The Remains Of My Wasted Youth.

It was about a week later and me and Zack were laying on the guest bed at Rian's - Zack had pretty muched moved in with the Dawsons', at least for the time being. Rian hadn't been too comfortable around me at first - I still didn't understand the reluctance to start a friendship, but I could deal with it. For the most part, he left us alone. And Rian's parents were super sweet.

We were watching movies but I was getting pretty restless. I was flouncing around on the bed more than anything.

Zack poked me. "Are you going to settle down or what?"

I eyed him impishly, and then without warnining I jumped on top of him. I pinned him down to the bed and started tickling him. Jack had let it slip that Zack was really ticklish but I hadn't had the chance to test it out until then. Sure enough, within minutes, Zack was squealing.

"Alleeeeeex. Allllleeeex, stop. Please, Lex, I'm gonna piss my pants." The words were punctuated with bouts of laughter and it was infectious. Soon enough, we were both rolling around laughing until - BAM.

I found myself on the floor. I glared up at Zack. "You pushed me."

"Did not."

"Did too."

I pouted and held out a hand. "Well, help me up at least - it's your fault I fell."

"You started it!"

"Zachary Merrick, help me, or I swear I'll never kiss you again." I held out my hand again and this time Zack grasped it and suddenly found himself on top of me. I giggled, unable to control it. He'd fallen for the oldest trick in the book.

But I hadn't planned things properly - he was laying on top of me, his body pressing intimately into mine. Despite my best intentions and control, I knew I was going to end up getting turned on. Curse Zack Merrick and his killer body. I wiggled, trying to get away - big mistake. Instead, I ended up even more intimately wedged under him. I could feel my face going red.

"Problem, Lex?" Zack was smirking and I hated him because he seemed so totally unaffected by being pressed up against me.

"No," I muttered, my teeth clenced. "Why would you think that?"

Zack moved against me in response. I felt myself harden even more. "You seem pretty, er, happy, Alex."

"Shut up," I hissed, for some reason getting annoyed. "Just get off me, will you?"

Zack must have sensed my attitude change because he got off me right off. I got to my knees and brushed the dust off my clothes. I grabbed my sweater from the bed.

"I think I'm gonna go," I replied, and turned for the door. I hadn't made it more than just a few steps when I felt Zack's arm on my shoulder. I tried to shove it off, but he held me firmly until I turned around. By then, I was getting really upset and there were tears shining in my eyes.

"Alex, seriously, what's wrong?" Zack's voice was filled with concern and that made the tears fall.

"Nothing," I muttered. "I'm just being a baby."

"You're not a baby, Lex. Something's wrong. Tell me?" Maybe it was the fact that it was a request, not an order, but something in me broke and I spilled out what I was thinking without even really thinking about what I was doing.

"I hate not having any experience, okay? I hate that I'm scared to do anything more than fool around. I want to do more so bad but I just get so scared and then I feel like I'm a cocktease because we get all turned on and we can never do anything. And then I feel like my lack of experience turns you off. You just never seem to get as into it as I do. You can tell me if I suck, you know. I probably do. You probably don't even want to make out with me because I'm horrible and have horrible self-control on top of that. I -"

I was cut off by Zack shoving me backwards onto the bed. He crawled on top of me, his lips attacking mine. His tongue teased my lips until I parted them with a little sigh. His teeth grazed roughly at my lips and tongue and it was a thrilling turn on. My hands moved up to grasp the back of his head, drawing him even closer to me. My legs wrapped around his hips and I could feel the press of his erection against my thigh.

Zack's lips dropped and started sucking on my neck. I writhed under him, doubly so when his lips and teeth found my sweet spot. I moaned, softly at first, and then louder. My hands moved from his hair to his ass and pressed him even more tightly against him.

I reached my hands under Zack's shirt, my nails biting into the firm, smooth skin under the flimsy material. It wasn't long before the shirt was history. My lips dropped to rain fiery kisses on his hot skin. Zack moaned, and the sound spurred me on. My fingers dipped into the waistband of his shorts. Inch by inch, I pulled them down. We hadn't tried anything like this since that one time in the dark.

Once again, it was me initiating the contact - but this time, I wanted it. I knew exactly what I was doing and how I wanted it. I flipped him onto his back and crawled up him. I ran my fingers along his dick, light as a feather at first, and then harder, and then feather light and hard. The contrast between the two touches had him thrusting into my hands within seconds. I dip my head, and gently flick my tongue over his glistening head. He moaned again, louder than the first time. Emboldened, I took all of him into my mouth in one shot.

I took his full length into my mouth a few times, and then concentrated on sucking the head and caressing the balls. I took one ball at a time into my mouth, and then went back to working the rest of him. I could feel him tensing more and more, and I encouraged him to move. He seemed hesistant at first but it wasn't long before he had his hands in my hair, thrusting fully into my mouth. He moaned my name over and over again, and with a final moan, came in my mouth.

I moved off of him, falling onto the bed. I felt Zack's hands working at my belt buckle. "My turn," he murmured. I made to protest, but didn't get a chance because Zack's mouth had already found my dick and I forgot the English language.

He licked me up and down a few times, his hands squeezing gently. I moaned, wanting him to go faster, but he just smirked and took his time, licking me and sucking the top of my dick for a few seconds at a time. He then proceeded to kiss the insides of my thighs, and then along the top of my stomach and all the way down until his lips grazed my swollen shaft again. This time, he took me into his mouth all the way and started deepthroating me. I moaned, thrusting into his mouth as he worked me with everything he had. His nails grazed my ass and his fingers hovered over my asshole, toying but never coming too close. When I gave a moan of encouragement, he slipped just one finger in, streching me in the most delicious way possible. And it was all I needed to explode into his mouth.

Zack crawled up to me, his mouth finding mine, both of our lips sticky with cum. The kissing rapidly grew more heated, again, with our naked bodies pressing up against the other's. Zack pulled away first.

"Don't ever think I don't want you, Alex," he said, his expression serious. "I want you so bad it hurts. But I hold back, because I don't want to scare you. And never think you're no good - you're perfect."

"I'm a mess, Zack." I couldn't help but feeling insecure. I was terrified to lose the only person who'd ever loved me by choice, not because they were family and had to.

"You leave me a mess, baby, so we're perfect together. I wouldn't change you."

I sighed, admitting defeat. "How did I get so lucky?"

"I don't know, you just did," he said, and stuck his tongue out at me. "Now ... I'm guessing we should probably change the sheets."