Not Your Every Razorblade Romance...

The looking glass, so shiny and new
How quickly the glamour fades
I start spinning, slipping out of time
Was that the wrong pill to take? (Raise it up)

You made a deal, and now it seems you have to offer up
But will it ever be enough? (Raise it up, raise it up)
It's not enough (Raise it up, raise it up)

Here I am, a rabbit hearted girl
Frozen in the headlights
It seems I've made the final sacrifice

This is a gift, it comes with a price
Who is the lamb and who is the knife?
Midas is king and he holds me so tight
And turns me to gold in the sunlight

And in the spring I shed my skin
And it blows away with the changing wind
The waters turn from blue to red
As towards the sky I offer it...Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up)/Florence + The Machine

Ville was pleasantly surprised when his thoughts where interrupted by some one bumping into him. When he looked down at the crippled mess of wine colored hair and black velvet. He wasn't the slightest bit upset, he welcomed the distraction. Realizing it was he who had bumped into her, Ville apologized and offered her his hand.

Eyes just a shade darker than her hair, gazed up at him and blinked, long dark lashes. Ville also realized she was very pretty. She looked at his hand and frowned for a moment before taking his hand and standing up.

"Um...thank you but I don't understand you," She spoke in English with a northern American accent. She was nervous. Ville was taken back, she didn't look like the average tourist. He replied,

"Oh You're new here? Well I'm very sorry... I should have been looking where I was going, may I help you carry your things back to your house, or at lest pay for a cab." Ville spoke, still looking into her eyes. They were the most amazing shade in-between brown and red. He thought about Joanna, how he should at lest text her if he was planning on fallowing this young attractive foreign woman home.

"Um…I don't want to take your money," She replied blushing slightly, he smiled kindly and knelt down to pick up the bags.

"Than at lest let me carry these for you, how far do you live?"

"About a block or so up the road, the wooden boarding house." He grinned,

"I know that place, it's only a few doors down from where I live. I'm Ville, by the way" They began walking as tiny bits of white fluff fell from the sky, Ville noticed the flakes were the exact same shade as her skin, he wondered what her name was,

"V-e-e-l-a-y…"She repeated rolling it off her tongue slowly, Ville found her accent enduring. She blushed and shook her head, wine ribbons rippling, she replied, "I'm Miriah," Her beautiful eyes glowed,

"That's a lovely name it suits you." Ville hit himself mentally, “That didn't sound creepy at all...”.

"Thank you," She smiled.

"You’re welcome, sweetie." Ville hated being in this situation, feeling an attraction to someone and not being able to fallow his heart, why did he fool himself he was still in love with Joanna? He indulged himself and asked her, "So what made you move to our tiny country?" “I hope Joanna doesn't call me, telling me to come home..”

"Work. Well, sort of. I'm a writer, well trying to be. I've been writing this book for almost three years now and I've only got three chapters and have almost no clue where it's going. I found a editor here who promised to help me out if I had moved here and that's what happened. I'm feeling a bit lost actually." Ville nodded still smiling,

"Well, I can understand that. I mean it must be hard leaving everything you know and going somewhere so different." “ Like being a musician who can never keep love.”

"And I don't even speak the language." They both looked at each other before laughing, Ville was not sure what to make of Miriah. He was telling himself, “You are not cheating just because after having a fight you, in the middle of your brooding walk, meet and get to know a pretty American girl. It would be cheating if when you get to her house, she invites you in and you fuck her. There is a big difference, you deserve to meet someone in a normal, everyday situation. Maybe if you become friends, you can even ask her advice about what to do about Joanna. If you become friends, that is.”

~*~

When we arrived at my home, I asked Ville in to be polite. He gladly agreed and I showed him around, he seemed surprised by my colorfully decorated corner of the world. His eyes searched over my book and music collection. He picked up my original Vinyl Black Sabbath album and his smile grew.

“I a big Sabbath fan myself,” he put the album back leaning against the wall, and turned around in one spot, removing his scarf. “You can tell a lot about someone from their house. Like for example, just from seeing your books and music- you are a nerdy metal head?” Ville stated and asked at the same time. I giggled,( I always giggle around people I find attractive, it's so embarrassing because I know how lame and annoying I seem.)

