Red Scars Shimmer on Your China Skin

I park the car outside the motel. It seems pretty. I lock the door and go inside. A small, blond girl welcomes me - Hi - she says, chewing a gum. She stares at me waiting for words that I can’t say. - Do you need a room?- she’s annoyed, and disinterested. I feel the skin in my face stretched and dry. I feel so lonely. My voice is stuck in my throat. I nod slightly. - Ok, I need your document a signature here and 25 dollars. Breakfast’s included.- she avoids my eyes, while I keep staring at her. I want her to see me. I want her to talk to me, to touch me. But she’s just a small, suburban girl. And I’m just a freak, a passing freak with a broken heart. How many of us do you see at days? Am I the only one? She disappears behind the door with my dollars. The key and license are there on the table. I wipe the tear on the border of my eye. She didn’t fell, she’s tired too.

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I go to the breakfast room. The girl from yesterday is serving the few customers. She comes to me. Today she doesn’t even try to smile or talk. She just stares at me and waits. I stare at her too. But then a strange sad smirk on her lips frightened me. She becomes to understand. I’m afraid she can really read me, read my pain, discover my soul, reveal who I am , what I’m looking for .
- Coffee and pie please- I avert my eyes and start to stare to the table. I hear her hesitate, I hear her breaths and then finally she leaves. She comes back almost a quarter later. I need her now. She’s leaving when I block her, holding her by the wrist.
-Hey!- she squirms
- I…I need some information- I say, not letting her go
- Do you know where “Villa Serena” is?-
-Let me go-
-Do you know?-
-Let me go and I’ll tell ya- she’ s scared, but she understand. I’m a freak but for others reasons. She sits down and watch me bad - Why are you searching a retirement house?-
- I.. I have business there. So where it is?-
- Not far from here. You need to take the highway for 20 minutes and then go out at the 258 exit. Follow the directions for the “Menlo Park”. You’ll find the direction along the way. Can I go, Sir?-
-Of course my lady, you were so gentle. Thank you for the horrible coffee-
She stares at me with disbelief. I’m too high now to pay any attention. I feel the blood boil in my veins. An hour and it’ll all end. A hour and I will bury you forever Gee.