Been to Hell

It was three weeks later when things finally began to seem normal again. We both had a job at the same place, and I felt completely great. No more pain from my old wounds. No more depressed Zane. Nothing was out of the norm, we are perfectly fine now. It even seems as though his father wasn’t after us anymore, but that was a pitiless thought. I know for sure that it is only his wounds slowing him down, when he is well he will be out to get us yet again. So, we both agreed that it would be in our best interest to make as much money as we can. We will need to run soon, it will be nice to have the money we will need.

“Are you not hungry?” My friend Daisy asked, picking at her salad as well. I felt Zane’s eyes bore into my back. Like he was worried about me for some reason. But I was used to it by now, I was still adjusting to working all day. Well night to be exact, third shift sucks. “He’s watching you like a hawk, does he not trust you?”

I took at sip of my hot tea, enjoying my break. I didn’t like her butting into my business, but I ignored it for now. “So what, he can watch me all he wants.” It was true, he has watched me for so long now. It was normal for me, maybe not for her but I couldn’t care less.

“Good.” I heard him chuckle from behind me, I just about jumped out of my seat. My tea bounced over the edge of the cup and dripped onto the crappy table. He chuckled again then sat next to me, pressing his lips to my cheek. “We’re getting out early today, Chad asked.”

“Cool.” I smiled, leaning onto his shoulder. He smiled, and wrapped his arm around my waist. I couldn’t wait to get home and curl up into bed. “I can’t wait to go home.” He just nodded.

After another two hours of packing ice cream into shipping boxes, not only were my hands pure ice but I was just about sleeping on my feet. Zane met me outside of the locker rooms and just about swept me off my feet. But he got stopped by our boss screaming NO PDA (Public Display of Affection).

“You okay, baby?” He purred as we walked out. His hand tightening around mine. I tipped my head up to his, kissing him on his cheek.

“Ya.” I smiled. “Just tired. When we get home, I’m crashing.”

By home, I meant our two room apartment. It was all we could afford. This apartment consisted of a kitchen and a bathroom. The bed pulled down from the wall and it sat in the middle of the kitchen, the bathroom had a tub and a crappy toilet. We didn’t bother getting something nice, we knew we would be leaving soon. The only true bad thing was the fact that the one window was broken. We used cling wrap to keep the heat -from the stove- in the ‘house’. If we got cold -which I often did- he turned on the stove and laid the bed down. That way the heat poured out on my side of the bed. He would wait until I was sleeping to turn it off. He was really a thoughtful man, I felt like I should be giving more to him.

“I’m going to cook some oatmeal, I’m hungry. So you should probably wait for food.” He got to our new crappy truck and hoisted me into the front seat. I still hated the fact that I was to damn short to get in on my own. It sucked.

We got this truck from a friend on the way back to Michigan, just before we got into Detroit. Zane traded it for the van because we could fit more things into the back, like a bunch of blankets. I found it hard to sleep in the back of the van, it was to small for the both of us. So really, we only traded cause it had a topper on the back, where we could make a bed.

The only thing that this new mean green machine needed, was a heater. It was like I was doomed to a world of cold. But spring was on its way, and the snow was beginning to melt. I can’t wait to walk in the grass barefooted again.

When Zane crawled into the driver’s seat, I laid down across his lap and tucked my face into his stomach. He stroked my hair for a moment, which only made me more drowsy. I let out a little yawn, and tucked closer to him.

“Hon, you can’t sleep right now. You know I demand a seat belt.” He chuckled. It was true, I was not allowed to ride without a seat belt now. Ever since that crash that totaled the last truck, he was a paranoid person. But I didn’t blame him.

I whined a bit, but still sat up. Strapping the uncomfortable buckle around my waist and slumping down in my seat. He mocked my, but still started the tuck and took off. Light country music played in the background, and Zane hummed along with it.

