Her Diamonds

I stood there in shock. How was I going to tell him that his step mother had cancer, again? I could feel my eyes welling up with tears, and I was speechless. My eyes burned and I coulde feel a lumo forming in my throat. I took a sip of my coffee while Bill looked at me, waiting for an answer. I cleared my throat and looked him straight in the eyes "let's go outside for a minute" I said to him. "tell Jess she can come too, well tell her she has too. This is important" with that we left the hospital and walked to a bench outside of the hospital.

"What's going on dad?" Jess asked. I could tell she knew something was wrong just by the worried expression on her face. I knew right there and then I could not fool her, she was an at home nurse so if I lied and said I was here for myself she would be able to see right though it.

"Well, you see. Nancy was worried about a lump in her hip and well..." my voice trailed off as hot tears ram down my face. I had such a firm grip on my coffee cup that the paper folded into itself releasing the hot liquid inside of it all ove my hand. "Fuck! That coffee is hot!" I exclaimed when the pain finally computed to my brain, I pulled my hand away from the coffee and dropped my cup.

"I thought the lump was from Nancy hitting her hip or something. Dad, you need to be straight forward with me. I know what I'm talking about when it comes to injuries and you better not lie to me." Jess said while she picked up the now empty coffee cup.

Bill looked really concerned, his big blue eyes were starting to fill up with tears. The only time I have ever cried in front of him was when I told him Nancy had cancer the first time around.

"Dad! Did it, does she. Oh WHY?!?" Billy cried out. He put his hands over his face, as if he was going to try hiding the tears from. His voice sounded like he was standin in hot coals. I will never forget the pain I heard as he shouted out those words.

I looked over at Jess, she had a puzzled look on her face. "How, when did this happen? How long have you known for?" now Jess was crying too. She was practically like family, her and Bill have been together for almost 5 years now. This must be hurting her so much, Nancy was like a second mom to her.

I looked from Bill to Jess, and back to Bill again, "a few weeks" is all that I said. I wrapped my arms around Bill and then Jess wrapped her arms around the both of us, to the best of her ability. All kinds of crazy thoughts rushed through my head; is Nancy going to survive another round of chemo, how much longer does she have, will she make it this time?

My body shook as I silently sobbed. Tears were streaming down my face, Bill and Jess had tears running down their faces too. I can't make them feel any better and that is almost as worse as finding out Nancy had cancer. I can;t do a thing to change the way they feel and I can't do a thing to make Nancy better.

Jess pulled her arms away from and wiped the tears from her face. How was her make-up still perfect? "I'm going to call Lisa and little Gary." with that she walked away and reached for her cell phone in her purse.

"I'm so sorry dad! Why does it have to be you? Why does it have to be mom?!" Bill tightend his arms around my shoulders. I could now feel him shaking because he was crying so hard.

I pulled away from his grip. "Do you wanna go see her?" I asked.

With that we walked back into the hosptial and walked into Nancy's room.