Status: complete
Remembering the Ghost of You
April 16th, 1944
April 16th, 1944
Today there was a mandatory practice for all soldiers providing the social with music. Our group was the last of three which meant we’d be playing for the last two hours. I didn’t know if I knew that much music but Ray reassured me that he could always do some instrumental pieces in between songs I sang. I felt good hearing that, but that feeling quickly disappeared when I saw Mikey and Frank walked into the practice area.
“What are you doing here?” I asked and he lifted up a case; a guitar case.
“Frank’s father let me borrow a bass guitar. We are going to be playing with you at the social,” Mikey explained and I grit my teeth. Our grandfather had taught me and Mikey about guitars when we were little but I lacked talent or patience for it. I’d rather draw or sing. That’s why I was put into choir. I didn’t like to be the center of attention but I sure liked to be heard. Mikey knew guitar and in high school learned some bass guitar.
“Great guys!” Ray said eagerly while I stood back and sulked.
“You’ve just gotta accept it,” Bob said from behind me.
“I know, but it’s hard,” I said. I had yet to see Mikey in his uniform and was afraid that when I did I’d lose it completely.
“You’ve got a really good voice,” Frank said after we practiced. We had done ballads and patriotic songs. Then they’d just play some random stuff and I’d make up words. It did go pretty well even though I couldn’t get thoughts of how stupid Mikey was out of my head.
“You aren’t too bad yourself,” I said which caused him to beam.
“Thanks!” he smiled and I offered him a cigarette as I took one out. He took it and followed me over to the bench by the outside of the mess hall. That’s where we’d be holding the social. I had kind of wanted to be alone, but Frank said quietly so I decided I wouldn’t express wanting him to leave.
“Are you leaving anyone behind?” I asked suddenly. I didn’t even know why I wanted to know.
“Like a girl?” he asked and I nodded.
“Nah. I’m only sixteen,” he said but for some reason I felt like that wasn’t the whole truth. But I didn’t pry. “You?”
“No,” I told him. I hadn’t bothered much with girls. I was quiet and did my work and then was pulled into the army. I didn’t have much time for girls in the past. But part of me didn’t really care that I didn’t.
“Mikey told me how he likes that girl next door to you guys. He plans to tell her when he comes back,” Frank said and I felt bile rise in my throat. He shouldn’t have to worry about things like surviving. “I’m sorry!” Frank exclaimed when he saw the distressed expression on my face.
“No it’s okay,” I lied and stubbed out my cigarette. “You should head home. It’s getting late,” I told him as I stood and headed for home. A bus would be faster but I was dreading going home. I felt like if I walked time would move slower and me leaving wouldn’t come so soon.
“Goodnight Gerard!” he called and I just waved.
I was surprised to find Rebecca sitting out on her front steps. She waved and I sat next to her. It was late.
“Hey,” I said and she took the cigarette I had taken out to smoke. I’d never seen her smoke. I’d rarely seen any girl smoke. But she didn’t cough the way Frank did so I assumed this wasn’t the first time.
“I promised myself I’d stay composed, but the truth is I’m terribly worried about you and Mikey,” she whispered.
“Don’t,” I pleaded but she turned to look at me with sad eyes. I pulled her in for a hug.
“It’s just so dangerous and I don’t know how life would be without you guys around. You’re like brothers to me and Samantha,” she said, her words coming out choked.
“Don’t think about it,” I said quietly. Her small frame started to shake as she cried.
“I don’t want to lose more people I love,” she sobbed.
“Neither do I.” I wished that I could promise her that we’d have a safe return, but I knew that would just be wishful thinking. The chances of coming back weren’t the best.
“I hate war and I hate the disgusting people that drive the world to it,” she cried and I hugged her tighter. We all did and that’s why we were fighting. We had to rid the world of the Nazi’s before they took over the world.
I don’t know how long I let her cry, but when she finally pulled away and wiped her eyes on a handkerchief she was holding my cigarette was long gone.
“I want you to take this with you,” she said at last and handed me a worn photograph. I smiled when I remembered the picture. When I was in seventh grade, Rebecca’s father bought her and her sister a little plastic swimming pool. The summer was a hot one and the four of us spent almost every afternoon in it. In the picture me, her, Samantha, and Mikey stood in the pool eating watermelon.
“Thanks,” I said and she smiled.
“Don’t forget us.”
“Rebecca, I never will,” I reassured her.
“I can’t believe you are leaving so soon,” she said and gazed out at the moon. I nodded.
“I wish I wasn’t,” I said.
“Be safe.”
“I’ll do my best.” We then sat in silence and stared out into the night sky. I couldn’t believe that I was leaving so soon. It felt like yesterday I learned that I’d be joining the army. No matter how much you don’t want things to happen time always seems to catch up with you in the end.
