The Ugly Truth

I stared at my reflection and wanted to yell. The wetsuit looked absolutely ridiculous. Like all wetsuits, it was tight all over, which isn’t exactly my idea of looking good. I put on a floral maxi skirt and a tank and cardigan on top to try to hide it a bit, at least while I walked down the street.

I was so hot in all that clothes as I drove to Riley’s house. I tried scheming a plan so that I could be the least embarrassed possible. Maybe I could distract people from it by doing something else, but that something else would be equally embarrassing. Everyone would think I was a freak anyways. Maybe I could say I had a rash or a skin condition and I couldn’t expose it to the sun. Or I could tell them I couldn’t find my bikini, but that excuse even sounded lame to me.

As his driveway appeared before me, my heart began beating faster. Why did I have to do this?! Why couldn’t I have a normal little summer, like every other year? I kept telling myself to breathe deeply and remember it wasn’t the end of the world. I had probably made worse fashion mistakes when I was in sixth or seventh grade. It was no big deal. No big deal at all.

The doorbell rang loudly and I held my breath as I heard footsteps approaching.

“Hey,” Riley said as he thrust the door open.

“Hi,” I replied, handing him a package with shiny blue wrapping paper.

“Thanks, Linds. You shouldn’t have.”

“Well, I did,” I smiled, “So open it up and tell me if you like it. I have the receipt if you want to change it or something.”

“I think I should see it first before deciding anything,” Riley replied, grinning.

I watched as he tore at the wrapping paper. I was so eager to see his face when he saw what it was. All the years I had known him, he had been infatuated with Coldplay, and I had spent an important amount of my savings to buy him a pair of tickets, but it was definitely worth it.

His eyes widened as he opened the box and found the tickets inside.

“Pretty cool, huh?” I asked, “Now you can finally go to one of their concerts!”

“But... I hadn’t even heard they were coming.”

Riley was so amazed my heart could burst with joy. The look on his face was so adorable.
“Well, if you had done a little research you would know,” I laughed.

Before I even knew what was happening, Riley had pulled me into his arms. My heart skip a beat as he pulled my body closer.

“Thank you so much,” he whispered into my hair.

“You’re welcome,” I replied, a big, goofy smile on my face.

“And you better go with me or…”

“Or?” I teased.

“Or we’ll have another sand fight.”

“Bring it on.”

We both laughed, and I realized we were still hugging, so I pulled away. It would be awkward to stay in that position any longer.

“You really don’t have to take me if you don’t want to. Don’t take me just because I gave them to you, really.”

“I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that or I might just have to have that sand war with you for thinking I wouldn’t want to take you,” Riley laughed, “Let’s go join everyone else?”

I followed him through his house, decorated with some pieces I recognized from his other house years ago, and ended up on a wooden deck, with about ten people gathered around or in a kidney shaped pool and a few guys manning the grill.

“To those of you who don’t know her, this is Lindsay,” he said loudly.

Everyone mumbled hi or waved, which was a little awkward, but they all seemed like nice enough people. I spotted a few familiar faces as I looked around.

“Do you want something to drink?” Riley asked me.

“Sure.”

He went off to get it, so I neared an empty lounge chair near where all the girls were gathering.

“Hey, Lindsay, how’s it going?” a girl named Kelsey asked, smiling.

Kelsey and I had been pretty close classmates during our junior year, and although we hadn’t talked much as seniors, we really clicked and liked one another.

“I’m great. You?”

“Oh, you know me, I’m always peachy, darling,” she replied in a phony accent.

All the girls laughed, but we did more than anyone because it was sort of an inside joke. We used to imitate our math teacher, who literally talked like that, all the time. Kelsey hadn’t changed a bit, and I was so glad.

I had always felt a special bond towards her because neither of us was what you could call goddess-like or model-like, but we both had lots of personality. And that was what made her beautiful. By no means was she ugly. Her dark blond hair and hazel eyes were much prettier than mine, and her weight had always been average, but the sparkle in her eyes and her quirky smile made her even more attractive, in my eyes. And, like me, she didn’t have a lot going in the boyfriend department.

We chatted a little about everything, making up for lost time.

And that was when I saw her. She had been inside while I had arrived, so I hadn’t seen her. But there she was, in her polka dotted string bikini, her shiny, blond hair cascading on her shoulders. She was so skinny, so pretty.

She approached us, and I realized I had sat down where she had been. She scrunched up her face a little, but grabbed another and dragged it closer, which was a pretty nice gesture.

“Britney, this is Lindsay. Lindsay, this is Britney,” one of the girls introduced us.

We exchanged hellos and I returned to my chat with Kelsey, but I couldn’t take my mind off of Britney. For some reason, I figured she would have one of those typical queen bee names. Her nails were a deep red and she had the cutest sandals, each with a little bow. Everything she had seemed glamorous and stunning.

My gaze drifted over to where Riley was hanging with his friends. They were all gathered around the grill while he cooked the hamburgers. I had never known he could cook. As I continued staring, he looked my way and smiled. I smiled back, embarrassed and turned back to the girls so I wouldn’t seem like a stalker.

“Take off your clothes and let’s get in the pool,” Kelsey told me, removing the sarong she had on over her bikini.

The time had come. I had devised an excuse which was lame, but better than nothing. As I slowly started removing my clothes, and as the wetsuit started peeking through, I felt a lot of eyes on me. Once it was completely out in the open, I finally dared to look over at everyone’s faces. All the other girls were pretending to mind their own business, but I knew they were wondering what in the world was running through my mind.

