Status: complete
Remembering the Ghost of You
Greta's Letter to Gerard
Dear Gerard,
Words cannot even express how grateful I will always be for you. When I was growing up most people talked about how they hated America and everything the soldiers did to Germany. My father said to never believe the people until I met an American myself. I never thought I would.
Looking back, I feel like I spent most of my life locked away keeping quiet and hidden. Sometimes I'd dream of going to America, to New York where everyone was free and I didn't have to be stuffed into a tiny room. I had hopes and dreams like anyone else.
Those dreams died when I watched the German Nazi's shoot my friends and families. We didn't do anything and yet we were being punished for it. I didn't understand. I still don't. I'd question it every night; why me? But there weren't answers for those questions. I worked hard, watching people die every day from cold and sickness. All the people there talked about was how we were all going to die there. It was the end of the line.
Sometimes I'd hear whispers from the older women of how they dreamed of the day some American or Brisith soldier would come and whisk them away to a better time. I thought I knew better and knew not to believe in those silly kinds of dreams. My father had always said to believe and dream big since I couldn't read the future, but in there starving and freezing, I forgot how to believe that it would get better/
I got sick and they put me in a hole in the ground. I told them it was okay to let me die. I had accepted it and was okay with it, but they said the Russians and American soldiers were coming. I didn't believe it. No one did, but those were the rumors.
When you pulled me out of that hole I thought you were a prison guard come to kill me. It wasn't until you carried me out that I realized you were someone different. I cried on the inside. I kept waiting for you to let go and leave me with the others, but you didn't. It was more then I could have asked for. Everything I'd ever head about American's was completely wrong.
Thank you for taking care of me. I didn't even dare to dream that I'd ever get to leave Germany, but then I went to Paris. It was the most gorgeous thing I'd ever seen even if it was hurt by the war. I never thought I'd see that city.
You were so kind for taking me into an actual home. It reminded me of my early memories of home. Warm and inviting.
Esmerie is the sweetest person I've ever met. I was so happy to fall asleep and wake up with her always next to me. It was warm and nice.
And then the ocean. That was my greatest wish ever. So thank you. I know that my time left is limited. I wish so much that I could spend more time with you and Esmerie, but I know you'll be okay without me. I will never forget you or your kindness.
Looking out this window and seeing the dark blue water sparkling in the sunlight and hearing the birds and watching Esmerie run around the grass collecting flowers; it makes it easy to forget the past. I used to have nightmares every night, but not anymore. Esmerie is comforting. This place is comforting. Everything feels peaceful now and it's wonderful. I didn't know I'd feel this feeling again.
Do not let my death sadden you. I want you to remember the good times which is what my mama always said when she tucked me into bed. Always remember the things that make you smile so that you can smile in the morning. I have smiled enough to make up for the years I lost being shut away.
I will look down on you forever and I hope to watch you and Esmerie grow old and happy and enjoying life. This time, this war, it was filled with darkness and sadness, but for me you were the light at the end of it.
So thank you for saving me. I wish you ever happiness in the future and hope that you will not forget me. You will always be my precious American soldier.
With many thanks and love,
Greta
Words cannot even express how grateful I will always be for you. When I was growing up most people talked about how they hated America and everything the soldiers did to Germany. My father said to never believe the people until I met an American myself. I never thought I would.
Looking back, I feel like I spent most of my life locked away keeping quiet and hidden. Sometimes I'd dream of going to America, to New York where everyone was free and I didn't have to be stuffed into a tiny room. I had hopes and dreams like anyone else.
Those dreams died when I watched the German Nazi's shoot my friends and families. We didn't do anything and yet we were being punished for it. I didn't understand. I still don't. I'd question it every night; why me? But there weren't answers for those questions. I worked hard, watching people die every day from cold and sickness. All the people there talked about was how we were all going to die there. It was the end of the line.
Sometimes I'd hear whispers from the older women of how they dreamed of the day some American or Brisith soldier would come and whisk them away to a better time. I thought I knew better and knew not to believe in those silly kinds of dreams. My father had always said to believe and dream big since I couldn't read the future, but in there starving and freezing, I forgot how to believe that it would get better/
I got sick and they put me in a hole in the ground. I told them it was okay to let me die. I had accepted it and was okay with it, but they said the Russians and American soldiers were coming. I didn't believe it. No one did, but those were the rumors.
When you pulled me out of that hole I thought you were a prison guard come to kill me. It wasn't until you carried me out that I realized you were someone different. I cried on the inside. I kept waiting for you to let go and leave me with the others, but you didn't. It was more then I could have asked for. Everything I'd ever head about American's was completely wrong.
Thank you for taking care of me. I didn't even dare to dream that I'd ever get to leave Germany, but then I went to Paris. It was the most gorgeous thing I'd ever seen even if it was hurt by the war. I never thought I'd see that city.
You were so kind for taking me into an actual home. It reminded me of my early memories of home. Warm and inviting.
Esmerie is the sweetest person I've ever met. I was so happy to fall asleep and wake up with her always next to me. It was warm and nice.
And then the ocean. That was my greatest wish ever. So thank you. I know that my time left is limited. I wish so much that I could spend more time with you and Esmerie, but I know you'll be okay without me. I will never forget you or your kindness.
Looking out this window and seeing the dark blue water sparkling in the sunlight and hearing the birds and watching Esmerie run around the grass collecting flowers; it makes it easy to forget the past. I used to have nightmares every night, but not anymore. Esmerie is comforting. This place is comforting. Everything feels peaceful now and it's wonderful. I didn't know I'd feel this feeling again.
Do not let my death sadden you. I want you to remember the good times which is what my mama always said when she tucked me into bed. Always remember the things that make you smile so that you can smile in the morning. I have smiled enough to make up for the years I lost being shut away.
I will look down on you forever and I hope to watch you and Esmerie grow old and happy and enjoying life. This time, this war, it was filled with darkness and sadness, but for me you were the light at the end of it.
So thank you for saving me. I wish you ever happiness in the future and hope that you will not forget me. You will always be my precious American soldier.
With many thanks and love,
Greta