Rhinestone Eyes.

July 20, 2011.

Sierra could feel goose bumps rising on her skin. She could feel a cool breeze. There was a faint beeping near her body. She heard the slow humming of faint voices. She wanted to open her eyes but her eye lids were so heavy for some reason. She felt a hang holding hers, a hand that was shaking from fear or nervousness. She was conscious, but not.

She tried to sit up and failed to do so, it felt as if she hadn’t used her body in days. Her head was pounding and her arm held a small spot of pain. She felt like she was floating on water, in the sea. Drifting away, falling and rising with every wave, every current. It almost felt as though she herself was not real.

A familiar voice tried to call her name, asking for something from her. The voice grew in her head, no longer echoing away but clear and soft, still familiar. She waited to hear the voice again; the voice filled her heart with warmth. But this voice seemed to be praying, or asking.

The waves beneath her body stopped, the sea fell from beneath her. The pain in her arm stung again. She wanted to cry out but could not.

“Please.”

She wanted her eyes to open, she fought for them to open, she wanted to see, being blind scared her, and for a moment she thought that she had gone blind. She heard a chair scoot across the floor and the hand still held hers but now someone was resting their head next to their hands. Still mumbling.

Her eyes opened just a bit, vision was blurry. She tried again. She could not rub her eyes to help them wake up. She looked down at her arm, realizing there was an I.V. in her arm. She nearly shuttered at the realization that she was in a hospital bed.

She looked down to her hand to see the back of Danny’s head. She smiled a bit and tried to move her hand until she did. He looked up at her. And he smiled despite the fact that he looked horrible. Tired, sick, worried, scared. He stood up and kissed her on the forehead. She tried to smile but failed to do so.

“She’s awake.”

He looked toward the door and James walked in followed by Sam and Ben. She actually did smile, very wide when she saw him. He smiled too happy to see her eyes. He made his way over to her side and kissed her. She wanted to bring her hands up to cup his cheeks but she couldn’t.

“I… It w-was all a d-dream.” Her voice was hoarse.

“Wha’ is it? Wha’ was?”

She smiled feeling at home.

“Nothin’. I wanna go ‘ome.”

“You are… Soon. I ‘ope.”

“I wan’ to see my baby boy.”

“Oh. Well. ‘Es actually ‘ere. We ‘ad to stop the tour… For you. You got sick. Yeh overdosed.”

Her smile soon faded.

“M, sorry.”

He leaned down close to her and put his face into the crook of her neck.

“Don’ apologize. Yeh came back an’ tha’s all tha’ matters.”

“I did, ‘ome back.”

“You did… I’ll go ge’ Tommy… ‘ll be righ’ back.”

Soon after he left nurses started to get her ready to leave. They took out her I.V. and disconnected a few things; Danny helped her into a wheel chair, she almost fell but she made it to the wheel chair.

“If you would please just take her down to the first floor, as you exit the emergency room there is a desk to the left side where you can sign her out, no big deal no problem and you can leave immediately.”

“Thank you…” They went down to an elevator and down another hall way, Sam and James following. Ben, Tommy, and Madison were in the waiting area. They soon signed Sierra out and as they left Tommy ran to her asking permission to sit on her lap and he did so, kissing her then hugging her and telling her that he hoped she feel better. He had missed her. They went outside where she could see the tour bus parked out in the lot. But they went the other way and around a corner. When they turned the corner Tom came into view and so did Matt. Sierra turned around to look at Danny.

“You’re goin’ ‘ome, ‘ome. Until Warped is over yeh stayin’ with them.”

“But I-“

“No. Your goin’.”

Sierra turned around and looked forward; Tommy had gotten down and ran over to Matt. Tom overlooked Sierra, didn’t say anything but certainly wanted to.

“Alrigh’ until wer’ done ‘ere she’s good to come stay with you?”

“Of course. Family is family.”

They went closer to what was obviously a rental car. Sierra said her goodbyes, even to Ben who she promised to phone every night. Her suitcase was already in the car and they left quickly, Tommy sat in the back seat with Sierra. The car ride was quiet, so was the plane ride, and then that car ride home. They got to the house and they had a bit to eat. Carol came to get Tommy just for a few days. Tom had told Sierra she could stay in the guest room. Tom had obviously been staying in the living room judging by all of the pictures of him and Oli, young and old, torn apart family albums and year book pages. Matt of course was staying in his room. It was late now and Sierra was finally walking around and feeling better. When she looked out her window the sun was just about to burst from the earth. She walked out of ‘her’ room quietly and down the hall to Matt’s room. She knocked and walked in.

He was only smoking and had nothing to hide anyway. She sat down on his bed and looked around.
They didn’t speak to one another at all. He continued to smoke from his pipe until it was cashed. The light was off and the T.V was on. Soon Sierra cuddled up into his pillows and covered herself with his blanket. He climbed into the bed with her and hugged her around her waist. He nuzzled close to her and held her. She spent her first sleep home in his bed.

She felt good being close to him.