Arrangements

"Okay, I know your birthday isn't for another 48 hours, little Storm, but I need to give you your gift now."

All of us -Ray, Bob, Mikey, Frank, Gerard, Allie and Astrid- were at Denny's getting food at 12 am. We planned to pull out in an hour, and Astrid wanted to celebrate my birthday since I wouldn't be home to. 

"Astrid, you didn't have to get me anything." I sipped my lemonade. 

She swing her arm around me, "Yes I did. You've been paying my half of the rent for a while now...I deserve to get you somethin'." I rolled my eyes, "It's from me and Frankie." she pulled out a small jewelry box.

If I could count on Astrid to give me a gift, it was always jewelry.

I took the small, blue box and opened it. Inside were these skull studs. I smiled, "Oh my god, thanks! These are fuckin' cool, Trid."

"It goes with our gift," Allie spoke up next to Mikey. 

I turned to them, "I told you no gifts, remember?"

Allie nodded, "Yeah, but c'mon, it was a set." She pulled out a small, black box that matched the blue one, and slid it over to me.

I opened the box and saw a skull ring. It was like a steam-punk one, it was amazing, "Whoa. Al, Mikey, thanks." I looked up at them and slipped it on my index finger, "This is rad."

"Glad you like it," Mikey smiled, "we couldn't really figure out what you like. Astrid said you're indecisive about things."

I giggled, "Yeah, I'm not really sure what I like."

I felt Gerard's eyes on me, watching me. He was across from me, far end of the table. His hazel eyes shown green, dark and brooding. I had a feeling he was upset, but he didn't say anything. I had hoped he wasn't pissed, because I didn't want to here it.

-

After we ate we went back to the bus, and I hugged Allie, then moved onto Astrid. She hugged me tight, "Ugh, I miss you already!"

I smiled, "I miss you too. Two more weeks." I told her.

"I know, I know. Are you comin' back here or straight to Jersey?"

"Jersey. I gotta check on Papa. Mama says he's okay, but who knows." I shrugged slightly.

"Call me if anything happens." she hugged me once more and kissed my head, "Me and Al will be in Jersey by the time you guys get there."

I nodded, "Please, pick out nice bridesmaid dresses."

I gave a slight frown, "Will do."

I kissed her forehead, "I love you, Trid."

"Love you Stormy!"

I sighed heavily, climbing onto the bus. The guys had all gotten settled when I got on, and Eugene was starting up. Ray and Bob disappeared a second later towards the back, and Mikey and Frank lingered at the window, waving bye to the girls. Gerard, he was sitting at the small table having a smoke. I sat on the couch, pulled my knees up and rested my head on them.

"Storm, c'mere." Gerard spoke heavily.

I looked back at him, curiously glancing at his eyes...they were softer now. I stood slowly and walked over to him, he took my had and pulled me towards the bunks. I didn't ask or question him as he pulled me inside his clear bunk and wrapped his arms around me.

"What's all this?" I asked finally, the bus moved slowly, causing drowsiness.

"I need you." He said softly.

"Are you comfortable?" I asked, turning into sort of a 'mommy' mode.

"Why?"

"You have your jeans on still, they're pretty tight."

He didn't say anything as he unwrapped his arms from me and worked on his jeans. He kicked them to the edge of his bunk and went back to holding me. He buried his face in the crook of my neck, lying feathery kisses there.

It took a lot for me not to respond. I was yearning for him inside, even if he was a dick. This Gerard always won me over.

"I want you, Stormy." He finally said.

It finally hit me. That's why he was being sweet. He wanted to fuck me.

"You want me?" I repeated it, as if it were a question.

"Yes," his breath hit my throat, and I was fighting myself not to be turned on, "I want you so bad." 

I felt the tip of his dick on my hip and I wanted to knee it. But, I swallowed thickly and nodded. "Whatever you want." I said softly.

"On your side." He instructed.

I turned on my right, feeling Gerard  pull down my sweats. Tears prickled my eyes as he moved my panties to the side and spread my cheeks. I held my breath as he found my entrance, he sucked in a sharp breath, and then I felt moistened fingers spread me apart. 

Gerard put his hand on my back, "Bend, Sugar." he instructed huskily.

I bent a little, I felt his tip at my entrance and then he pushed in. I shut my eyes and waited. He moved slowly, his left hand gripping my waist, thrusting slowly. It wasn't pleasurable, or enjoyable. I felt like a whore, like I was being used.

Well, hell of course I'm being used.

It was all silent, Gerard didn't moan or groan or grunt. The sex lasted 10 minutes before he shifted his hands up my shirt, his thrust growing sloppy, and he pinched my nipples. I let out a small gasp, out of surprise, and felt him release inside of me. He let out a small groan, and stayed inside of me, hands still groping and kissed at the back of my neck. I felt more than disgusted...I felt angry.

Gerard pulled my sweats up, "Thanks Sugar." 

I wanted to punch him in the nuts, but I didn't. I was doing this man a favor. He was doing me and my father one, so why not? Who cares about how I feel at the end of the day? As long as everyone is getting what they want.

You only live once.

-

The following day, I returned to what I was in this bus. An empty shell. A little lost lamb with her sheep herder, Gerard Way. 

It seems as wherever he went, I had to go. I played nice, saying hello and only speaking when spoken to. I didn't dare talk to the other bands as lunch or during sound check, and I smiled whenever people brought up the fact that Gerard was my fiancée.

The smile was bullshit, just like the marriage.

Gerard seemed to buy into it, he didn't say anything. 

He held my hand, almost as if it were a chore. He didn't like it, and you could tell, just by the hesitant and reluctant way he grasped it. I felt even more unwanted by this man. Well, I was wanted, just because of the "need" between my legs. I really think he was trying to break me down.

At the end of the night, we planned to go out to eat and I would pay. I needed to get away from Gerard, or at least be around others with him. As we all began to go, we couldn't find him.

"Where is he?" I asked Worm.

Worm gave me shifty eyes, "Dunno."

He lied for Gerard and I hated it. First Gerard wanted me to fucking stay with him, and then he disappears. I was so tired of this, I was ready to head out with the guys, when I got a feeling. A gut wrenching feeling to look over by more buses. I went further into the dark, but didn't call his name, and I'm glad I didn't.

I found him, near some trees, with another girl. She was opposite of me; she had big breast, long blonde hair, and long, curvy legs. She was touching him, and he her; she moaned his name, and my stomach wracked. They began fucking a second after I made them out in the dark. It was sick that I watched, but I couldn't pry myself away; I felt hurt.

I was betrayed again.

"Hey!" Worm's voice didn't startle me, I heard him coming.

Gerard and the pretty woman gasped, and stopped. I turned my head and followed Worm back towards the buses. I climbed on, hearing him try to explain, "It's okay Worm." I said softly.

He gave me an apologetic glance and sat down. Frank and Ray eyed me, "We still going to eat?"

I shook my head, "I don't feel well. Here," I dug into my jeans and gave them a 100 bill, "go nuts."

Frank and Ray just looked at me, unsure of what to say, "Uh...Storm..."

"It's on me. Don't need it anyway." I waved it off.

I headed back towards my bunk, grabbed some pajamas and changed. I could hear Frank saying something, but not entirely what. He was waiting for me when I came out the bathroom, "You want anything?"

"Cherry Coke and onion rings." I said nonchalantly.

He smiled, "Okay. I'll bring back your change." he kissed my cheek and headed off the bus.

I put my hand to my cheek, feeling the affection and care feel my skin, "Dammit Frankie." I said to myself.