“You are correct, although that was pretty easy to figure out. You just had to look at 'Black Sabbath' and 'The Hitchhiker’s Guild To The Galaxy”, and it was a dead give away.” He nodded in agreement and sat down on the red velvet loveseat. He looked good sitting on it, his dark clothes and his pale skin creating contrast against the intensity and depth of the color and texture of the sofa. I smiled when realizing this was the first time I had a guest over. This was my home now and I could invite anyone I wanted inside. That was a surreal moment, both exciting and frightening, like the experience of meeting Ville and talking to him, (At this time I had no idea that he was famous.) I thought he was one of the most interesting, attractive people I'd ever met and I hadn't even known him an hour yet.

“So, how do you like it here in Hell-sinki so far?” He said, removing his beanie and putting it next to him with his scarf. His hair was cropped short and spiky, and dyed jet black. (No one with his skin tone has it that dark naturally.) My hair was naturally dark brown, but I dyed it burgundy. I can't remember the exact shade of my natural color. I drew my attention from his eyes and walked to the kitchen. I sat the bags on the counter and started to put things away in the cabinets.

“I love what I've seen of it. Besides my editor and his staff, you are the only person I've met in Finland, so far. I haven't applied for citizenship yet, I have to do a few months of work before I can apply.” Ville tilted his head to the side, before standing up and gilding over to the opposite side of the island counter that separated the living room from the kitchen. He placed his hands on the counters and bent his head downward, level with my face. I felt a chill shiver through me meting his pricing stare. I felt like he was seeing through me, not that he wasn’t seeing me, or seeing me naked...that he was trying to see the real me.

“I am honored than, on the behalf of Finland, I officially welcome you to the country!” He smiled and held his hand out. I smiled and reached over the counter and shook his hand.

“Thank you, I am glad to be here!” We laughed and I continued to put away the food. Ville walked around the counter and leaned his butt against it. I paused for a moment and turned towards him with a frown forming.

“You know, this is a bit odd. We just ran into each other and I feel like we're already friends. I usually don't interact with people this easily. I get nervous and can't shut up and I keep stating the obvious over and over, and than I...-” I began to laugh as I realized in horror what I was doing, my heart felt like it was beating in my throat. “I- can't-giggle-Stop-snort-Laughing...” I gasped as I held my sides. Ville chuckled and I laughed harder hearing his strange, hiccup-like-laugh. It was so nerdy it was adorable. The only bad thing about the moment was I really couldn't stop laughing. “Oh damn...if I pass out from laughing and piss myself again I going to die.” Ville stopped laughing and genuine concern came over his features.

“Um, Miriah? Are you alright?” He asked, hovering his hand near my back, as if unsure if it was okay to touch me or not. Thankfully, hearing his voice say my name brought me into recovery. I slowly began to take deep breaths and straightened myself. I reached out and took Ville's hand that still hovered. I wasn't sure why, my body just wanted to touch him. Ville didn't seem taken back, he just squeezed back and a soft smile turned up the corner of his lips. He was ridiculously charming, I felt like I was in a badly written fan-fiction about romance. “This is surreal.”

“Thank you for the concern, and sorry if I freaked you out. I'm a total dork sometimes.” I lowered my eyes from his intense gaze. “God, he sees right through me with those eyes...” His devilish smirk grew and he slowly let go of my hand, my fingers slipping from his reluctantly.

“It's completely alright, it's been an interesting evening meeting you, and I don't regret a moment of it.” I couldn't help but blush and turn away to finish putting my cans in the cabinets. Ville changed the subject and asked about my family, where I was from. I paused, before slowly lifting myself to sit on the edge of the island counter. Ville leaned against the sink directly across from me, his arms crossed and his eyes narrowed and calculating. I wasn't sure where to say I was from in one short answer, nor could I say what kind of family I had in one word, so I decided to tell him my brief history on this earth.

“Well, I can't explain it in one or two words...so if you really want to know I'll give you my best summary of my life so far.” Ville's eyebrows raised slightly as his expression became more open.

