A Little Piece of Heaven

The next few nights when they were supposed to come home I found Matt to be the only one most every time. I didn’t understand why he didn’t just go to the hotel with them, I trust him and it is kind of boy time. But he seemed perfectly content with being here with me. Honestly the only thing he didn’t want to happened was me being placed in their dressing room while they preformed. I was kept at the RV with a couple body guards. One of them refused to even step foot inside, but the other one-Tommy-had set his gun on the table and played games with me all day. It was nice to spent time with someone other then Matt and the guys. Honestly all they do now is obsess over making sure I wasn’t in pain. Sometimes I can get Zachy to play the play station with me, but he’s the only one. Matt lays with me in bed while I read a book, Syn will throw little paper wads at Matt and I when he’s bored, and Johnny will sneak me out of bed to watch the morning anime with me. But that’s about all they do, I was beginning to think this RV was my personal prison.

Tommy smiled at Matt when we seen him entering the RV. “Hey, how was the show?” He stood up and clipped his gun back onto his belt.

“Fine.” Mat slipped off his shoes then walked over to kiss my forehead. “Anything happen today.” I believe he knew I wasn’t going to give him a true answer, simply because I wanted the babying to stop. Because of this he turned to Tommy to get the details of our dull day.

“Well, she got sick this morning but that was about it. I made her take a nap then she said she felt better.” Tommy pulled on his coat and got ready to leave.

“No blood?” Matt looked back at me and showed me his tired brown eye’s and messy hat covered hair.

“Not a drop.” Tommy opened the door and hoped outside, for once Matt’s buff body followed his and shut the door. It was an attempt to cover the conversation they were having, but I could hear.

“How sick?” Matt demanded when the door was closed, a lighter flicking echoed as well. If he was smoking already, it proves that his day has already been stressful. I wish I hadn’t gotten sick this morning.

“Well, she puked a couple of times and was running a tiny fever. She might be coming down with a cold, I just gave her some cold pills and wrapped her in a few blankets. She slept for a few hours and looked better when she got up.” Tommy explained over the beeping of his SUV unlocking. “Maybe you should make her some of that tea, the Theraflu tea I bought for her.”

“Okay, do you think its an infection?” When he asked that I froze in my seat. I really don’t want to have them take me to another wannabe doctor. Would me getting sick really signify an infection?

“Nah, don’t jump to conclusions. I think its just a cold, or at worst the flu. It does get cold at night here, just bump up the heat before you go to bed. Remember if she pukes again she’ll need your help holding herself up. I’ll be back tomorrow morning.”

If was after the sound of Tommy’s SUV pulling away that Matt opened up the door and came inside. He looked worried and tired, not to mention he just leaned against the wall and watched me for a moment. He gears in his head turning, I was the first to open my mouth.

“I feel okay, honest.” I weakly stood up and felt the wounds sting a little. Still, I pushed my limits to walk slowly over to him. I was still a little queasy, and tired but I didn’t feel like I did this morning which is a step.

He caught me in his arms and kissed me gently. “Why don’t you go lay down and I’ll make us dinner. It’ll make me feel better if you sleep it off.” This was one of the times that I actually didn’t want to go to bed, why was he always so concerned about me now? I mean sure, I am a little weak but I can still do some things on my own.

“But-” I tried to make a counter argument, but he gave me one of those looks. One that said he was tired and he had a bad day. That made me feel guilty so I just looked at my feet and stumbled over to our bunk.

In the bunk sat the Gir doll he bought me and just about every pillow I could find. When I was forced to take a nap earlier I had found it hard to sleep without him so I forced Tommy to give me all the pillows so I could make myself a little ‘nest’. Once inside I burrowed under the soft comforter and curled underneath a pile of pillows.

He didn’t say much as I waited for him, only cursing at the box to tea when he dropped it. My brain began wondering what had happened to him, why was he so depressed today? His mood was killing mine and I couldn’t help be think that it was something I did that gave him this feeling.

As soon as the stove flicked on I felt the RV move as he walked to the bunk. My breath caught in my throat in fear of what he was going to say, but he just sat down at the end and chuckled a little bit.

“Why do you have everyone’s pillow?” His smile was heard through out his voice, I think it was nice to hear that. At least something I was doing was giving him amusement.

I shifted a little bit and hugged one of the pillow’s closer to my chest. “I felt lonely so I made Tommy get them all for me before I would take that nap.”

I felt his body squeeze into a little crack beside me where he burrowed under the pillows as well. “Wow, it’s comfy under here.” A slant of light showed me some of his face and it pained me to see him look depressed still. One of my hands came up to touch his soft cheek.

