The Thrill Is Gone

“So what do you think?” she asked quietly as her brother climbed into the passenger’s seat.

“Hmm, it’s a little cold for my liking, but it’s alright, I guess. Not as good as Azusa, but alright enough,” replied Adrian, knowing very well that his sister wasn’t asking about the weather. “I personally wouldn’t live here but that’s just me.”

“I'm not talking about the damn weather.”

“Really?” asked Adrian, buckling his seatbelt. “Could’ve sworn you were talking about the weather,” he said. “Guess it must be the jet lag getting to me.”

“You’ve been here a week.”

“And the jet lags barely getting to me,” he declared. “My body must’ve held off on it until the flight home. See this is why I fucking love myself, my body’s so thoughtful.”

“If you keep going on like this, I swear I'm going to –”

“Ugh, so fucking overdramatic. You give mom a run for her money. You know that right?” Adrian ran a hand through his messy dark brown hair. “Since you’re acting like you’re going to die if I don’t tell you what I think, then let me just say that he’s fine.”

“Fine?” she nearly shouted. “How can you just say he was fine after knowing him for – how long was it? Ah! Three days!”

“Are you hearing yourself? You’re yelling at me for saying he’s fine after being around him for three days. Three fucking days!” he shouted.

“Well you were only here for a week, so those three days are nearly half that time. And just so you know it wasn’t easy for him to have gotten yesterday and today off to spend time with us. He cancelled a public appearance with his grandmother, and he got told off really bad.”

“I don’t care if he had a public appearance to make. That means nothing to me.”

“It should,” she huffed. “He made an effort to be here, because he wanted you to get to know him. But you’ve been all critical and shit. And now . . . now that you’re about to leave, all you have to say is that he’s fine. You should have a better opinion!”

“What the hell do you want me to say? You want me to say that I think he’s fucking amazing and shits out rainbows? Is that what you want me to say? Because I'm not gonna say that crap. He’s alright. That’s my opinion of him. Do I think he’s good looking? No. I think he’s a goofy looking ginger, but you’re into that shit so, there you go. Do I think he’s like those fictional men that you’ve been obsessing over since you were ten? No. I don’t. He’s not the type of guy I would’ve ever gone out with and he’s not the type I’d go out of my way to set you up with. But despite my feeling that way about him, I can see that he treats you well, and I can tell by the way he looks at you that he genuinely loves you, so that makes him alright. That makes him fine. And that’s the highest praise I can give him.”

“I think you’re being hard on him.”

“Nah, ya think?” He shook his head at her. “I’ve got to be critical, chunky butt. You’re my little sister and I just want to make sure you’re with someone that deserves you.”

“No one’s ever going to deserve me according to your standards.” She huffed. “It took you a year before you thought . . . oh . . . oh, I get it!”

“Get what?” he questioned, confused.

“It took you over a year to say that Joaquin was fine. And you just said Harry was fine after a few days. So that . . . that means you secretly like him.”

“You’ve finally lost your mind.”

“Say what you want, but I know what you meant,” she said, very much pleased with how things had turned out. “Now if only Tom and Henry could hurry up we’d be able to head out.”

“They’re going to be awhile.”

“How do you know that?”

“Because Tommy wanted to give him a talk,” explained Adrian. “Don’t worry. He’s not planning on being harsh on him or anything. Tommy says I’ve been enough of a dick for both of us, but ah, I don’t agree with that.”

“So then do you know what he wanted to talk to him Henry about?”

“Not really sure, he didn’t tell me all that much. All he said was that he wanted to give Henry some advice and . . . well, I forgot what else he said, but it’s probably going to be one of those nice brotherly chats that Harry wasn’t going to get from me. The kind they put in movies where they bond. Hah. As if he’d get one of those from me. He’s going to get one later on, but it’s going to be a fucking warning.”

“I think you’ve warned and threatened him enough already.” Her hands dropped from the steering wheel. “Like yesterday I heard you tell him that all of you guys did wrestling in high school. That you’ve got secret moves for kicking people’s asses.”

“What? I was just telling him a story.”

“Telling him a story, my ass,” she cursed. “You were trying to intimidate him with that.”

Adrian smiled coyly. “You’re just being paranoid.”

“And you’re just being annoying, but that’s okay, I forgive you.” She leant back into the headrest. “I know I’ve already said this, a bunch of times, but thanks for coming out. It really means a lot to know that you guys flew out here because you wanted to look after me.”

“That’s what brothers do. We hear that our little sister feels like shit and we go out to the rescue. Only it turns out we really didn’t have to come, since things were sorted out for you. I seriously still can’t believe he brought a fucking mariachi here for you.”