“I would love to hear it, do you mind if I smoke?” he reached into his jacket, I shook my head.

“No, go head,” he lit the cigarette and I began, “I was born and lived on a reservation in Ohio for nine years of my life. During that time I learned to hate the white man-I;m kidding,” 'He actually smiled at my lame joke... “What I really learned was, I was an outsider within a outsider's community. I got teased a lot more being mostly white and not knowing any of the Cherokee’s traditions because my mother had not been raised in the culture. Her mother, although she was almost full-blooded native did not live on a reservation and like my parents for the latter part of my childhood, traveled in a bus. She raised seven children of all ages. I don't even remember all of my first cousins names. So none of us were really happy there, my parents had always dreamed of traveling north to find the perfect place to settle down. My dad found a motor-home for sale and we left at the end of that summer. It was sad and scary and exciting all at the same time. My brother hated leaving, he had gotten along with most of the boys on the res, but once we were on the road, seeing new places and meeting new people- we all fell in love with the open road. It wasn't all cupcakes and rainbows though, we were and had always been poor as dirt. It never bothered me growing up, still doesn't now because no matter what my parents always found a way to fed, cloth and bath us. We had everything we needed, but often we didn't get what we wanted. For birthdays we'd write each other songs, or make necklaces out of shells. We traveled down and up the north coast and my parents finally settled in Portland, Oregon. Although I was born in Ohio on the reservation, I consider myself from Portland.” Ville listened quietly, smoking his cigarette as eloquently as I've ever seen anyone smoke before. He asked me a question when I was finished.

“Dose your family still live there?” I nodded, and felt a slight ache in my heart. I already missed them.

“Yes, we were very close. Much closer than the average family. I miss them terribly already.”

“I know what that's like, I don't get to see much of my family either.” I suddenly realized I knew hardly anything about him besides his name.

"So I'm tried of talking about myself, tell me about you!" I smiled and batted my eyelashes,-it was almost painfully obvious that I was flirting with him,at lest he was returning it tactfully- He chuckled and shook his head gently,

"Well, I'm just a boring old bloke really, I'm in a band." My eyebrows perked up at that.

"Really? Tell me about that," ”Please be rock or metal, please be metal or metal...”

"Well we call ourselves HIM," I snorted a little, Ville laughed.

"I know, I hate the name, but can't change it now. We're a love metal band."

"What's love metal?" He thought for a moment,

"It's like Lemma and Madonna embracing in the sunset during a eclipse while Depeche Mode plays 'Black Sabbath'" We looked at each other for a moment before we both busted into laughter. The image was too much.

"Oh my god, that sounds so wrong." I gasped, wiping away tears. Ville nodded, still cracking up.

"It is wrong!" Once we could both breath again I asked what he did,

"I'm the singer," he replied, running his hand through his short hair, the texture was curly I could tell from the way it stood straight up with no product.

"What's it like?" I asked going back into schoolgirl with crush mode.

"Touring? Ok I guess, you get lonely, you get fucked up and you get tried. It's cool though, I can't complain, I've always wanted to do music and I'm lucky enough that people like my silly voice and corny songs that I can do what I love."

"Now, I really want to hear your songs,"

"Well you will by the end of the week, they play us on the radio all the time here."

"So your popular?" He shrugged,

"I can pay my own bills, we're trying to break into the states though. We're about to fly to L.A to record the new album. Right now we're taking a mini break before we have go, because even after the album is done there is the promotion, and than we start our world tour. Oh hell, I'm tried of talking about, I talk enough in interviews." He put out the cigarette butt in the sink, I opened the trash door on the island counter so he could toss it in.

"Sorry," I mumbled feeling guilty, he smiled again.

"I'll forgive you if you tell me more about you." I blushed and bit my lip bashfully.

"Well, I think I've already told you my life story!"

"Nag uh, you haven't told me about your book." Those green orbs laughing at my compete failing at not showing I was attracted to him.

"Well, forgive me if I start to rant and make no sense alright?" He nodded chuckling.