“What’s wrong?” I hummed.

He frowned and then shrugged. “Well, when I use to perform onstage we did this one act that we tried again tonight. Rev use to like it cause he got to run around and be crazy, it just wasn’t the same without him. I didn’t expect it to be, but I just thought I had gotten over his death, but tonight it just hit me hard. I’m sorry for being like this.” My thumb gently stroked his cheek bone a few times until I lowered my hand. There had to be some way to cheer him up. I’ll just tell him the best thing I can, and that’s the truth.

“Don’t be sorry, Matt.” I watched him carefully. “Before Gave took me I had this friend named Lisa, I remember her because we had been so close. Even when I was taken I seen her on the news saying how important I was to her and I thought she was my best friend. When I finally got away from Gave I discovered she had went out to find me. Her thought was that if she ran away she’d find me because I want to Neverland with Peter Pan. She thought if she could get lost she would find me, she did get lost. But she never found me, or anyone else for that matter. She got hypothermia and died. I still feel like it’s my fault sometimes, but I know that she wouldn’t want me to feel bad. It’s okay to think about him Matt, but don’t feel like he’s not there because he is. He lives in your heart and all the good memories of him power that.” I placed my hand over his heart and then smiled up at him. “He wouldn’t want you to be sad that he’s gone, Matt. He lived his life to the fullest and influenced yours as well.”

Matt became quiet now, I was worried I made him feel worse. But after a few seconds he spoke. “Does the pain go away, Evy? Will I always feel like this?”

I frowned. “Sometimes you’ll feel sad, but that normal. You just miss him, but you’ve got to realize that he’s not gone. Not really. Just because you can’t see him doesn’t mean he’s not there.” Matt sighed and moved closer to me and tucked his face against my collar bone, I believe I felt some tears touch my skin but other then that he just ran his fingers over my arms until he whispered something about our dinner and got out of the bunk.

After he was back into the little kitchen I found myself pushing away the pillows and curling up in the corner of the bunk. I was tired of doing the same thing over and over again, when do we get to go home? When do I get to stand on my own? When are we going to be sure that those people aren’t following us anymore?

“Chicken noodle soup.” Matt smiled, reaching in to hand me the bowl. I could see the small red streak lines of tears on his cheeks after he turned on the bunk light on. Then he curled up against the other corner, both of us eating the soup for a moment until broke the silence.

“Can…do you think when we go home you could let me see my mom again?” I hummed, looking up at him with wondering eyes. Sure she wasn’t the best adult I could’ve grown up around, in fact I believe that Gave was more of a parent to me then she was. Sadly my heart still held a spot for her even if I hadn’t seen her as much as I would’ve liked to.

Matt sighed then took another bite of soup. “Oh darling…” He didn’t speak for another moment. “I don’t think that’d be a good idea, she knows you were kidnapped.”

I shifted a little and favored my wounds until I was in a comfortable position. “I can tell her I ran away, she’d expect it from me.”

He smirked then reached over to stroke my hair from my face. “No, I can’t risk her taking you away from me. I’m not trying to be mean to you, Evy, but I cannot have you taken from me.”

I just nodded and waited until we both finished our dinner before crawling over to Matt and resting against his chest. He was right about my mom, he was right about the fact that she’d take me away from him. He wrapped his arms around me and leaned us against the wall, humming quietly like he normally did when we became lost in thought.

“You don’t need her, Evy.” He whispered, running his fingers over my back now. “Gave once told me something, it was before I met you so I haven’t given much thought about it until now. He told me that he had never had the urge to kidnap anyone until he seen you in the super market with her. He said she was yelling at you for something small, and you were crying because you didn’t understand when you did wrong. He said she slapped you and it scared him because he didn’t understand how a mother could do that. So he followed you home and took you when he believed it was the right time. When you didn’t take to him it scared him and he found himself acting just like your mother, but he said that was the only time you felt at ease. He said you seemed uncomfortable when he was nice to you because the wasn’t normal for you.”

I winced against his shirt and remembered the dark times about my mother and Gave. I was confused about where he was going with this, but I felt like the darkness was coming back. I have hidden memories in my head of times like those, I locked them up and never thoughts of then again. I suppressed then in my head and forced myself to only see the good inside of them.

He held me a bit tighter. “You’re shaking, Evy. I’m sorry…I brought up bad memories didn’t I?”

I sighed a bit and then listened to his soft breathing. “They’re still good people, I…tried to remember that, they’re still my family…even Gave.”

He nodded and then kissed the top of my head. “No, they aren’t really your family. We’re your family, and no matter what happens we always will be.”