Affinity

"Stella." The faint sound of voices came into the room.

"Should we take her to the hospital?"

"No, She just passed out. She'll be fine."

I felt myself being lifted and placed on what I assumed was my bed. The smell of alcohol shot throughout my nose. My eyes shot open and Joel was hovering over me.

"Thank God." he said as he leaned down and kissed my forehead.

Halvo was right behind Joel ready to embrace me next.

"Don't do that ever again." He said tightly hugging my shoulders.

"Well tell my body that."

Another figure made way into the room and took me by surprise.

"Kennedy?" I asked sitting up slightly getting a better view.

His voice was small and his hands stuffed into his pockets.

"Hey." He moved in closer as Joel and Halvo eyed him down. "I just wanted to know you were okay."

I shot a look at Halvo and he shrugged his shoulders making his way out, Joel followed suit.

"Stella, I want you to come to El Paso with us." He placed his hand on my knee rubbing small circles.

I flinched at the unfamiliar touch and he moved his hand, mouthing 'sorry.'

"I don't."

"Just forget about John. You'll have a whole ranch, to do as you please. See who you please."

For the first time in my life something in my head clicked. My body stiffened and a smile spread across my face. Perhaps Kennedy was right, maybe I need to get out, forget about everything. Regardless of who gets in my way or who I see along the way. A certain unsettling rose in my stomach, there was still things I wanted to know. Why John had left me, who he was hiding and what does Pat know.

So many questions floating in the air.

Waiting.

I focused my attention back to Kennedy who was watching me closely. I gave him a small nod and he smiled brushing a loose strand of hair off my face. He made his way out turning to look at me once.

I got up grabbing various suitcases throwing them onto my bed. I grabbed a handful of clothes shoving them into the suitcases. There was a soft knock on the door and Joel appeared at the door.

He stayed quiet as he watched me pack. I looked at him and he gave me a loose smile.

"I need to go Joel."

"You don't need to go there, there's so many other places." He shook his head as he walked towards me.

"Joel."

"Stella, don't leave me again. Think about school, about your life."

"I'm tired of thinking. I just want to have some fun, with my friends."

He flinched as though I had offended him. "What I'm I to you then?"

"I didn't mean it like that." I sighed and grabbed his hand. "Joel Kanitz, you are my best friend, my brother, my sanity and I owe you the world." I felt my breath hitch as my eyes began to water.

"Stella Turner, you never cease to amaze me."

He sniffed and wiped his eyes. He regained his composure and smiled.

"I believe whatever you're off to do, whoever." He winked and I slapped his arm. "I have faith in you."

He kissed my forehead and I began crying uncontrollably.

"I'll help you finish packing."

After we had finished packing Joel set my suitcases near the front door.

"Get some sleep." He spoke as he gave me a small nod.

~

There was a loud honk and I raced to get dressed heading down. Joel following with my suitcases, which he piled in the back of the guy's van. He quickly embraced me muttering a thousands "I'll miss you.", "Don't do anything stupid." "Take care of yourself." and "I love you."

I made my way towards the front seat not wanting to deal with the chaos that was about to ensue in the back. More so not wanting to breathe the same awkward air as John who was all the way in the back. Garrett was driving and pulled out of the curb. I waved like a maniac at Joel who was fully prepared with a tissue as he waved it frantically above him. This was it, I was on my quest for all the answers.

Halfway through the drive we stopped at a sketchy gas station.

"BATHROOM." Pat shouted as he ran towards the connivence store.

"Air!" John shouted as he stretched causing his shirt to ride up. Revealing a tiny sliver of his V tattoo.

I desperately wanted to know what was going through his head. Was he thinking about me? Was he angry at me? Did he still love me? Do I still love him?

"Stella?" Kennedy spoke, waking me from my thoughts. He held a cup of coffee motioning it towards me. "Just how you like it, milk and sugar."

I took it from his hands and smiled. Okay, how did he know that. Why is he being so..not Kennedy.I shrugged the thought as I reentered the van propping my legs up onto the dashboard.

A few hours we arrived to a gate that read "Sonic Ranch." We drove down the long unpaved road till we reached a unmarked white house with a three trees lined perfectly in front of it. We unpacked and as I walked in the living room, I swear this is where I belonged. The dark wooden floors that lined it contrasted the dark red couches that were pushed up against the wall. I paced through the house attempting to claim a bedroom. It was the very last one and it followed the same floor pattern as the living room. Rich wooden floors and white walls. A desk was neatly placed in the corner made from wood as well. I inhaled and let the smell of fresh wood travel my body. My thoughts were interrupted when there was a knock on the door. It was Pat, he made he way towards the chair that was positioned in the corner.

"Stella." He said sending me a crooked grin.

"Patrick." I say eyeing him and placing a hand on my hip.

"I-I, Well I want you to know the truth." He sighed running a hand through his messy hair. "I'm tired of feeling like I'm in the middle of a soap opera."

We both chuckled in unison.

"I can't. As much as I want to. I can't. He needs to tell you, not me."

"Pat, I am tired as much as you are. I feel like I'm not sure what is going on with anything. I feel so lost, confused."

He smiled warmly taking one of my free hands. "You're a strong girl. I have faith in you."

He walked away and closed the door behind me. I was so empty, it was ridiculous. I needed to feel something, I needed to feel wanted. My body ached and my mind spun. I walked towards his room opening his door. He stood there motionless as I inched closer our breaths slowed. Closing the gap we both fell down onto the bed.