Status: Complete
Starbucks and Christmas Cookies
All I want for Christmas is you
Frank usually loves this time of year. The ground is covered in a white blanket and there’s laughter and smiles all around. The streets are decorated in colorful lights and busy with cheerful shoppers. It’s supposed to be a joyous magical time of year but Frank can’t find it in him to plaster on a fake grin. It was at this time that his wife left him a year ago, taking his beloved twin daughters with her. Things will never be the same without them.
He is alone in his big house wallowing in sorrow and heartache when the doorbell rings. He has no idea who it could be on Christmas Eve. He guesses it’s probably carolers and they seem persistent. When he opens the door he is ready to tell them to go away but it isn’t singing faces he’s greeted by. It’s a red haired man in a worn out jean jacket, scarf, and boots. He’s smiling and Frank raises an eyebrow at him. “What are you doing here?”
“It’s Christmas Eve! No one should be alone on Christmas Eve,” Gerard replies like it’s obvious.
“What about Lyn-Z and Bandit?”
“You know Lyn-Z and I have been separated for a long time now.”
“I thought she was coming to visit.”
“Her mom got sick so she cancelled.”
“Well, you could visit with Mikey and Alicia or your parents,” Frank suggests.
“Are you trying to get rid of me? It’s not going to work Frank. I’m not leaving so you better let me in cause I’d rather not stand out here all night.”
“Sure,” Frank lets Gerard inside and they sit together on the couch. Gerard makes himself comfortable, taking off his jacket and scarf to reveal a black hoodie. It says ho ho ho on it in red and black letters. He sets the stuff he was carrying down on the coffee table.
“I brought Starbucks and Christmas cookies,” he announces. He hands Frank a cup of hot chocolate and he sips it, watching Gerard in the glow of the Christmas tree lights. “How are you doing Frank?”
“Fine,” is the younger man’s automatic response.
“No, I mean how are you really doing? We’re friends. You don’t have to pretend with me.”
Frank sighs. “How do you get through this Gee?”
Gerard looks at him sympathetically. “Believe it or not time continues and each day it gets a little easier. Eventually you move on.”
“I never thought this would happen. Our futures looked so bright. We were happily married with kids who would grow up best friends. We had everything I ever dreamed of and now it’s all gone.”
“We still have each other. We still have the band and the fans.”
“How did this happen? I loved her so much Gerard.”
“Sometimes even if you love someone it’s just not meant to be.”
“It hurts,” Frank’s eyes are damp with tears but he refuses to cry. It’s been a year and men don’t cry.
“I know,” Gerard places a comforting arm around his friend. “One day you’ll find someone else and the pain will fade.”
“I don’t think I’ll ever love someone new. I can’t.”
“It’s going to be alright Frankie.”
“How can you sound so sure?”
“It wasn’t easy at first but it gets better.”
Frank frowns and for a while no one says anything. Gerard picks up the wrapped box on the table and hands it to Frank. “I brought you a gift,” he announces.
“I didn’t even go shopping this year. I’m sorry Gee. I don’t deserve any presents.”
“You do deserve it. You deserve a lot Frank. It’s okay that you didn’t buy me anything. You don’t need to,” Gerard insists.
“Okay,” Frank opens the box and pulls out a thick scrapbook. He begins flipping through it and the tears start to fall. He turns the pages faster and smiles. The book is filled with pictures all the way back from when their band formed to recently. It’s pictures of them together laughing and smiling, hugging and squished together on the tour bus, and even performing together on stage.
“Are you alright? Do you like it?” Gerard is a little worried.
“It’s amazing Gee. I just…I need a minute,” Frank wipes his face and puts the book down.
“Okay.”
He goes to his bathroom, shutting the door and leaving his red haired friend by himself. He leans against his sink and stared at himself in the mirror. He looks so pitiful. He is not the same energetic happy guy in the pictures. So many things have changed. Through all those years, through the good times and the bad, Gerard has never left his side. He is the one person Frank can depend on, the one he can trust, the one he tells his secrets to, the one who made him a scrapbook, the one who showed up on Christmas Eve with Starbucks and Christmas cookies just to keep him company. His broken heart is so filled with love for Gerard that is overwhelming.
