Awesomeness Personified

Days holed up in my bedroom wallowing in a pit of self pity and despair: 9

Days left until school starts again: 1

Days in which I’m going to continue wallowing in my bedroom in a pit of self pity and despair: 0

I have finished. I’m done. I’m over.
This my friends is the first day to the rest of my life.

I didn’t really like being depressed; it’s not really my cup of tea to be honest.
It was OK the first two or three days when I cried until my eyes were red raw and when everyone felt sympathetic towards me, I kind of felt loved.

My best friend Leah came round and stayed with me for the entirety of the first three days and consoled me and fed me fatal amounts of chocolate. That was fun, although I don’t think she appreciated my constant nose blowing. I had been cry solidly for 72 hours remember and my mucus glands must have been working overtime (there’s a nice image for you all.)

My mom has been really sweet too, saying reassuring things to me and so on.
“There’s plenty more fish in the sea.” She kept saying whilst trying to fumigate my room. Since I was wallowing in a pit of self pity and despair I refused to get out of my Hello Kitty pyjamas or open the windows or have a wash for that matter, meaning my room was a little on the musty side.

But I didn’t want another fish, I was perfectly happy with the fish I had. Only my fish had swam off to the other side of the world to live in Australia, meaning I’d probably never see him again.

Of course when I say ‘fish’ I don’t mean an actual fish. What type of freak is in love with a fish I ask you? Well not me, I’ll tell you that for free.

My fish (Ok, I’m over with the fish metaphors now) was called Jay and he was my one and only boyfriend. We met in Year 7 and were friends and then last summer officially started going out. It was great, knowing there was someone there for me other than Leah, my mom, my older brother Frankie, my little sister Jersey, my other friend Callum….
Actually come to think of it I have lots of people there for me.
Mmm, never realised that before.

Anyway where was I before I ever so rudely interrupted myself? Oh yes, Jay. My ‘fish’. Jay left nine days ago leaving me single and wallowing in a pit of self pity and despair.
Only I woke up this morning with a positive outlook on life for the first time in nine days.

Why should I suddenly put my life on hold because Jay has gone?
It’s not as if he dumped me, we just had to split up because of geographical reasons. I don’t blame him and he left as my friend, not an enemy.

This is when I came to the conclusion that I don’t need him to be happy. I’ve got my whole life in front of me and great family and great friends.
I don’t need a boyfriend anyway; I’ve got plenty of time for that jazz when I grow up.
Plus school starts again on Monday and I’ll be starting Year 10. I’ve got my GCSE’s to study for. I don’t want to mess them up so that practically ten years of education has gone down the proverbial toilet.

I need to concentrate on me.

Suddenly a wave of happiness flooded over and I did the unthinkable, something I hadn’t done in nine whole days…

I opened the window.

I opened it as wide as possible and stuck my head out, the early September air filling my lungs as I inhaled deeply.

“Aaah oxygen! Freedom! Life!” I called out happily, checking first that no one was walking past as if they had heard me it would be humiliation in the extreme.

Only my symbolic gesture of freedom was spoilt when a pigeon very kindly swooped precariously low and gracefully landed on my head, wildly flapping me with its wings.

“Ow! Get off! Ow, ow, ow….GROSSAGE!”

I felt something wet trickle on my head as the pigeon loudly flapped away leaving me with what can only be described as pigeon crap on my head.

Great, just great.

Welcome to the first day of the rest of my life.