"So basically I started the story with my character, Allain. He's was born in the 1600s and was made into a vampire by his older sister's boyfriend," Ville's eyebrows raised but he stayed quiet.

" What happened was, his guy showed up new to their town, classic hammer film style , charms the girl and no one thinks he's weird but one person, that person being Allain. The vampire ends up killing his sister and Allain sees it, the vampire turns Allain against his will and Allain runs away scarred and confused." I took a short breath break.

" Years later Allain joins this circus where he can do just about anything because he's a vampire right? Well, he soon gets discovered and goes into hiding in the French country side in an old run down castle. He finds this young girl half dead and bleeding in the snow one day and helps her get better, over time he falls in love with her. The girl who he names Snow-white has no memory of who she was or why she was so badly hurt. So after a while Allain turns her into a vampire too and they're happy, but than somehow they're house so set aflame and they each think the other is killed. Snow-white goes to a town not far and runs into a pirate who lets her join his crew, she travels the world for years when Allain goes into a deep sleep. While all this is happening my this character Dark-Moon is a save to a tyrant, she is beaten raped and only keeps herself sane with the help of a magic user who teaches her how to go out of body when she's being abused. She gets free and has a run in with a vampire who you later learn is the one who made Allain and the one who set fire to the castle. " I took a deep breath.

"Dark-Moon moves to Japan and there they all live out until Allain wakes up in 2004 and sees how much the word has changed. He feels that Snow-white is still alive and forms a rock group writing songs about her hopping to draw her to him. Dark-moon becomes entranced by Allain and goes looking for him herself thinking he's making a call to her, Snow-white of course finds herself also looking for Allain who she thought was dead all those years. Snow-white and Dark-Moon meet and become friends boarding on lovers, both not knowing they're both looking for the same vampire. Dark-moon finds Allain first and doesn't tell him about Snow-white in hopes he'd forget her and love her instead. But soon Dark-Moon starts to feel guilty and falls in love with Snow-white not Allain. So she's stuck, all the while they're on the run from vampire hunters and Allan's maker who is bent on killing them all for unknown reasons." I sighed finishing, and Ville stared at me for a moment,

"That sounds very interesting, It sounds very complex." I nodded,

"Yeah it is, there's also so much I don't know yet. Like how's it's going to end or even why Allain's maker wants to kill them! I have to figure all this out within four months, that's how long my editor is giving me is should be enough but right now I have writer's block."

"It's a bitch." He agrees lighting another cigarette.

"So can I ask you a job related question without you freaking out?" Ville gives me a smirk that tells me he'll answer after he knows the question, so I proceed.

"What is music like to you?" Ville takes another drag and leans back, his face slightly frowns as he marls' it over.

"Um, it's like sex." I blinked and tried, oh Anne Rice, I tried not to laugh. "It's something that we don't need, but we need! You know? It gives me pleasure and it can be scary and humiliating when it goes wrong."

I laughed outright at that, Ville joined me and it eased the pain of embarrassment, because it meant he thought it was funny too. I loved his laugh, hearing that sound coming from him just made me feel even more hysterical.

Once we were done laughing, Ville stopped and sighed as his coat pocketed started to vibrate, he took a cell phone from his jacket and flipped it open.

"Oh fuck! I better go home!" He walked over to the sofa and picked up his coat and scarf. I felt my heart sink seeing him go. He shrugged on his coat, threw the scarf around his neck and pulled the beanie back on.

"I'm sorry for keeping you,"

"Nah, I enjoyed it. I really hope we can talk again. Oh I know, how about you come to my place tomorrow around five and you can met my finance, than we can go to dinner together." My heart sank even deeper within my chest, but I tried not to let it show. “He would have a girlfriend, if he didn't he must really be a psycho or gay. He still might be gay...' I agreed forcing myself to grin and he pulled me into a warm hug before kissing me on the cheek,

"Goodnight,"

"Goodnight," I called after him, in a daze I closed the door and touched my cheek where he had kissed me. “You are going to fall for him..” I sighed and got ready for bed. It was like watching a train wreck , you can't stop it, but can't look away.