All I Want Is to Be With You Always
All I Want is to be with You Always
Atti Ryland and Milo Harding were both staring at the sidewalk.
They were walking up Haight Street after school, just as the pair of best friends always did, but lately things had been different. Instead of silly arguments and inside jokes, there was nothing but tenseness and an air of solitude that joined them on this October day. Atti was a forward girl- she couldn’t handle it anymore. She needed to get to the bottom of Milo’s behavior- and she think she knew where to start.
"Do you have feelings for me?" Atti asked straight up, stopping short and dropping her backpack to the ground. It was time she got things figured out before she literally exploded with longing for her best friend. Milo just stared.
"But, but you're going to prom with Jacoby," was all he could squeeze out.
"This isn't about Jacoby right now, Milo. This is about you and me. You know, our life long friendship? Now tell me. Truthfully. Do you have feelings for me?"
He hesitated. "No..."
Atti stared at him strangely. Either the only logical solution for his attitude lately had just been ruled out, or he was denying it. So what the hell was going on? She started to speak, "then what's wrong with you? What happened?"
"Nothing."
"You're lying." He was silent. Atti began to try to fight the tears that were raging to spill over her eyelids. "Why are you doing this?" She whispered to him as he looked at her with hurt and confusion in his eyes. "Why can't you tell me what's going on with you? Its me, Milo. Its Atti. It's the girl that you used to laugh with and talk to on the Internet all night and tell you're deepest secrets too as if you were a girl just like me. And now, out of nowhere, it’s like you don't remember anything about us. I don't understand. Do I look any different? Sound any different? Its still me. Atti Ryland. Black hair, blue eyes, pierced nose, obnoxious laugh? I’m the same girl. Milo, just talk to me." She was to the point of near hysteria. He still did nothing but stare. Milo’s mouth was open but nothing was coming out. He was fighting with himself about it- Atti could see. Was he going to tell her or not? They just stood there for another few minutes in dead silence. All Milo managed to say was:
"I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry too." Atti breathed as she shook her head and started to walk home.
"Wait!" He called after her. She turned to him and again he tried to speak. Atti felt a tear roll down her cheek. Milo ran up to her and grabbed her hand. Once again, no words escaped between his red lips.
“Damn it, Milo!” Atti exclaimed, ripping her hand from his. “Don’t you see what you’re doing to me? Fine. If you’re too afraid to say it, then I will. I don’t want to go to prom with Jacoby. I don’t want to go to prom with anyone but you.”
“Wh-what?” Milo stuttered.
“I like you! Hell, I probably love you. But none of that matters if you can’t say the same to me. Goodbye, Milo.”
She went to storm off again, but Milo stopped her. His floppy brown hair hung around his nervous green eyes like camouflage. Finally, he pushed them away. Pushed all his inhibitions away.
And then he kissed her. Square on the mouth. Finally breaking down the solitude.
“I don’t want it to be like this.” He said after a moment. “Me hiding my feelings for you because I’m afraid of a broken heart and a ruined friendship. I don’t want to be on the fence between what I am so afraid of and what I really want. Because... All I want is to be with you always.”
They were walking up Haight Street after school, just as the pair of best friends always did, but lately things had been different. Instead of silly arguments and inside jokes, there was nothing but tenseness and an air of solitude that joined them on this October day. Atti was a forward girl- she couldn’t handle it anymore. She needed to get to the bottom of Milo’s behavior- and she think she knew where to start.
"Do you have feelings for me?" Atti asked straight up, stopping short and dropping her backpack to the ground. It was time she got things figured out before she literally exploded with longing for her best friend. Milo just stared.
"But, but you're going to prom with Jacoby," was all he could squeeze out.
"This isn't about Jacoby right now, Milo. This is about you and me. You know, our life long friendship? Now tell me. Truthfully. Do you have feelings for me?"
He hesitated. "No..."
Atti stared at him strangely. Either the only logical solution for his attitude lately had just been ruled out, or he was denying it. So what the hell was going on? She started to speak, "then what's wrong with you? What happened?"
"Nothing."
"You're lying." He was silent. Atti began to try to fight the tears that were raging to spill over her eyelids. "Why are you doing this?" She whispered to him as he looked at her with hurt and confusion in his eyes. "Why can't you tell me what's going on with you? Its me, Milo. Its Atti. It's the girl that you used to laugh with and talk to on the Internet all night and tell you're deepest secrets too as if you were a girl just like me. And now, out of nowhere, it’s like you don't remember anything about us. I don't understand. Do I look any different? Sound any different? Its still me. Atti Ryland. Black hair, blue eyes, pierced nose, obnoxious laugh? I’m the same girl. Milo, just talk to me." She was to the point of near hysteria. He still did nothing but stare. Milo’s mouth was open but nothing was coming out. He was fighting with himself about it- Atti could see. Was he going to tell her or not? They just stood there for another few minutes in dead silence. All Milo managed to say was:
"I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry too." Atti breathed as she shook her head and started to walk home.
"Wait!" He called after her. She turned to him and again he tried to speak. Atti felt a tear roll down her cheek. Milo ran up to her and grabbed her hand. Once again, no words escaped between his red lips.
“Damn it, Milo!” Atti exclaimed, ripping her hand from his. “Don’t you see what you’re doing to me? Fine. If you’re too afraid to say it, then I will. I don’t want to go to prom with Jacoby. I don’t want to go to prom with anyone but you.”
“Wh-what?” Milo stuttered.
“I like you! Hell, I probably love you. But none of that matters if you can’t say the same to me. Goodbye, Milo.”
She went to storm off again, but Milo stopped her. His floppy brown hair hung around his nervous green eyes like camouflage. Finally, he pushed them away. Pushed all his inhibitions away.
And then he kissed her. Square on the mouth. Finally breaking down the solitude.
“I don’t want it to be like this.” He said after a moment. “Me hiding my feelings for you because I’m afraid of a broken heart and a ruined friendship. I don’t want to be on the fence between what I am so afraid of and what I really want. Because... All I want is to be with you always.”