Today there was a mandatory practice for all soldiers providing the social with music. Our group was the last of three which meant we’d be playing for the last two hours. I didn’t know if I knew that much music but Ray reassured me that he could always do some instrumental pieces in between songs I sang. I felt good hearing that, but that feeling quickly disappeared when I saw Mikey and Frank walked into the practice area.
“What are you doing here?” I asked and he lifted up a case; a guitar case.
“Frank’s father let me borrow a bass guitar. We are going to be playing with you at the social,” Mikey explained and I grit my teeth. Our grandfather had taught me and Mikey about guitars when we were little but I lacked talent or patience for it. I’d rather draw or sing. That’s why I was put into choir. I didn’t like to be the center of attention but I sure liked to be heard. Mikey knew guitar and in high school learned some bass guitar.
“Great guys!” Ray said eagerly while I stood back and sulked.
“You’ve just gotta accept it,” Bob said from behind me.
“I know, but it’s hard,” I said. I had yet to see Mikey in his uniform and was afraid that when I did I’d lose it completely.
“You’ve got a really good voice,” Frank said after we practiced. We had done ballads and patriotic songs. Then they’d just play some random stuff and I’d make up words. It did go pretty well even though I couldn’t get thoughts of how stupid Mikey was out of my head.
“You aren’t too bad yourself,” I said which caused him to beam.
“Thanks!” he smiled and I offered him a cigarette as I took one out. He took it and followed me over to the bench by the outside of the mess hall. That’s where we’d be holding the social. I had kind of wanted to be alone, but Frank said quietly so I decided I wouldn’t express wanting him to leave.
“Are you leaving anyone behind?” I asked suddenly. I didn’t even know why I wanted to know.
“Like a girl?” he asked and I nodded.
“Nah. I’m only sixteen,” he said but for some reason I felt like that wasn’t the whole truth. But I didn’t pry. “You?”
“No,” I told him. I hadn’t bothered much with girls. I was quiet and did my work and then was pulled into the army. I didn’t have much time for girls in the past. But part of me didn’t really care that I didn’t.
“Mikey told me how he likes that girl next door to you guys. He plans to tell her when he comes back,” Frank said and I felt bile rise in my throat. He shouldn’t have to worry about things like surviving. “I’m sorry!” Frank exclaimed when he saw the distressed expression on my face.
“No it’s okay,” I lied and stubbed out my cigarette. “You should head home. It’s getting late,” I told him as I stood and headed for home. A bus would be faster but I was dreading going home. I felt like if I walked time would move slower and me leaving wouldn’t come so soon.
“Goodnight Gerard!” he called and I just waved.
I was surprised to find Rebecca sitting out on her front steps. She waved and I sat next to her. It was late.
“Hey,” I said and she took the cigarette I had taken out to smoke. I’d never seen her smoke. I’d rarely seen any girl smoke. But she didn’t cough the way Frank did so I assumed this wasn’t the first time.
“I promised myself I’d stay composed, but the truth is I’m terribly worried about you and Mikey,” she whispered.
“Don’t,” I pleaded but she turned to look at me with sad eyes. I pulled her in for a hug.
“It’s just so dangerous and I don’t know how life would be without you guys around. You’re like brothers to me and Samantha,” she said, her words coming out choked.
“Don’t think about it,” I said quietly. Her small frame started to shake as she cried.
“I don’t want to lose more people I love,” she sobbed.
“Neither do I.” I wished that I could promise her that we’d have a safe return, but I knew that would just be wishful thinking. The chances of coming back weren’t the best.
“I hate war and I hate the disgusting people that drive the world to it,” she cried and I hugged her tighter. We all did and that’s why we were fighting. We had to rid the world of the Nazi’s before they took over the world.
I don’t know how long I let her cry, but when she finally pulled away and wiped her eyes on a handkerchief she was holding my cigarette was long gone.
“I want you to take this with you,” she said at last and handed me a worn photograph. I smiled when I remembered the picture. When I was in seventh grade, Rebecca’s father bought her and her sister a little plastic swimming pool. The summer was a hot one and the four of us spent almost every afternoon in it. In the picture me, her, Samantha, and Mikey stood in the pool eating watermelon.
“Thanks,” I said and she smiled.
“Don’t forget us.”
“Rebecca, I never will,” I reassured her.
“I can’t believe you are leaving so soon,” she said and gazed out at the moon. I nodded.
“I wish I wasn’t,” I said.
“Be safe.”
“I’ll do my best.” We then sat in silence and stared out into the night sky. I couldn’t believe that I was leaving so soon. It felt like yesterday I learned that I’d be joining the army. No matter how much you don’t want things to happen time always seems to catch up with you in the end.