Caught Like A Fly

I rode up the elevator, fighting the urge to go back down and just do what I wanted to Andy, and ran to my room. Ronnie was in there watching TV so he could monitor whether my "ex" girlfriend tried sneaking in, and gave me a strange look as I came through the door.

"Dude, are you okay?" he asked, and I shook my head. "Did she kick you in the nuts or something?"

"No, but now I know why all the teasing should be left up to girls," I groaned, lying on the sofa.

"Blue balls suck," Ronnie said, smirking at me. "I thought I told her not to talk to you, but it looks like you did anyway."

"I gave her an ultimatum," I said, feeling the pain slowly ebb so I could sit up. "She's going to have to prove to me that I mean something to her, and it's not going to be easy."

"I'm not going to lie, I'm kind of excited to see where this leads," he laughed, turning the TV off. "I say we go swim and I'll send her a picture of you dripping wet."

"I don't think that'll do anything but piss her off," I scoffed, and Ronnie laughed again.

"You see, I have a fiancée that has given me an insight to the female mind," he began, lowering his voice like a nearby woman would overhear. "We really can torture them! Besides, I heard her mention once how sexy you were when you got soaked in Seattle looking for her."

"This is a terrible idea."

"Let me have my revenge!" he shouted suddenly. "She's my friend, too, and I stood up for her when she didn't deserve it. It's just a picture, and I could be a lot meaner." I sat and thought about it, partly waiting for my balls to stop hurting and partly wondering how nasty Ronnie would be to her if I didn't let him have his fun.

"Ugh, let's go before I change my mind." I wanted to go swimming anyway.

* * *

Oh, we're playing this game, are we? I thought deviously to myself as I watched Jacky's back. I hoped he could feel it burning, because I was not happy. Viv and Rachel came out of one of the elevators that Jacky obviously hadn't used, chatting happily and smiling.

"There you are," Viv said, narrowing her eyes at me. "You look terrible. My wedding is the day after tomorrow, you can't look this bad."

"Jacky just gave me an ultimatum," I said, barely believing the words as they left my mouth. Rachel's eyebrows shot up, but Viv's expression didn't change. "I have to work for it, whatever the fuck that means."

"He wants to know that you care," Viv said right away, and tilted her head to the side. "Well, he wants to know how much you care. What you're willing to do to get him back. Normally girls do this to guys, but you've always said you hated being treated like a lady."

"It's stupid, right? This will blow over and things will go back to normal?" I asked, waiting for confirmation. "Right?"

"Hey Rach, can you get us some coffees? I don't think you'll want to be around for this next bit," Viv said, and Rachel held up her hands like she agreed and quickly headed to the exit. "Don't take this personally."

"Here we go," I muttered, waiting for the same lecture I got from Ronnie.

"There are hundreds, if not thousands of girls prettier than you, nicer than you and better for Jacky than you," Viv began emotionally, and I had to consciously stop my arms from crossing. "Out of all of those girls, he picked you. No, you didn't win him over, and no, you didn't lure him in so well that he would never leave.

"Jacky is like any other guy. He wants--no, needs--to know that you want him, that you love him. Yeah, sex and making out is fun, but believe it or not, they want more than that, just like we do. Being in a band is hard; there are a lot of nice, genuine girls that will play with them and drop them as soon as the next big thing comes along. You should know. Think about your old band mates, and how you would feel if say, Vinny had a girlfriend who kept her ex-boyfriend in her life. Not only that, but still close enough to him that she would make Vinny so insecure that he would deal with anything just to keep her around."

"Vinny isn't like that," I interrupted, but Viv glared at me. "Fine, I would be pretty pissed."

"Exactly," she said, and folded her arms like I was supposed to know what she meant.

"Are you trying to say that I'm...that I'm making Jacky...insecure?" I asked, the word tasting weird in my mouth. Insecurity was never a problem of mine. It was hard to for me to comprehend the concept of insecurity. "Insecure as in he thinks I'm going to leave him or that he isn't good enough? That kind of insecure?"

"You really can't tell, can you?" Viv asked, searching my face for something. "Are there emotions that you do understand?"

"Ouch," I said, fighting to keep a smirk from my face. "I think I get it now."

"Let's hope so," she snorted. "Ronnie wasn't kidding when he said he wasn't going to let you talk to Jacky."

"I'd like to see him try."

"He bought Jacky a one-way ticket to London."

"WHAT?!" I shouted, my eyes almost popping out of my head. "Are you fucking kidding me?!"

"You'd better get your shit together, or he's coming to the airport with Ronnie and me when we leave for our honeymoon," she said, and Rachel stepped tentatively towards us, a coffee tray in her hands with three cups. "In other words, you have three days."

Rachel and Viv both left to go think of ideas for the bachelorette party tomorrow, leaving me alone. People seemed to be doing a lot of that lately. I let my feet lead me to an empty chair, and my head was reeling. I missed my parents. I missed my brother and sister, who were both on the east coast going to college. I missed my guitar. I missed my band, even if Connor was in it. My eyes were welling up with tears of sadness and longing, but I blinked them back and made my way to the gift shop. They were bound to have a notebook and some pens. I needed to write something, anything. I stopped dead in the doorway of the little shop with overpriced wares as a single thought dominated my mind. I didn't need to write. I needed Jacky.