The Highs of Lowlives

When we arrived at the Whiskey they placed me across a table to have Eva and Nix hold bottles of Jack and vodka over my mouth and pour both in. I drank enough down but the rest just spilled over my face, neck and chest.

“Body shots, my favourite,” Nikki jumped onto the table and licked all my exposed flesh of the alcohols, its like he’d gone into sex over drive recently.

I pulled him down onto me and wrapped my legs around his waist, connecting our lips like a hungry leopard. This continued until the bar staff ordered us off or out, our choice.

“So when you getting’ hitched?” Eva laughed at Nikki and I with our arms around one another.

“As soon as I dump your mom. But she’s so damn hot I don’t think I can,” I smirked at her.

“Damn, you’re doin’ Eva’s mom too? I thought I was the only one,” Nikki squeezed me.

Eva glared at us.

“Fuck no, we have threesomes with her!” Envy called out.

We all got a good laugh at Eva. She hated those jokes.

“So the demo is done. Congratulations,” Tommy changed the topic of conversation.

“Here, here,” Nix raised her glass, “Now fuck you guys, I’m goin’ to get me some cock.” She downed her beverage and skipped off into the darkness.

“Stop starin’ at her ass,” I muttered playfully before biting Nikki’s neck.

“Why would I check out her ass when yours is mine,” he squeezed my hip as I was sat on my ass.

“Oh its yours? I didn’t get that memo,” I raised my eyebrow with a small smile upon my lips.

“I’d prefer if it was just mine,” his voice glided down my ear like something hot and syrupy.

“Are you implying I’m your woman?”

“I’m saying you should be my woman. Sound like a good idea to you or what?”

What a proposal. I rolled my eyes, “Romantic mother fucker. Yeah ok,” I laughed lightly and took my chance to straddle his lap.

We made out and poured Jack down each other’s throats until I got pulled off by my belt and dragged onto the dance floor by my cohorts.

***

Many cocktails and shots later Nikki had coaxed me home.
“Why did we leave everyone?” I whined, collapsing onto the couch.

“Cos I wanted you to myself,” he replied laying on top of me.

“Ohhh,” I sighed and struggled for something to call him, which wasn’t insulting, “Psshhhh. What am I gonna do with you?” I asked rhetorically and wrapped my legs around him.

A crash came from a direction…which direction I didn’t know. Nikki jumped off me, grabbed his guitar and looked around, dazed and confused.
I picked up a bottle of Jack and we both stalked around until we found the kitchen window open and Envy stuck under it. The sash mechanism had slipped and she was sandwiched between the frame and the pane.

“Hahahaaa you dick,” I laughed at her and leaned on Nikki’s shoulder.

“Sorry, I was tryin’ not to disturb you guys,” she giggled into the sink…then threw up into it.

“Dude that’s naaaaasty,” Nikki laughed, resting his bass down on the floor and leaning on its head.

“Urgh…I think everyone left me,” Envy complained, retching and trying to turn on the taps.

“Do you want us to leave you too?” I asked.

“Unstick me first?” she asked.

“Pull the window back up,” I told Nikki.
He nodded and did as I asked so I could push Envy back out.

“Thanks guys,” she muttered after landing on her ass on the patio.

“Don’t mention it,” I closed the window and locked it.

“Shouldn’t we like…let her in?” Nikki asked.

“I thought you wanted me to yourself,” I left the room and went to put a record on. I’ve no idea what I ended up putting on but whatever it was we ended up playing his bass and Eva’s guitar to it and drinking ‘til we passed out.

***

My head hurt as per fucking usual and I opened my eyes only to be disappointed that Nikki wasn’t anywhere in sight. My attempts to recall the previous evening left me with more disappointment as the memory of Nikki…I think it’d be called becoming my boyfriend, was quite vivid. I call it disappointment because it means that I gave myself up. I’d clued him in to what he meant to me, I’d let him become important, I’d admitted it not only to myself but to him and of course everyone else now knew. And what should happen but straight away, after I surrendered, he fucked off already. I was so unfathomably taken by him and it pissed me off. Why should emotion be able to take over a person and eat self-control away? How could I possibly let this happen?
It's not like I was some bimbo he'd only just met. I wasn't some utterly naive whore who didn't know him at all.
I’d become so furious with myself that the pain in my head no longer mattered. It wasn’t even that I was pissed off at Nikki; I was pissed off with my hormones. A handy bottle, devoid of its contents was to hand luckily for me, in my rage I threw it at the door…which opened as the glass shattered and sprayed across that side of the room.

“Liv?” Nikki leaned around the door, his hair fell away from his eyes and I could see concern in them.

“Uh…” I was slightly stunned, “what?”

Yeah, act casual cause throwing glass bottles around it a totally regular thing to do.

“Is everything ok?” he asked, stepping inside the room and slowly coming towards me.

“Has everything ever been ok as long as you’ve known me?” I muttered.
I didn’t want an answer to that. I wanted life to be right. Right meant the unachievable to me. Nobody gets a fairytale unless they’re high on smack and never come down.

“What’s up?” he sighed and sat down, pulling me into his arms.

I was a huge problem. I couldn’t connect with people easily and I definitely couldn’t trust anyone without good reason. I was like a fortress and the trouble with them is there can be so much barricading the gates that it can take too long for some people waiting at them and by the time the gate is ready to open, the person waiting for it came down with syphilis or a severe migraine and had to leave.

“I told you I’m insane, right?” I sighed, this was going to be no picnic and I hadn’t even decided what to tell him.

“Yeah, I think you mentioned that. All geniuses are insane to one degree or another though,” he smiled at me.

“Dunno what genius has to do with anything right now. Did I ever tell you that I hate you?”

Bear with me now.

“What?” he exhaled sharply as if a silent laugh.

“I hate you because of how you make me feel. I didn’t want anyone to make me feel like this ever again. So that’s why I hate you in a way,” I explained.

If I hadn’t surrendered already then that was definitely surrendering.

“I make you feel sick?” he grinned widely at me.

I smiled back, “I feel sick with myself. I’m not inflating your fat head any more than I need to,” I told him and leaned my head on his shoulder.

“That’s just fine, I’ll have to keep working on making you feel sick.”

“Just…keep gettin’ fucked up with me with leave that to make me feel sick.” I pulled the bed cover over our heads.

I was by no means gonna be compatible with a loving, doting and gentle human being with no stick up his ass. A nice guy was never gonna catch my attention. Besides, once you've fucked someone as breath taking as Sixx, nobody else would ever do.
Nikki was never going to be anyone's version of a good boyfriend in any sense. He was rude, arrogant, ignorant and irritating at the best of times. But because he was the most beautiful person in the world and could be the complete opposite of the usual asshole he so enjoyed portraying when he saw fit, that was excuse enough for a shallow woman like myself to fall completely, utterly and insanely...in love?