The Remains Of My Wasted Youth.

Zack and I woke up almost at the same time the next morning. By the time we'd gotten in from outside, my parents had already been asleep and after everything that had gone on, I hadn't had the heart to wake them. Instead, we'd eaten and gone right to sleep. It was now 8am, and I could hear my parents moving around downstairs.

"Good morning," I whispered to Zack, and he opened his eyes, smiling at me.

"I could get used to this," he said softly. "Good morning, gorgeous."

"My parents are awake," I said softly. "I'm going to go downstairs and talk to them before you come downstairs, okay?"

Zack nodded his consent, and snuggled into the pillows. "Mkay. I'm gonna sleep for 5 more minutes."

Within a second he was asleep, and I stared at him for a few minutes. Poor baby, he was so worn out. These last few days had been so hard on everyone, but especially Zack. I couldn't believe that his parents had made him feel worthless and shitty. I smoothed out a piece of hair across his forehead and kissed him softly on the cheek before walking downstairs.

"Good morning, Alex," my mom said before I could say anything. "Does Zack eat pancakes?"

"Uhhh...." I stammered. "I think so. He's still sleeping."

"We saw his truck pull in last night," my dad added. "Did his parents kick him out?"

I sighed. "Sort of. It's more like he walked out because of what they said to him. They blame him for everything. They didn't even blame me, but they blamed him. Zack needs somewhere to stay. Can ... can he stay here?"

"Of course," my mom said. "We talked about it last night, actually. We feel like we owe him, anyway. We never should have ran away like that and left him to deal with his parents on his own. We knew what they were like ... we knew that they'd never accept his brother's death and we knew that they'd never give him the love that he deserved. I feel sorry for him. And kind of guilty. He needed you."

"He still needs me" I said. "He's getting better, but it's in small steps."

"He's not quite 18, is he?" my dad asked.

"His birthday is in a few weeks," I said. "Is that going to cause any problems?"

"No, I was just wondering."

Just then, Zack wandered down the stairs, and stared as us hesitantly.

My mom got to her feet and held out her arms. Zack went into them willingly, and he stayed in her arms for the longest time. I teared up, watching my mom and my boyfriend accepting each other.

"Welcome home," she said simply. "It's been a long time coming, but it's about time we get to welcome you home."

Tears streamed down Zack's face. "I've always felt like I've belonged here with you," he said softly. "I was so lost when you guys left. I think that hurt me more than losing my brother," he admitted softly.

"It hurt us, too," my mom said. "I don't mean any disrespect, but I'd always wished that you and Alex would have ended up together instead of Alex and Kevin. Kevin was great, but he wasn't you."

Zack smiled at my mom. "Well, we're together now. Better late than never, right?"

The four of us sat down and within minutes my mom had pancakes on the table. We all ate in silence, with just the sounds of four content people eating good food. Zack looked a lot better with something in his stomach, and I could tell that he was still a bit down, despite being welcomed so warmly from my parents.

"Wanna go hang out with Jack, Rian, and Matt?" I asked when we finished eating. "They're supposed to be hanging out and playing video games and stuff."

Zack nodded. "Sure." And then he laughed.

"What's so funny?"

"It's just funny how you fit back into our group like nothing had ever happened, you know? We always had the same friends and we still do. We're attracted to the same sort of people. Weird, loud, jokesters with good taste in music and bad taste in hairstyles."

We both laughed, picturing Jack's weird skunk hair and Rian's shaggy do. "Let's go!"

We called out goodbyes to my mom and jumped into Zack's truck. Within minutes, we'd pulled into Rian's yard.

We didn't even bother ringing the doorbell, we just walked in, calling out greetings to the Dawsons and heading into the basement where we found our friends chilling, with guitars and beer and nachos.

Jack instantly jumped up and hugged both of us, almost knocking us down.

"Where have you fuckers been hiding? Do you know what we've been up to over the last few days? Writing chords and stuff, motherfuckers. Now, Alex, we need you to write some beautiful lyrics, because guess what?"

"What?"

"We might have a shot to play a bunch of gigs around the States with a couple of other local bands if we get our shit together! We can do this!"

Jack was so excited and it was contagious. I sat down beside him, and took the guitar from him. I'd been writing a few songs lately, with chords and lyrics and everything, and I was excited to play stuff for them. But first ...

"Guys, I think you should know what's been going on the last few days. I remember everything that happened two years ago with Zack and his brother and everything. Everything is out in the open with the two families, and we don't want to discuss that story anymore, ever. But I will tell you that Zack's living with me now."

They seemed all but surprised.

Rian spoke first. "I just figured it was a matter of time, honestly. I know Zack, and I knew he wouldn't last much longer. I gave you until your birthday, actually, buddy."

"Speaking of your birthday," Jack said excitedly. "We have a chance to play a gig the night of your birthday, and we figured that we'd invite a bunch of people and make a night of it. How does that sound?"

Zack finally found his voice. "Overwhelming. But ... amazing!"

We all exchanged high fives and I smiled, suddenly nervous and giddy.

"Now can I play something that I wrote? It's not finished but it has promise." My palms were sweaty as they nodded and I started to play.

Think about it 'till anticipation makes you shake
And we both lose control.
Put the pedal to the floor,
Lay the seat back, lock the doors,
We're gonna make this worth our while.
It's getting harder to breathe...

"Jealous hearts will leave us all in ruins,"
that's what we'll say.
as we hide out from our friends, hear the message once again,
"Let's get this right."

Your lips are a hot flame, baby
and our chemistry is kerosene...
Take it off, take it all off,
maybe we can get down and burn up in the heat...

When I stopped singing and playing, all eyes were on me. I looked at them all slowly, meeting each one of their eyes, and every face held anticipation, awe, eagerness, and full blown wonder.

Jack finally spoke first, jumping to his feet and dancing around.

"WE'RE GOING TO BE FUCKING ROCKSTARS!"

We all burst out laughing as he fell to the ground, laying at our feet with a huge dopey smile on his face that we all shared.

I'd never wanted to be a rockstar. But I'd never counted on falling in love at eighteen, or being blessed with such amazing friends. It was just one of those twists of fate. I was learning to roll with it.

I'd never wanted to be a rockstar, but .... it looks like I had a shot at it anyway. And for some reason, it felt right. This all felt right.

Eighteen years old, and I finally knew what true happiness was.

And looking at the rest of my friends, who were now attacking Jack on the floor, I knew that they could all say the same. Except Zack, and that saddened me. He still had a little ways to go, but he was getting closer.

With our help, I knew he'd make it.