“I was surfing before and I didn’t have time to change into my bikini,” I explained.

“Oh, but is the water that cold at this time of year?” a girl asked me, clearly not in an offending way.

“Yeah… I get sick really easily and the wind and all can make me ill.”

It was a cheesy excuse and I knew it. Everyone just nodded and continued getting ready to go in the pool. And that was when it dawned on me. Caroline hadn’t said how long I had to have it on. She had just said it had to show, and everyone had seen it. I couldn’t believe my luck.

“Do any of you have an extra bikini or something by chance?” I asked, knowing they wouldn’t think I was a weirdo now that I had explained the situation and asked for a bikini.

All of the girls shook their heads.

“Maybe Riley has one in his house. He’s told me his cousin comes visit in the summer sometimes and stays in the guest room. Maybe she has one in there,” Britney said.

“Oh,” was all I replied.

“I’ll go tell him,” Britney offered, jumping up and heading to the barbecue.

I glanced at her as she talked to Riley. It was obvious they were going out, wasn’t it? I realized embarrassment wasn’t the worst feeling you could feel. Jealously and sadness were definitely on the top of the list too.

They walked over to where I was.

“Come, I’ll show you were her stuff is and we can look through it and see if there’s a bikini,” Riley said, shielding his eyes from the sun with his hand and smiling.

“Are you sure she won’t mind?”

“Yeah. This is like her second choice clothes. Her favorites are at her house.”

“Alright, thanks.”

“That’s nice of you,” Britney said, hugging him and then going back to her chair.
I could almost feel myself turning green from envy. Jealousy isn’t good, I should be happy for him. I kept repeating that over and over in my head as we walked into the house.

“I didn’t know you surfed.”

“Oh well, I don’t. I was getting some lessons from a friend.”

“That guy you were with at the fair?”

Well, her excuse had formed itself nicely, with only her minimal participation.

“Um, yeah.”

There was an awkward silence as an image of John kissing me flashed through my mind. I wondered if Riley was also thinking about that.

“Is he your boyfriend?”

Wow. He had popped the question so casually. Almost like we were talking about the weather and not my messy love life.

“No.”

“Oh.”

I don’t know if I imagined it, but I saw a small smile forming on his lips.

“Is Britney your girlfriend?”

“What?” he asked, sharply, stopping in his tracks and facing me, almost violently.

“Well, you asked if John was my boyfriend so now I’m asking if Britney is your girlfriend. You two seem awfully close.”

I couldn’t believe those words had escaped my mouth. I felt like clapping for myself. It was hard to believe I had it so calmly and reasonably, as if I didn’t like him at all.

“Yeah, we’re close, but it’s because, well, she’s like family.”

“Like family?”

“We’re not technically family, but our fathers are close friends and we practically grew up together. So, no. It would be like dating a cousin or something.”

“How come you never told me about her before?”

Here was this girl who had always been in his life and I had never heard of her. If they were like family, why hadn’t he told me about her?

“I didn’t think she needed any mentioning.”

“Oh.”

I had always told him everything. Somehow, the news that Britney wasn’t his girlfriend didn’t make me as happy as I thought it would. Clearly he had never really considered me a good friend, because you don’t just forget to tell close friends about things like that. Alright, maybe it had never crossed his mind, but still. I felt I should have known about her, because we were supposed to be best friends.

“Here’s her room,” Riley said, showing me into an empty bedroom, with only a bed and a closet inside.

“Let’s see if she has one in here,” he continued, opening the closet door.

I didn’t say anything or even nod at him because I was mad. I should have been ecstatic that Britney and Riley weren’t an item, but I was too caught up in my anger. And I had a right to be.

There was a black bag filled with clothes, so Riley pulled it out and we sat on the carpet and rummaged through it. We pulled out shirts and shorts without saying a thing.

“I think I found one,” Riley said, pulling one out from the bottom of the bag and handing the two pieces to me.

It was a common, triangle top bikini with a vintage map print on it. It was cute, except I wasn’t too fond of the bottom part, which was a little smaller than I would have preferred.

“Thanks,” I said, putting everything I had taken out of the bag back into it.

“No problem.”

“Well, I guess I’ll go change,” I said, heading towards the door, but turning back when I realized I didn’t know where the bathroom was. “Um, where’s the bathroom?”

“If you wait a second while I put this back, I’ll show you,” Riley replied, motioning towards the bag.

I didn’t want him to come along. I just wanted to get out of that ridiculous wetsuit and to be as far away from him as possible. But as he smiled at me before heaving the bag back into the closet, I couldn’t help but feel I was mad for something stupid. Fine, he had a friend I didn’t know about. At least he didn’t have a girlfriend he had hidden from me.

“If I tell you something will you not freak out?” Riley asked, heading towards me.

Something like he really did have a secret girlfriend? Or that he had loved me for as long as I had loved him?

“Okay…” I said, breathing in deeply.

He stepped towards me and reached a hand up to my hair. He was so close, I could feel his breath on my face.

“Don’t move,” he said, and flicked my hair.

He stepped back and smiled at me.

“You had a spider on your hair.”

“WHAT?! WHERE IS IT?!” I shrieked.

“I knew you’d freak. Good thing I didn‘t tell you a few seconds earlier or, who knows, it might have sucked your blood or something while you went crazy,” he grinned.

“Yeah, right.”

“You never know what kind of dangerous household spiders there are out there.”

“You’re so lame,” I laughed.

“But you love it,” he teased.

And how.