He sniffles, dries his eyes, and goes back to his friend. He takes his seat then wraps his arms around Gerard. “I love you man. Thanks for everything.”
“Love you too Frank,” Gerard replies casually.
Frank sits back and takes a deep breath. His stomach is twisting. Suddenly it’s all so clear, realization hitting him like a train on a track. All this time has gone by and it’s only now that he sees it. But what if when he says something about it Gerard gets upset and he ruins friendship with him forever? Then again, what if he never says anything about it? How could he go on pretending? “Do you remember when you told me you were bi-sexual and I kissed you on stage to show you I didn’t mind?”
“Yeah, that was fun,” he nods.
“Later I told you I was bi-sexual too and then we ended up married to girls anyway.”
“Yeah…”
“Did you ever wonder what would happen if we didn’t get married?”
“What are you talking about?” Gerard is confused.
“Our wives left us and I was right when I said I won’t ever love someone new.”
“Don’t say that.”
Frank shakes his head. “I do love someone, someone I’ve known for a long time.”
“Who?” Gerard questions.
“You.”
“What? You love me as a friend, right?”
Frank looks into his eyes. “No, I mean I’m in love with you.”
“You’ve just decided this now?”
“I’ve been in love with you, I just didn’t realize it yet.”
“I’m not sure what to say.”
“Kiss me.”
“Excuse me?” Gerard is obvious surprised.
“Kiss me for real, no stage antics this time,” Frank is very serious.
“Why?”
“Because I’m in love with you and it’s Christmas Eve and there’s mistletoe above us.”
“Okay but…” before Gerard can finish his sentence Frank pounces on him and their lips collide. “Frank…”
“Please tell me you’re in love with me too,” he pleads.
“Okay…I am.”
“You are?”
“I never thought you’d feel the same way and then we both got married and I moved on.”
“They’re gone now. All we have is each other. Please Gee. After all we’ve been through together are you really going to tell me no?”
Gerard shakes his head and pulls Frank into his arms. “Merry Christmas boyfriend.”
He is alone in his big house wallowing in sorrow and heartache when the doorbell rings. He has no idea who it could be on Christmas Eve. He guesses it’s probably carolers and they seem persistent. When he opens the door he is ready to tell them to go away but it isn’t singing faces he’s greeted by. It’s a red haired man in a worn out jean jacket, scarf, and boots. He’s smiling and Frank raises an eyebrow at him. “What are you doing here?”
“It’s Christmas Eve! No one should be alone on Christmas Eve,” Gerard replies like it’s obvious.
“What about Lyn-Z and Bandit?”
“You know Lyn-Z and I have been separated for a long time now.”
“I thought she was coming to visit.”
“Her mom got sick so she cancelled.”
“Well, you could visit with Mikey and Alicia or your parents,” Frank suggests.
“Are you trying to get rid of me? It’s not going to work Frank. I’m not leaving so you better let me in cause I’d rather not stand out here all night.”
“Sure,” Frank lets Gerard inside and they sit together on the couch. Gerard makes himself comfortable, taking off his jacket and scarf to reveal a black hoodie. It says ho ho ho on it in red and black letters. He sets the stuff he was carrying down on the coffee table.
“I brought Starbucks and Christmas cookies,” he announces. He hands Frank a cup of hot chocolate and he sips it, watching Gerard in the glow of the Christmas tree lights. “How are you doing Frank?”
“Fine,” is the younger man’s automatic response.
“No, I mean how are you really doing? We’re friends. You don’t have to pretend with me.”
Frank sighs. “How do you get through this Gee?”
Gerard looks at him sympathetically. “Believe it or not time continues and each day it gets a little easier. Eventually you move on.”
“I never thought this would happen. Our futures looked so bright. We were happily married with kids who would grow up best friends. We had everything I ever dreamed of and now it’s all gone.”
