An Unwanted Love

School was awful. Simply awful. Every girl I met wanted to be the one who got past my walls and showed me how to love or some shit like that and every guy wanted to be my ‘bro’. Jesus Christ, why are humans so boring and annoying? Everyone is the same. There is no variation, and nothing to catch my interest. No one worth a first glance, let alone a second look.

Really, though, the longer I was here the more I learned. Not information from a classroom, but about people. There were the classic stereotypes, emo kids, jocks, whatever the fuck else. It’s odd. They speak of helping, of being good, being humane, but then separate themselves from others and ostracize those who aren’t in their group. I had heard of the in-group bias before, and witnessed it previously, but in children it’s disgusting.

Well, I guess they aren’t children, after all some of them are old enough to be legal adults, but they behave as they did when they were children. Growing up isn’t just getting old enough to drive or be independent, it’s being able to make decisions and act responsibly. No one, from what I have seen, in this school would last if not for their precious mommies and daddies. They greet their friends with insults, and greet those they dislike with a smile. They offend as a joke and joke as an offense. Back handed compliments, full out fake personalities. No wonder so many worry of what the world is becoming, because it is becoming what these people are; full of falsity and hatred.

Yet, people call me cruel.

The world really is a strange place.

As of now I was in a computer programming class and apparently the teacher is just now teaching how to program a simple script, something I have been doing for years. So, I was dead bored and her voice was like nails on a chalkboard. Dacen was to my right and Ashlee was across from us, and they were both paying close attention thus providing no entertainment. Very inconvenient. Really, what good are ‘friends’ if they don’t do anything?

Apparently Dacen and Ashlee once dated, which is weird, but explains why she is so clingy. Now they are strictly friends, but ten bucks that they are fucking behind closed doors. Actually, in the past week of watching and listening, and being forced into acquaintances with these people, I had learned quite a bit about the group that centred around Nathan and me. For example, everyone knew Dacen. I mean everyone. Also, everyone liked him. He was an avid partier behind his parents backs and was, put simply, that kid parents warn their children to stay away from. But, he seemed the perfect son, straight A’s, captain of the Lacrosse team (which will soon be Nate) and liked by literally everyone. So, of course, his parents didn’t know a thing about his drinking, smoking, bedroom or party habits. I hated all that instant attention he brought, but Nathan loved it.

Nate was already at the top. He was quarterback and captain of the varsity football team, after he was allowed late tryouts and showed up half of the team. He was already second best in class, he was the king of the school. Just like I told him. Everyone already loved him.

Of course, I juxtaposed him. I rarely associated with anyone, even my cousin, and only spoke if it was to answer a question by a teacher in class. Unfortunately, somehow it made me popular. Some shit about being ‘mysterious’. New kid, keeps to himself, bad ass, unemotional, uncaring, et cetera. All of those characteristics girls, and some guys, linked to that coveted prince charming. My ignoring them and being as big of a douche as possible at every chance I got only seemed to make them think I was scared to get attached, or whatever it is people delude themselves into thinking. When I became top of the class and wiped the basketball court with the team captain in a ‘friendly preseason, intra-team game’ during conditioning I just gained more unwanted attention. When it got out how musically inclined I am, it just continued to escalate.

Finally the bell rang, letting us out to go to the next class. I left quickly and avoided everyone. Of course, as always, it seemed, Nathan found me, and soon after Dacen showed up. A few followers were, well, following them. The four of us ruled the school, and now I was forced to drive Ashlee around as well. Thankfully, though, that also meant I drove my motorcycle more often since it was no secret I hated putting up with Ashlee longer than absolutely necessary.

Somehow I escaped Nathan and the others, slipping with the crowd to some hall that was out of my way. I kept walking and just started meandering, not really caring where I was going. I had the keys to the car, so it wasn’t like I could miss my ride.

“Hey! Rave! Wait up!” I heard a voice call after me. I didn’t slow down or stop walking, I just continued on as though I didn’t hear him. Sadly, the kid caught up. “I’m having a party this weekend, and Nate already agreed to going along with Dacen and Ashlee. So, I can expect to see you there, right?” I shrug, and turn around on my heel to go down some other hall before he can react and follow. Sometime after that I find my way to the car without any other interruptions.

“We’re going to a party tonight.” Nate informed me as soon as I was within hearing range. Lovely.

“No. You’re going.” I corrected him.

“No, we are going. It’ll be fun.” Nathan said, Dacen and the whore agreeing from the back seat as we all got in. I ignored them the rest of the way home and, once I had pulled into the driveway, I left again on my motorcycle. It was time to explore on my own.

A few hours later I arrived back home and go in only to get ordered by Nathan to get changed and ready for the party. I was hoping they would have left. Or died. But, sadly they hadn’t, so I trudged upstairs and looked for an outfit. I pulled on a black wife beater, a black, dark grey and bright blue plaid button up flannel shirt that I let unbuttoned, black fitted jeans and my black and bright blue vans. I pull on my usual beanie again after shaking out my hair and go back to the chill room where the other were.

“Looking good, Rave. Hoping to get some?” Nathan asked when I walked back in. I noticed Ashlee looking me up and down, and Dacen seemed to be checking out my ass. Oh yeah. He knew I usually dressed well, but when I planned to have fun beyond the party as well I would put a bit extra effort into the ensemble. Just, he was wrong on one point. I didn’t ‘hope’ to get some. I always got some.

“There’s no hoping involved, Nate. If I want it, I get it. No ‘if’, ‘ands’ or ‘buts’ about it.” I told him, smirking. Ashlee looked slightly surprised at my response. I had forgotten how little they knew about me, and how they hadn’t heard me speak enough or hang around them enough to find out how egotistical and cocky I truly was. Well, they got to find out.

“So true,” Nate laughs, “send your rejects my way, okay? I need some fun for the night.” I shrugged and he took that as consent.

We headed out a few moments later, and I went to my bike calling over my shoulder that I would see them later.

“Why…” Dacen started, but decided not to finish.

“When we got out to a party, well, let’s just say it’s lucky if one of us comes back, so we both need a ride. Plus, he likes his bike better. And it attracts more girls for him to choose from.” Nathan explains for him. Dacen just nodded. I followed them since Dacen was the one giving directions and when we arrived I deemed it to be a stereotypical teenage house party. Great.

We walked in, and that was when things changed.