“Me either,” she said. “I honestly went into shock when they started playing. I was like, what the fuck is he doing? But he had them there in this field of sunflowers and he had Christmas lights and . . . era como un sueño (it was like a dream).”

He wanted to tell not to completely lose herself in the dream. That it could end at any moment, but he couldn’t bring himself to do that. She just looked so happy. She was glowing and smiling in away that he’d never seen her before, and if that was that gingers doing then all he could do was hope that it’d last, and that if it were ever to come to and end that she’d be home so they could be there for her. Because he didn’t want to comfort her over the phone, he’d want to actually be there for her, take her to Disneyland, places she loved.

“I’ve never seen you like this.”

“I’ve never felt like this before,” was her soft response. “That sounds so fucking lame. I'm making myself want to gag.”

“Nah, that’s not lame. Sometimes you really do feel that way.” He reached over to her and patted her cheek. “Just make sure to take care of yourself. I know you’re smart, but sometimes when you’re in the moment a condom can be –”

“Adrian!” she cried, covering her face with her hands. “Don’t talk about that!”

“Why not?” asked Adrian. “We’re both adults.”

“Yeah, and we were both adults when you gave me the sex talk when I was twenty, and you told me that when people have sex they die. Well, it wasn’t just you, Rafa said the same thing.”

“That’s because we didn’t want you to have sex at all, but now that you’re having sex –”

“I'm on the shot!” she blurted out. “Okay? So don’t worry about anything happening, because as soon as the doctor gives me the shot, we schedule the next appointment for when I absolutely have to have it. I'm in control of all,” she motioned to her entire body, “this, because this bitch is not about to have any babies before thirty.”

“When did your ass get on the shot?” he questioned.

“Uh, I was . . . nineteen. It was during spring break. I went home and told Luis all about Joaquin, and well since Luis is the more reasonable one out of the three of you when it comes to me being an adult, he said I should get on birth control so that if I planned on having sex in the future I’d be alright. And he took me.”

“That fucking idiot,” mumbled Adrian.

Paulina chuckled. “I would’ve figured birth control out on my own. I'm not an idiot.” Her eyes darted to the building entrance, where Thomas and Harry were walking out of. “They’re coming.”

“About fucking time,” said Adrian, he rolled down the window. “Hurry up! We’ve got a fucking flight to catch!”

“Quit your, bitching!” bellowed Thomas from across the way, his dark brown eyes shining with amusement.

“He always like that?” asked Harry as he followed Thomas down the steps.

“Not really – never mind, yeah he is. Whenever there’s a set time to be somewhere, he freaks out over it. We can have an entire hour before we have to be at a party or a meeting, and he’s already walking around the house, screaming about how he’s going to be late. It’s ridiculous, but that’s how he is. And I'm always good about being places a few minutes early, that’s how I’ve always been, but this one has to be places twenty minutes early and then he makes us wait in the car until its five minutes before the set time.”

“That’s mental,” chuckled Harry. “I'm glad Paulin’s not like that. I mean, she’s good about being places on time, but she’s not one to be somewhere massively early, unless it’s an exam.”

“See that makes sense to me, but freaking out because you’re going to be late to a party where everyone else is going to actually be late for is ridiculous.” The trunk was opened and Thomas began to put his luggage inside. “He’s a little OCD over that stuff, but he’s a great guy.” He closed the trunk. “And we’re done. Come on, let’s get inside; I'm pretty sure Adrian will go crazy if we don’t get in soon.”

Sure enough, Adrian was starting to panic. He was beginning to freak out over whether or not they’d have enough time to get to London-Heathrow Airport, get through security, and board their flight. They still had more than enough time to get there, but Adrian – true to his style – started looking up alternate flights and contemplated whether he should contact the airline and ask if they could reschedule.

Luckily for them, traffic was so light that even Adrian’s fears were quickly put to rest. Not that he voiced his ease to his companions. Oh no, to them, he kept talking about how afraid he was that they weren’t going to make it on time, and how they should’ve woken up an hour earlier. Thomas and Paulina, knowing very well that Adrian was only complaining for the sake of complaining, ignored him. But Harry, not being familiar in the ways of Adrian, felt bad about having been the last to wake up, and even offered to get the tickets for another flight. Thomas thanked him, but told him that they were going to get to the airport on time and that Adrian was just talking to hear the sound of his voice.

When they arrived at the airport, Paulina drove them to the short stay parking complex. It was an easy distance from the check in area, and wasn’t packed with photographers that were waiting for celebrities to leave the airport, which was ideal since Harry had torn his wig, and was only wearing his sideburns with a beanie covering his messy red hair.

