Make It A Sweet, Sweet Goodbye

It was a cold dark night, the wind staggering away piles of leaves left by fall. There was a clutter of soft rain falling on the roof. The pain someone’s feeling can’t be tamed by the withering weather. How can you move on when you know there’s nothing to look forward to? How can you smile when your only reason to be happy was gone? Knowing he would never come back gives a heavy thud in the clusters of his heart.

Why must life be this way?

You meet people, you fall in love, and you lose.

Almost paradise, he’d taste heaven and now it’s gone, for good. Maybe some people never even had that much. They were the lucky ones, they didn’t know the bitterness it left in your soul when it is gone.

Was it too much to ask for one more day? Just one more day.

It hurts to admit the fact that he’ll never be around, not anymore. He would never hear his laughter or feel the warmth of his hug, never again. The tiny hum of his voice whenever they talked, that sweet voice that can calm him or just make him smile whenever he called out his name.

The feel of his breath as he laid and slept next to him, having his arms around him in a tight grip knowing he won’t let go. How can someone feel so empty? Was it possible he could be filled with emptiness and there’s a void that screams at his face that you will be forever alone.

Jack blinked at the darkness, he felt his heart throbbing from the pain that kicked his heart and shredding it to pieces. He felt that there’s a hollow part in him that he knows will never be filled again. Under blankets and warm sheets he felt cold and rigid.

What would he do now? Now that he’ll be all alone. He can’t help but remember how he felt about that night, they both knew it’s time. He thought it should have been him, but he knows its better this way, he knows he’s much stronger to endure this than him. He can’t even think that he wanted the other to be in his situation, he can’t hurt him that way, though Alex did just exactly that, he can’t blame him, it’s not his fault.

He thought he’d go through all the things they’ve done together, go to the places that held special memories, watch their favorite movies, though it will never be the same. Who would hold him as he cry at sad moments? Who would carry him to bed when he falls asleep? Who would sing him to sleep?

He felt a hand touch him, when he looked up, he saw him. That smile that he longed to see again, those lips he longed to touch again, there he stood beside the bed.

“Jack, you should move on babe.” Alex smiled that light up his face.

“A-Alex…” he choked back his tears, not believing what he’s seeing, it’s like a crooked attempt of fate on humor.

“Jack, I’m sorry if I left you. But I can’t take seeing you like this. I want you to be happy. I want you to find someone else and move on. Jack, please forget about me.”

Jack was stunned. He didn’t understand why would Alex come and just say these stupid things.

“W-what are you saying?!” he manage to shout back behind held back tears.

Alex sat beside him and gave him a small smile, “Jack, you have to let me go…” he said softly.

“Wha.. How..” he trailed off, he thought he’s having a very bad dream and he wanted to wake up, this is too much to bear, seeing the beautiful face of Alex, hearing his voice again, it was unnerving.

Alex leaned closer and dropped a feathery soft kiss on his lips, he barely felt it, and then a cold breeze swept through him.

When he opened his eyes, the vision of Alex was gone.