“We still have each other. We still have the band and the fans.”
“How did this happen? I loved her so much Gerard.”
“Sometimes even if you love someone it’s just not meant to be.”
“It hurts,” Frank’s eyes are damp with tears but he refuses to cry. It’s been a year and men don’t cry.
“I know,” Gerard places a comforting arm around his friend. “One day you’ll find someone else and the pain will fade.”
“I don’t think I’ll ever love someone new. I can’t.”
“It’s going to be alright Frankie.”
“How can you sound so sure?”
“It wasn’t easy at first but it gets better.”
Frank frowns and for a while no one says anything. Gerard picks up the wrapped box on the table and hands it to Frank. “I brought you a gift,” he announces.
“I didn’t even go shopping this year. I’m sorry Gee. I don’t deserve any presents.”
“You do deserve it. You deserve a lot Frank. It’s okay that you didn’t buy me anything. You don’t need to,” Gerard insists.
“Okay,” Frank opens the box and pulls out a thick scrapbook. He begins flipping through it and the tears start to fall. He turns the pages faster and smiles. The book is filled with pictures all the way back from when their band formed to recently. It’s pictures of them together laughing and smiling, hugging and squished together on the tour bus, and even performing together on stage.
“Are you alright? Do you like it?” Gerard is a little worried.
“It’s amazing Gee. I just…I need a minute,” Frank wipes his face and puts the book down.
“Okay.”
He goes to his bathroom, shutting the door and leaving his red haired friend by himself. He leans against his sink and stared at himself in the mirror. He looks so pitiful. He is not the same energetic happy guy in the pictures. So many things have changed. Through all those years, through the good times and the bad, Gerard has never left his side. He is the one person Frank can depend on, the one he can trust, the one he tells his secrets to, the one who made him a scrapbook, the one who showed up on Christmas Eve with Starbucks and Christmas cookies just to keep him company. His broken heart is so filled with love for Gerard that is overwhelming.
He sniffles, dries his eyes, and goes back to his friend. He takes his seat then wraps his arms around Gerard. “I love you man. Thanks for everything.”
“Love you too Frank,” Gerard replies casually.
Frank sits back and takes a deep breath. His stomach is twisting. Suddenly it’s all so clear, realization hitting him like a train on a track. All this time has gone by and it’s only now that he sees it. But what if when he says something about it Gerard gets upset and he ruins friendship with him forever? Then again, what if he never says anything about it? How could he go on pretending? “Do you remember when you told me you were bi-sexual and I kissed you on stage to show you I didn’t mind?”
“Yeah, that was fun,” he nods.
“Later I told you I was bi-sexual too and then we ended up married to girls anyway.”
“Yeah…”
“Did you ever wonder what would happen if we didn’t get married?”
“What are you talking about?” Gerard is confused.
“Our wives left us and I was right when I said I won’t ever love someone new.”
“Don’t say that.”
Frank shakes his head. “I do love someone, someone I’ve known for a long time.”
“Who?” Gerard questions.
“You.”
“What? You love me as a friend, right?”
Frank looks into his eyes. “No, I mean I’m in love with you.”
“You’ve just decided this now?”
“I’ve been in love with you, I just didn’t realize it yet.”
“I’m not sure what to say.”
“Kiss me.”
“Excuse me?” Gerard is obvious surprised.
“Kiss me for real, no stage antics this time,” Frank is very serious.
“Why?”
“Because I’m in love with you and it’s Christmas Eve and there’s mistletoe above us.”
“Okay but…” before Gerard can finish his sentence Frank pounces on him and their lips collide. “Frank…”
“Please tell me you’re in love with me too,” he pleads.
“Okay…I am.”
“You are?”
“I never thought you’d feel the same way and then we both got married and I moved on.”
“They’re gone now. All we have is each other. Please Gee. After all we’ve been through together are you really going to tell me no?”
Gerard shakes his head and pulls Frank into his arms. “Merry Christmas boyfriend.”