I Don't Think I'd Be Standing Here If I Never Found You
Out Of The Box
Guess what? TANNER ASKED KY TO MARRY HIM! Everyone knew it was coming but….it’s still super exciting! I’m so happy for her because I know how happy she is and that’s the best thing in the world and all that really matters is to be happy.
Today is my chance though! I met with the photographer and she said that she was going to hire me on for a photoshoot she was doing for Ave Styles. They had three models there and a giant rack of Ave brand clothes so I picked out the outfits and then I did the girls makeup and their hair.
I was really happy with the finished product. The models looked indie and hipster but in a classy way. I thought it was pretty darn cute and it matched the setting and the style of the company overall I think.
“Jenny, they’re ready,” I said while walking outside with the models.
Jenny the photographer looked up from her camera and saw the models. She stared at them for a while and looked at every inch of them, then her eyes flickered to me.
“What are you thinking?” She questioned with her eyes wide open.
“What do you mean?” I stuttered.
“This is awful! It’s looks like the 1950’s ate some indian patterns and then threw it up all over the models!” Jenny told me. “And what’s with the hair? It needs to be straightened, not all wavy and braided and crazy. Do you seriously like the way they look?”
I bit my lower lip and eventually croaked out, “Yeah, I thought they looked good.”
“I think it’s pretty obvious that we have extremely different styles so I better get a different stylist,” Jenny stated. “Sorry but it’s just not going to work out.”
“Oh, okay,” I sighed while sending her a weak smile. “Well thanks for the opportunity.”
She just nodded and so I left. I plunked down in my car and felt completely defeated. I felt like someone just punched me in the stomach and left me lying on the ground. Harry told me that I’d be good at anything I did…. I think he was wrong.
I felt dejected, hurt, and all those feelings of being an outcast came back. I don’t know if I ever will find what I’m good at because obviously what I thought I might be god at, I failed at.
“What’s wrong honey?” My mom cooed when I walked into their house.
“The photographer hated my style and fired me,” I sighed while plopping down on the couch.
“Just because you have out of the box style doesn’t mean it’s bad, it’s just not most people’s cup of tea,” My dad chimed in.
“Dad, that just made me feel worse, not better,” I told him.
“I’m sorry,” He apologized. “You have your own style and it’s yours, so of course not everyone in the world is going to like it.”
“How am I supposed to do stuff with clothes if no one likes it though?” I asked.
“Maybe, the fashion industry isn’t ready for you yet sweetie,” My mom tried to tell me. “Just because your style works for you doesn’t mean it will for everyone and that’s okay, that’s why everyone has their own style.”
“I just don’t know what to do anymore. I’m not good at anything,” I sighed more to myself than anyone.
“Maybe you need a break,” Dad suggested.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“Just take some time to hang out and really decide what direction is you,” He smiled.
“Yeah, maybe,” I mumbled.
I think my quarter life crisis reached an all time low today. I really don’t know if I’ll ever find anything I can do well and love. Maybe I will always just be an outcast. Maybe being lame is my direction in life!
Today is my chance though! I met with the photographer and she said that she was going to hire me on for a photoshoot she was doing for Ave Styles. They had three models there and a giant rack of Ave brand clothes so I picked out the outfits and then I did the girls makeup and their hair.
I was really happy with the finished product. The models looked indie and hipster but in a classy way. I thought it was pretty darn cute and it matched the setting and the style of the company overall I think.
“Jenny, they’re ready,” I said while walking outside with the models.
Jenny the photographer looked up from her camera and saw the models. She stared at them for a while and looked at every inch of them, then her eyes flickered to me.
“What are you thinking?” She questioned with her eyes wide open.
“What do you mean?” I stuttered.
“This is awful! It’s looks like the 1950’s ate some indian patterns and then threw it up all over the models!” Jenny told me. “And what’s with the hair? It needs to be straightened, not all wavy and braided and crazy. Do you seriously like the way they look?”
I bit my lower lip and eventually croaked out, “Yeah, I thought they looked good.”
“I think it’s pretty obvious that we have extremely different styles so I better get a different stylist,” Jenny stated. “Sorry but it’s just not going to work out.”
“Oh, okay,” I sighed while sending her a weak smile. “Well thanks for the opportunity.”
She just nodded and so I left. I plunked down in my car and felt completely defeated. I felt like someone just punched me in the stomach and left me lying on the ground. Harry told me that I’d be good at anything I did…. I think he was wrong.
I felt dejected, hurt, and all those feelings of being an outcast came back. I don’t know if I ever will find what I’m good at because obviously what I thought I might be god at, I failed at.
“What’s wrong honey?” My mom cooed when I walked into their house.
“The photographer hated my style and fired me,” I sighed while plopping down on the couch.
“Just because you have out of the box style doesn’t mean it’s bad, it’s just not most people’s cup of tea,” My dad chimed in.
“Dad, that just made me feel worse, not better,” I told him.
“I’m sorry,” He apologized. “You have your own style and it’s yours, so of course not everyone in the world is going to like it.”
“How am I supposed to do stuff with clothes if no one likes it though?” I asked.
“Maybe, the fashion industry isn’t ready for you yet sweetie,” My mom tried to tell me. “Just because your style works for you doesn’t mean it will for everyone and that’s okay, that’s why everyone has their own style.”
“I just don’t know what to do anymore. I’m not good at anything,” I sighed more to myself than anyone.
“Maybe you need a break,” Dad suggested.
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“Just take some time to hang out and really decide what direction is you,” He smiled.
“Yeah, maybe,” I mumbled.
I think my quarter life crisis reached an all time low today. I really don’t know if I’ll ever find anything I can do well and love. Maybe I will always just be an outcast. Maybe being lame is my direction in life!
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