Paulina went to a nearby cart dispensary and put in the necessary euro to be able to use the cart, and as soon as she was back at their parking spot, Thomas and Adrian began piling on the luggage. They hadn’t expected to take much home, most of the space in their bags had been food and clothes that their parents and other siblings had sent her, but during their stay in England – and holidays in Brighton and London – they ended up going on a few shopping sprees so now their bags were just as heavy as when they’d first landed in London.

“I think we’ve got everything,” spoke Adrian when they finished loading the cart. “We should probably head over to the check in area. Don’t want to miss the check in time. Awe, come on, chunky butt, don’t start with the crying.”

“I'm not crying, there was just something in my . . . oh fuck you, I can cry if I want to cry.” Paulina wiped away a few stray tears with the back of her jacket.

“Aye mi Paulinita (oh my little Paulina), get over here.” He opened his arms and she walked right into them, burying her face in his chest as he held her. “You know we’d stay longer if we could, but we have to get back for work.”

“I know,” she mumbled. “I'm just gonna miss you guys.”

“And we are too, but who knows, maybe you can come home for Christmas, stay a few weeks and then fly back out. And if you can’t do that, then remember that we’re going to be here next year for your graduation, we all promised we would if you got the scholarship, and everyone’s saving up already.”

“Really?” she asked, her voice soft, childlike.

“Really,” he confirmed. “Everyone’s going to fly out, well, everyone except for the kids, since Rafa and Teresa want to make it into a mini vacation, but other than that, everyone’s gonna come. Now give me a besito (kiss), so I can give you the bendición (blessing), and Tommy and I can get on our flight.”

She placed a soft kiss on his cheek, and when she pulled away, he did the sign of the cross and uttered the blessing their mom always gave them whenever they left the house. Neither of them was a particularly devout Catholic. They broke commandments on a fairly regular basis, and had beliefs that were frowned upon by the church, but they’d been raised Catholic, going to mass on Sundays, taking communion, and having their parents give them blessings were a part of them. So they kept on with tradition, because it felt like home to them.

After having placed a kiss on her forehead, Adrian walked over to Harry, whom was just saying his goodbyes to Thomas. He’d already given Harry plenty of warnings, but now that he was about to leave for at least another year, Adrian felt it only right to make his sentiments known one final time.

“I know I’ve been hard on you this week, but I'm sure you understand where I'm coming from. As an older brother, I'm very protective of my sister and want to make sure she’s doing as well as she can be.”

“That’s perfectly understandable, Adrian. And I truly want you to feel at ease about my relationship with her. I truly do love her, and don’t wish to wrong her.”

“I know you do. I can tell by the way two are around each other.”

Harry smiled in relief.

“But I want to make something perfectly clear to you, if you fuck her over, break her heart or make a fool of her, you’re going to have to answer to me and my brothers, and we won’t give a fuck if you’re a prince. We’ll show you how we handle. Is that clear?”

Taken aback, all Harry could do was nod.

“Glad we got that cleared up.” Adrian stepped forward and gave Harry a very brief hug. “It was good meeting you.”

Harry watched in confusion as they walked away, and when Paulina could no longer see her brother or her future brother-in-law, she slipped her hand into Harry’s and gave it a gentle squeeze.

“He threatened you didn’t he?” she asked, quietly.

“Said they’d show he how they handle,” he said. “What does that even mean?”

She hesitated for a moment, but eventually spoke. “That just means they’ll beat the shit out of you, but they won’t. They’ve never actually hit anyone – well, that’s a lie, Luis punched someone for me once, but other than that they’ve never actually done it. They just like intimidating people and asserting themselves.” She gazed up at him. “Sorry about that.”

“S’alright. Wasn’t upset by it, was just taken aback. Blokes are usually very keen when they see a sister or cousin with me gives them a bit of fame, it does, but your brother, he just wanted to make sure you’d be alright. I respect that.”

“I'm glad you do. And I just wanted to thank you for having been so polite to my brother even when he was being dick. I can’t imagine it was easy humoring him when he was glaring and making those comments, but it means a lot to know you put up with him. And if it makes you feel any better, Luis likes you.”

“He does? But we’ve not even met.”

“You might not have met, but he was there the necklace and flowers showed up. And he was there every single day you sent flowers so he appreciated the dedication.”

“But didn’t he – I mean wasn’t he turned off by what they were saying in the media?”

“Not really. It was weird, he said that yeah you fucked up, but that you were trying to set things right and since we weren’t technically together you didn’t do anything wrong. He got punched in the gut when he said that, but he likes you.”

“Well I'm glad one of the men in your family doesn’t hate me.”

“Oh, the other’s done hate you, they’re just not your fans.” She scrunched her nose. “How about we go back to my place? I don’t have any guests, anymore.”

“Is that so?” He placed his hands on her hips and pinned her against the rental. “Well I suppose we’re going to have to take advantage of that.”