Lose Yourself

I didn't know what to expect when I woke up the next morning. Food, that was for sure. Oddly enough, I wasn't just hungry. I was starving. And it seemed I wasn't the only one.

"Good morning?" Everyone was here—Jacob, Quil, Paul, Jared, Seth, Leah, Embry—and for no reason at all, that comforted me. Yeah, I had definatly lost all common sense.

Severl grunts of reply were heard, but no actual 'Good morning' back, aside from Embry, who had taken the time to swallow his food quickly and smile. "You look well rested."

I nodded, happily taking the seat Paul let up. "It's nice to hear the rain. But it gets a little cold, so I had to sneak another blanket."

"We're working on getting that fixed—shouldn't be any more than two weeks without heat." Sam said, placing a plate with an assorment of steaming eggs, bacon and toasts in front of me. "Until then, I suggest keeping your window closed and maybe wearing warmer pajama's."

"Sam," Haley said, "We just moved back from Miami. The warmest we have is a t-shirt."

"Oh," he didn't seemed to concered. Something caught his attention in the paper.

"Don't worry, I'll lend you some pairs of pants and a few shirts." said Emily, shoving a large spoonful of eggs into her mouth.

I smiled, "Thanks, Em."

- - -

"Have you got plans for the day?" Sam asked as he came downstairs, pulling a shirt over his head. "I know Jake, Embry and Quil are going down to the beach, why don't you tag along?"

I shrugged, glancing at Embry, "Isn't it cold outside?"

Jacob laughed, "C'mon, Lissa. We don't bite." This caused an uproar of laughter from the group sitting at the table.

"Speak for yourself," Quil said, holding his stomach, "I think Embry wouldn't mind taking a taste of her." This time, everyone except for Sam, Embry and myself laughed.

I swallowed and folded my arms, "Real mature. But," I looked at Jacob and Embry; both seemed at ease with the idea of a girl intruding their plans. "Sure, why not?"

Emily smiled, "Well, then I should help you find something warm." She grabbed my wrist and lead my up the stairs. "I don't think they should be big on you and they aren't the best looking sweaters in the world, but they'll keep you warm." She opened up the chest sitting in the hall, and pulled out a thick wool brown sweater. "Here," I pulled it on over my head, and rolled the sleeves a little to make them fit.

"It doesn't make me look.. chunky?"

"Lord no," Emily smiled warmly at me as I looked down at the sweater. "It flatters you, actually."

I pulled my lips into a tight line, "Thanks."

She rolled her pretty eyes, "Okay, go find yourself some jeans. I convinced Sam into letting you take the truck down to the beach, since we live a little far away." She pulled an object out of her back pocket. A set of keys, with a cliché 'La Push' keychain attatched to the set. "Sam figured since you'll be staying a while, you might as well deserve your own house key."

I held my hand out and watched as they fell into my hands. Three keys. One for the house, one for the truck, the last key I hadn't a clue of what it could be. I examined it in my palm quickly, then folded my fingers around them and smiled, "Thanks, again, Em. I really, really apprciate it."

"Melissa? Don't you have to get to ready to go somewhere?"

I just smiled, hugging her small frame tightly before I turned and bounced my way out of her room. Frantic, excited, palms sweating, heart racing I searched for a pair of jeans that would suffice. Particularily, a pair without holes. The closest I came was a pair that fit a little losely around my legs, but with the help of a belt, I tucked the keys into my pocket and stared at myself in the mirror.

I wasn't one for make-up. Or a fan of doing my hair. I pulled it back into a bun, the natural brown highlights of my hair shining in my rooms mirror. "Okay," I said, staring down my reflection. "Don't chicken out." I couldn't understand why I was nervous. It was Jacob. It was Quil. It was—

Embry.

Dear lord. I closed my eyes tightly. His body, so tall, so lean.. His hair shined magnificently, his eyes were deep, inviting pools of brown sugar. In a sense, he was perfect. With is chisled muscles, defined jawline, large hands—It was everything that I normally wouldn't look for. My normal was much different. But to me, Embry was impossibly attractive. It was so unrealistic. When I thought about him, everything changed.

I opened my eyes and found myself heated. I simply swallowed hard, and rushed outside. The truck sat parked where Sam had left it. Dark clouds hung overhead, but with confidence I waltzed up, and forceably pulled the door open. I shoved the key into ignition, started the engine and placed my hands on the steering wheel.

I twisted the key again and the roar of the truck came to a stop. I sat in the cab for a few minutes, staring at the trees for a long moment before I repeated my first actions and pulled out of the driveway.

The trip to First Beach was comforting. I realized I hadn't really forgotten the streets, and soon noticed that I had taken the longest way possible to the beach. I parked the truck, shut the engine off and sat, looking over the pebbled area. I saw them. Three tall men running around the shoreline with a football, barefoot, laughing and beautiful.

I had the oddest feeling that I might've been inturuppting something sacred. I wanted to drive back the Sam's and indulge myself in the living room, watching crappy con-artist television shows, but I felt drawn. I slammed the door of the old car and shoved my hands into the pouch in the front of the sweater.

How are they shirtless, it's freezing.

"Hey, look who it is!" I smiled pathetically when Quil awknowledged me. He put his arm around my shoulders.

"It's about time." Jacob said, tossing me the football, which I nearly fumbled.

"Yeah," Quil pipped, "Embry was starting to worry you were going to get lost or ditch us."

With angry eyes and a flushed face, Embry took the football from my hands and threw it at Quil with noticeable force, "Shove it."

"Don't bully Quil," I giggled. "Personally, I think it's kind of cute." I didn't know what I was saying. Things were coming out of my mouth, I giggled?

"Ouu." Jacob cocked his eyebrows up, and bit his lip. "She thinks it's cute."

Embry dropped his eyes and sighed, "Yes, Jacob. I heard."

"You know what this means, don't you?" Quil asked. "This means that little Embry doesn't stand a chance at being innocent anymore."

He shook his head, "You don't know what you're talking about."

Jacob snorted, "Oh, but look," He grabbed my face im his hand, squished my cheeks together and said, "She's just beautiful."

I blushed.

I pulled out of Jacob's grasp, stole the football from Quil and ran. "Hey, where are you going?" Embry called as I jogged down the shoreline.

I turned last minute and stared directly at him as I said, "I thought I came to play a game, not play around with boys."

He smiled so beautifully, "I like the way you think."