Without You, I'm Just Me

Naomi was shaking when Officer Winters came in. She had been smiling when she came in, but it dropped when she saw me. "Oh, Mr. Wentz."

"Hey," I said.

"I want him here," Naomi said before she could ask.

Officer Winters nodded slowly, "Whatever makes you comfortable."

Naomi's hand was in mine, our fingers interlaced. I gave her hand a squeeze, watching her; she inhaled and exhaled deeply. Officer Winters was getting her things out; notepad and recorder. Not long after, she jotted down something and then said, into the recorder; "I'm Officer Antoinette Winters interviewing Naomi Valentino, in regards to the attempted homicide on February 14th 2011."

Naomi bit at her lip. Officer Winters looked over at Naomi, "How old are you Naomi?"

"27."

"What was your relationship with the decease?"

Naomi took a moment, "He was my ex."

"How long had you known him?"

"3 years."

"On the night of February 14th, what were you doing?"

Naomi took in a short breath, "I was getting ready to fall asleep, I was in bed."

"Do you know what time the decease arrived at your home?"

"10:50," she swallowed now, "I remember looking at the clock. And he didn't arrive, he kicked in my door," her voice picked up.

"What happened after he kicked in the door?"

She squeezed my hand, "I left my room, I was afraid one of my boys got hurt. I called their names, they came out their rooms and I was going to grab my son Benjamin, because he was starting to cry, when Robert grabbed me."

"How did he grab you?"

Naomi demonstrated with her hands and arms; "He grabbed my hair and then he put me in a headlock. My sons were screaming at the top of their lungs and I was just...just frozen. Robert had a knife, I hadn't seen it, but I felt the blade on the back of my neck; he sawed through my hair and I was still frozen. I finally screamed when he slit across the back of my neck."

"What happened next?"

Naomi was silent, eyes filled with tears. I squeezed her hand again. She sniffed, "I told my sons to hide. I remember telling Lewis to hide Benji, and Rob stuck 3 inches of the knife into me--in my pelvis, under my belly button and then threw me on the floor. I landed...landed on my knees, shattering my right kneecap, and I just screamed and cried, trying to put my hand on my stomach, where I was bleeding."

"What did he do? Or say?"

"He told me to shut up. He called me a bitch," Naomi wiped her tears away with her free hand. "He shoved my face into the floor and started to choke me, I tried fighting his wrists, but I was too weak and I was afraid of the stab wound I had. He was calling me names and saying how he was going to kill me. He said he was going to make me ugly..." She paused. "Then he took my hands and knelt on them so I couldn't move or fight. He took the knife and," she used her hands to gesture stabbing and slicing motions in the air, "he sliced at my face, he was laughing about stabbing me."

"How long was the assault?"

She sighed, looking down, "An hour. He sat in my arms and my hands, keeping my down while he sliced at my clothes and my shirt. The knife got too bloody for him to hold after awhile and threw it across the room. He rolled me onto my back, and straddled my butt, saying he was going to--he was...going to have sex with me."

"Did he?"

Naomi shook her head, "He was yanking my bottoms off when my son--Lewis came and jumped on his back. Robert had stumbled, I tried to stand, yelling for my son to get help. Rob straddled my calves and hit me, so I was face forward on the floor, he pulled a gun out and all I heard was boom. I didn't even know he had had a gun until then. I thought Lewis was shot, and when I saw he wasn't, I told him to go get help, but--Lew, he couldn't, his hand was messed up and he as crying."

"What did you do?"

"I was screaming and yelling and Robert hit me in the face with the butt of the gun, and stood up. I told Lewy to hide, and I saw Benji out the corner of my eye, I told Lewy to go hide him, and Lewy yelled at Benji to hide," she exhaled, tears rolling down her cheeks, "Robert said something and then the gun went off, and I felt this burning pain in my back and my chest, and I rolled over. The gun going off must've scared him because he dropped it and it fell right beside my hand, so I grabbed it."

"And you fired at Robert?"

Naomi didn't nod. "He knelt over me, tryna grab it, but I got it faster than he could and I turned, shoved it under his chin and pulled the trigger."

"Why?"

Naomi and I looked at her incredulously. "Because he was going to kill me and my sons! When he was on top of me!"

"I'm sorry," Officer Winters said sincerely, "we just have to ask. What happened after, do you remember?"

"I threw the gun over towards Robert. I saw my son Lewis crawl over to me, crying about his hand and I told him to sit beside me," she began to cry. "I thought if I was gonna die, I wanted him beside me. Benji came out after a minute and I told him to get my phone and call for help...last thing I remember is my friend Ricky pressing a towel against my back."