It was nice knowing that a normal life was starting for us again. Here, no one knew about our past. No one judged us. All they knew was what we told them, which was that we were a married couple that have had a rough winter. That’s how we got our job actually, by telling them that we needed to pay for a house to live in. That we were homeless, and we in desperate need. By some stroke of luck, our boss had a heart. He not only found us jobs, but also our crappy apartment. We were completely devoted to him now, and he knew it.

Since the apartment was only a few blocks away we were there within five minutes. Finding the last parking spot, and rushing to get inside. This part of town was dangerous, and we weren’t the type to take chances anymore. I was happy this was all we really had to worry about for the time being.

All I was thinking about when we got inside was curling up in bed. Not necessarily going to sleep, but just soaking up the heat of the stove. But, Zane shooed me into the bathroom and gave me my pajamas. I could almost laugh at him, but then I realized how soft those pajamas were and I was in them within two minutes. Before I walked back out, I brushed my teeth and washed my face. It was nice feeling somewhat clean, but I was to lazy to draw a bath and clean the rest of my body. I figured I could save that for the morning.

Zane was in his pajamas when I stepped out as well, but he had given up on waiting for me. He was just brushing his teeth in the kitchen sink and heating up water on the stove for our oatmeal. Smiling to myself, I walked up behind him and wrapped my arms around his waist from behind. Burring my face in his back and kissing his shoulder blades. It was nice when his pajamas were only flannel pants.

“You feeling okay?” He questioned, resting his toned arms on top of mine. Gently rocking us, and slowing turning me around so he could face me. “You’re really pale.”

“I’m fine.” I promised, resting my head on his chest. Rocking with him, really wanting him to pull down the bed. My feet hurt and I’m really just ready for bed.

His fingers grazed over my shirt, feeling the scars. I could tell he was still worried about a lapse in progress, that I was going to collapse anytime and we would have to make an emergency trip to the hospital. It was saddening to know that he was still worrying about my health, I really wanted him just to worry about our next move.

“Maybe you should just let me work, I’m worried about you.” He hummed, reaching over me to yank the cord that lowered our bed. I didn’t want him to be this worried, I liked helping him at work. But he was right, it was draining a lot out of me. But I think it was just because I wasn’t use to it yet, I don’t want him to have to do everything by himself. “Not just because of your health, but because you are loading things into those trucks all night. If something happened out there I wouldn’t know. You could get kidnapped…sorry, I didn’t mean to bring that up. But it is true.”

“Don’t be sorry. Besides, I like helping out.” I informed, jumping when he swept me off my feet and lowered me into the bed. Tucking me into the nice covers. “Would you like me to ask for an inside position?”

“No, its almost worse in there. Fights break out all the time, I don’t want you caught up in that. I’d rather you stay home.” He stirred the oatmeal, almost like he was scared to make eye contact with me. “We’ve made it on only my pay role before, we can do it now.”

“Are you that worried?” I questioned. I didn’t like him being this worried, that leads to depression. If he was going to drop into that, it was worth quitting my job for. I cannot have him getting down, it hurts me to see him working though that. Like a stab to the heart.

“I just like knowing that you are safe. I just don’t think you are safe there.” He informed, turning off the burners and pulling a couple bowls out of the cupboard. “I know you would be board here, but I just think it’s a better bet for both of us. Besides, I don’t like you working. Makes me feel kind of useless.” He handed me a bowl and dropped an ice cube into the mushy food. I stirred it, waiting for it to cool down a bit so not to burn my mouth. “Please, you would be sleeping when I am working anyway.”

“I guess if you are really worried about me.” I sighed, still stirring my food. He nodded and sat down next to me, pulling part of the blanket over his head. I felt like I should be giving more of a fight, like I should be angry that he wasn’t going to let me work anymore. But I learned a long time ago that I should just let him have his way. He likes having his own way, so I will just let him. There was no point in arguing.

“Thank you. I’ll find a book or something for you to do well I’m sleeping during the day.” I can’t believe he had talked me out of it already.