was nice and I tried to understand that he was still your friend, but you know what? Being nice has done nothing but make my life miserable, so I'm done being nice to you, Andy."

"Wait, what?" she asked, that nasty, sneering demeanor gone as if it never existed.

"I'm going to make you work for it," I said, a light bulb flickering on in my head. I took her hands and made her stand and brought my face so close to hers that I could feel her breath coming through her nose.

"Y-you're going to make me work for it?" she stammered, and tried to close the distance between our lips but I stepped back to avoid her, and came right back and put my hands in her hair, cradling her head. "Work for what?"

"I think you know," I whispered in her ear, and ghosted my lips over her neck, collar bones and to the other side of her face before stepping back again and this time walking away. A shudder wracked my spine, making my exit less dramatic, but it was hard to be that close to her and remember what normally happens when I do that. I was headed straight to my room to take a cold shower.