"Had you talked to Robert before this incident?"

Naomi shook her head, "No. We had been in court the day before...I did not want to even look at him."

"Did Robert scare you before this incident?"

Naomi shook her head, "No. No, I didn't--I didn't think he would've went as far as he did."

"Did he harass you before then?"

"Yeah, a few months back, but I changed my number and he couldn't get a hold of me."

Officer Winters turned off the recorder, "Okay, Naomi, I'm going to need you to sign this statement."

Naomi sighed the notepad and handed it back. Officer Winters packed her things up in the bag she had brought and then thanked Naomi. She was gone, leaving us both alone and quiet.

"Are you okay?" I asked Naomi.

She nodded, "Yeah. I'm...tired."

I ran my thumb over her knuckles, "Lie back. I'll stay here with you until you fall asleep."

Naomi let out a soft sigh, "I wish I could come home."

I leaned over and kissed her forehead, "Me too, Navy, me too."


The days went by us quick. Naomi was informed her hospital stay would be 3 months, in total. She would be relearning how to walk and bend with her knee and sitting up without the pain from the bullet.

She stood up for the first time, by herself on Benji's birthday. She limped to the wheel chair so she could use the bathroom. It was great, she was getting better and it was looking like Naomi would be sooner.

There's a steel plate in her knee, everyday she did exercises to rid the pain away. It was pinned together at one point where it would get puffy and had to have fluid drain from it. Naomi could barely walk for over a month, and she could barely shower by herself. I helped her, every single day, helping her shower, helping her walk and dress. Sometimes I had to help her go to the bathroom; she hated for me to help, she was embarrassed, but I did it regardless. I didn't mind doing any of it, she needed me.

I spent everyday with her. I made sure she knew I wasn't going anywhere, because I wasn't. Anything she needed I was right there, as were our kids.

All while Naomi was recovering, so were the boys. Lewy's hand hadn't completely healed, but it was getting there. He and Benji saw a therapist every week, talking about what had happened and they gradually slept better at night.

In May, Lewy graduated from Kindergarten, but Naomi wasn't able to make it. I took video and tons of pictures for her. After, we all went to the hospital, visited her, brought cake and showered her the pictures. Then, she was in a better room and an amazing bed that catered to the needs of her knee and leveled it so fluid and blood wouldn't collect and cause an infection. She was mobile, but still needed someone to help her; if it wasn't me, a nurse was on call 24/7.

It was just after my birthday that she got to come home. She had done a few rounds of rehab and could walk only with a cane. Her hair was a lot longer and her smile came back in full force. Naomi let people visit and see her, but she had her days where she wanted to be alone. Those days were fewer and fewer.

Bringing her home was the greatest thing. She was stress free and she was getting used to putting weight on her leg, but she used a cane, or crutches sometimes. I carried her bridal style into the house; the boys told her to close her eyes since it would be the first time she'd seen it.

"They're closed," I told them. "Right Naomi?"

Naomi giggled, eyes shut with one arm wrapped around my neck, "Yes!"

Lee, Amy, Abbey, my parents and my brother and sister walked behind us. Naomi inhaled softly as I carried her past the threshold, "Ready?" I whispered in her ear.

"Yeah," she exhaled the soft breath.

I set her down on her feet, holding her to keep weight off her knee; "On the count of 3 you can open your eyes."

Naomi smiled and gave a small nod, "Got it."

"1," Benji and Lewy said together, "2...3. Open 'em!"

Naomi opened her eyes and laughed, "Wow!"

The living room was decorated with a Welcome Home Naomi banner over the fireplace mantle, balloons, streamers, food with cake and ice cream. Patrick, Joe, Andy, Ricky and Rae were all there, near tears cheering for her. Naomi gaped, her palm cupping her mouth, "Patrick, Andy and Joe?!"

They laughed and came over; Joe hugged her first, then Andy and Patrick. Naomi cried, hugging them tight, "You sneaky bastards! Where the hell have you been?!"

They laughed again; Patrick answered, "Setting this up."

"You jerks couldn't visit me in the hospital?"

"That would've ruined the surprise!" Andy laughed.

"Thank you guys," she said next, "really, this is crazy. I'm speechless and happy, I...thanks."

Everyone chuckled and came inside. Benji grabbed Naomi's hand, "Mommy, I wanna show you my fish!"

"Okay, Benny, not too fast."

"I know," he said, "Imma help!"

"Thank you, baby."

Naomi took her time walking towards the living room with everyone watching. Benji was careful helping Naomi see the fish, he told her not to bend over too far, it was cute. It was kinda sweet that he was making sure she didn't get hurt.

I knew having her home would be great.